


wonWOW has left the chat

by saranghaetae



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drinking, Eventual Smut, Group chat, Horny little shits, Light Angst, M/M, Mentions of BTS - Freeform, Minor Character(s), Texting, bts is temporary, chan is indifferent, chan is slowly losing his innocence, chan needs a gf, eventual ooc, i mean who doesnt tbh, im meanie trash, jeonghan and soonyoung are bigbang trash, jun is a good best friend, jun is thirsty (for minghao), mingyu and wonwoo are kinda moving fast but itll all work out in the end, seokmin is "innocent", seokmin tries to keep chan's innocence, seungkwan gets dicked often, seungkwan is sassy, smut in chap 5, tagging as I go along, the seoksoo is there if you squint, they all love eachother, vernon likes seungkwan's thighs, who isnt meanie trash, wonu is shy, wonwoo is a lil sensitive, wonwoo is tired and confused, wonwoo's kinda soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2018-11-04 21:42:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 34,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10999566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saranghaetae/pseuds/saranghaetae
Summary: -dkay has added Garden Fairy and Hot Chinese Guy to the chatHot Chinese Guy: seokmin what the fuck, minghao was about to give me headdkay: aw that's cutedkay: now help me with my psychology essay-Hot Chinese Guy has changed Garden Fairy's name to wonWOW-wonWOW has left the chat





	1. jun is clearly really funny

**Author's Note:**

> prepare for the ultimate shitshow

**dkay**  added  **Garden Fairy** and  **Hot Chinese Guy** to the chat

 **Garden Fairy:** Um

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** seokmin what the fuck, minghao was about to give me head

 **dkay:** aw that's cute

 **dkay:** now help me with my psychology essay

 **Hot Chinese Guy** changed  **Garden Fairy** 's name to  **wonWOW**

 **wonWOW** has left the chat

 **dkay:** seriously

 **dkay** added  **wonWOW** to the chat

 **dkay** changed  **wonWOW** 's name to  **Garden Fairy**

 **dkay:** i actually need help, this class is killing me :(

 **Garden Fairy:** only if jun agrees not to call me wonwow..

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** idk cant make any promises

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** also holy shit, minghao is good at giving head

 **dkay:** omgosh stop traumatizing me

 **Garden Fairy:** is this the essay about persuasion

 **dkay:** yeah

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** makes sense, you suck at persuading people

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** probably why you haven't gotten laid in..

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** ever

 **dkay:** thats just because i don't want to commit sins

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** whatever floats your boat

 **Garden Fairy:**.. anyways, i finished that essay last week i'll send you it so you can get "inspiration"

 **dkay:** am i not allowed to just copy it

 **Garden Fairy** sent a file

 **Garden Fairy:** no, that would be cheating

 **Garden Fairy:** have you read the textbook?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo we all know that you're the only one who reads it

 **dkay:** yeah.. i haven't read anything since the beginning of the semester

 **Garden Fairy:** wtf why

 **Garden Fairy:** the books are actually really interesting

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** can i add hao

 **dkay:** i mean ok

 **Hot Chinese Guy** has added  **NotThe8** to the chat

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hao wipe the cum off of your chin

 **NotThe8:** what the fuck jun

 **dkay:** hi haohao~

 **NotThe8:** hey seokmin

 **Garden Fairy:** this is gay

 **NotThe8:** you are too

 **NotThe8:** at least thats what jun told me

 **Garden Fairy:**???? jun what the hell

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** sorry not sorry

 **dkay:** anyways my essay

 **dkay:** should i just look up what to write

 **Garden Fairy:** i literally gave you mine

 **Garden Fairy:** take the ideas from it and put them into your own words

 **dkay:** that souns like hard work

 **Garden Fairy:** i guess

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** this is the most boring group chat ever

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** can i add fun people

 **dkay:** to be fair i made it for essay help but do what you want

 **NotThe8:** im going to add mingyu

 **NotThe8:** is that okay wonwoo?

 **Garden Fairy:** why would i care

 **NotThe8:** i thought you were pining after him..

 **Garden Fairy:** JUN

 **Hot Chinese Guy** has added  **Divaboo, youneedjisoos,** and  **kwon sunyoung** to the chat

 **Divaboo:** heyyy bitches

 **Divaboo:** whats this

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** a group chat i guess

 **youneedjisoos:** wait why

 **NotThe8:** so i can add mingyu?

 **Garden Fairy:**..

 **NotThe8** has added  **the giant** to the chat

 **kwon sunyoung:** omg seokmin's here?

 **kwon sunyoung:** seokkkieeeeee

 **dkay:** hi

 **dkay:** wait so wonwoo i should just use the ideas right

 **the giant:** wonwoo's here?

 **Garden Fairy:** for fuck's sake just copy the essay i don't care

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo you have a small dick

 **youneedjisoos:** didnt need that mental image

 **NotThe8:** where'd that come from

 **Divaboo:** kinky

 **Garden Fairy:** jun

 **kwon sunyoung:** wait seungkwan, how's that kinky

 **dkay:** yeah how

 **Garden Fairy:** wen junhui

 **Divaboo:** it just is

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** it was a joke, fuck

 **NotThe8:** jun is clearly really funny

 **Garden Fairy** has left the chat

 **dkay:** you made him leave again???

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** mingyu go cheer him up

 **the giant:** why me

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** idk just do it

 **NotThe8:** you should, the rest of us are busy

 **the giant:** wait but

 **NotThe8** has muted the chat

 **Hot Chinese Guy** has muted the chat

 **youneedjisoos** has muted the chat

 **Divaboo** has muted the chat

 **kwon sunyoung** has muted the chat

 **dkay** has muted the chat

 **the giant:** k

-

 

 **the giant** has started a private chat with  **Garden Fairy**

 **the giant:** hey whats wrong

 **the giant:** talk to me

 **Garden Fairy:** nothing

 **Garden Fairy:** i just left because i have work to do

 **the giant:** are you sure?

 **Garden Fairy:** yep

 **the giant** has changed chat name to  **WonWOAH**

 **Garden Fairy:** wtf i hate you

 **the giant:** you love me

 **Garden Fairy:** that's ridiculous

 **the giant:** ignore jun

 **the giant:** you're his best friend, you know how he is


	2. boo seungkwan is a hoe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> published this and updated it all in one day, proud of myself lmao
> 
> hope y'all enjoy

**Hot Chinese Guy:** morning kids

 **youneedjisoos:** i'm older than you

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** yeah but you're also a bottom so i can call you kid

 **youneedjisoos:** funny, i didn't know that it worked that way

 **Divaboo:** morning hoes

 **Divaboo:** where's wonwoo

 **the giant** has added  **Garden Fairy** to the chat

 **the giant:** he's here

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** jesus christ can you guys just fuck already

 **youneedjisoos:** i think you mean Jisoos Christ

 **Garden Fairy:** i'm not a slut like you jun

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wait you didn't say no

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** does that mean youre not opposed to fucking mingyu?

 **Garden Fairy:** where'd you get that idea

 **Garden Fairy:** i literally just called you a slut, nothing else

 **NotThe8:** jun is the biggest slut i've ever seen

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** excuse you, xu minghao

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i'll fuck you so hard you can't walk for a week if you don't stay quiet

 **dkay:** ew

 **Divaboo:** gross

 **youneedjisoos:** wtf stop, this is supposed to be a clean chat

 **NotThe8:** is that supposed to be a punishment?

 **kwon sunyoung:** guys guys don't fight

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** damn, how kinky are you baby

 **NotThe8:** very

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hot

 **Divaboo:** gags

 **Garden Fairy:** you guys are so bad

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wait seungkwan thats a good idea, do you wanna try a ballgag haohao?

 **youneedjisoos:** oh my gOD

 **dkay:** stop stop stop stop stop stop

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** what? i'm just asking him

 **youneedjisoos** has added  **Mom** to the chat

 **youneedjisoos:** jeonghan please tell them to stop talking about sex toys

 **Garden Fairy:** them?? it was just jun and minghao

 **NotThe8:** i didn't say anything

 **Divaboo:** uh huh

 **Mom:**..

 **Mom:** Be good, kids

 **Mom** has left the chat

 **dkay:** who was that

 **Garden Fairy:** jeonghan-hyung, he's a junior

 **Garden Fairy:** he's the one with the long hair

 **dkay:** ohhh

 **dkay:** i never finished my essay

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wtf, wasnt that the point of this chat

 **Garden Fairy:** you didnt even help him

 **NotThe8:** you heard mom, be good kids

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you're younger than both of us

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** and i'm not a bottom

 **NotThe8:** wonwoo is

 **Garden Fairy:**?????? minghao, not you too

 **NotThe8:** i'm telling you, thats just what jun told me

 **the giant:** sigh

 

 **Divaboo:** oh my god guys

 **Divaboo:** im melting

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** what the fuck are you, a snowman?

 **the giant:** i feel like he'd be a popsicle

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

 **Divaboo:** wtf that's not what i meant

 **Divaboo:** i meant this really really hot guy just walked into my music theory lecture and i really want him to eat me out

 **youneedjisoos:** wow you sinner

 **kwon sunyoung** **:** slow down tiger

 **Divaboo:** no i'm not kidding he's so hot oh my goddddd

 **youneedjisoos:** aw seungkwan, i'm not just your god, i'm everyones god

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hong jisoo you are the biggest fucking dork in here

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** never talk to me again

 **NotThe8:** wait seungkwan what does he look like

 **dkay:** yeah i'm curious now

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** where'd you come from

 **kwon sunyoung:** welcome back seokminnie~

 **dkay:** thanks soonyoungie~

 **Garden Fairy:** snort

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** that's my thing

 **Garden Fairy:** idc

 **Divaboo:** *pants*

**Divaboo:**

**Divaboo:** i got a picture of him hnnnnn

 **Garden Fairy:** wait is that

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** IS THAT MINGYU

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** seungkwan ask mingyu if he knows that kids name

 **the giant:** oh, that's vernon

 **the giant:** i look fucking ugly in that picture

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you always look ugly

 **NotThe8:** hey now

 **kwon sunyoung:** don't fight!

 **Divaboo:** omg omg

 **Divaboo:** can you ask him if he's snigle

 **dkay:** whats a snigle

 **Divaboo:** single*

 **the giant:** uh k

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** guys i think our seungkwan is going to get dicked

 **Divaboo:** hnnh i want him to dick me

 **youneedjisoos:** who are you, minghao?

 **Garden Fairy:** ayyyyyy

 **NotThe8:** rude..

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** don't insult my boyfriend by comparing him to seungkwan

 **dkay:** jun the savage

 **the giant:** he's single

 **the giant:** vernon's actually pretty cool, i've talked to him a couple times

 **the giant:** he's a transfer from an american university

 **Divaboo:** fuck, can you get me his number

 **the giant:** i mean i got his kakao..

 **Divaboo:** ADD HIMHH

 **the giant:** calm the fuck down

 **the giant** added  **High Quality English** to the chat

 **NotThe8:** boo seungkwan is a hoe

 **NotThe8:** a giant, filthy hoe

 **Divaboo:** im not giant, i'm thicc

 **youneedjisoos:** uh

 **Garden Fairy:** um

 **the giant:** hey vernon, these are my dumbfuck friends

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** since when are we friends

 **High Quality English:** hey

 **Divaboo:** こんにちはパパ 

 **High Quality English:** what'd he say

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

 **youneedjisoos:** i think he said.. uh, "hi daddy"

 **Divaboo:** what no

 **Divaboo:** im not weird like that

 **Garden Fairy:** i beg to differ

 **High Quality English:** so.. what are your majors

 **Divaboo:** vocal composition

 **Garden Fairy:** i'm a dual major.. psychology and literature

 **dkay:** psychology

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** acting

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** which is 10x better than vocal shit

 **Divaboo:** fuc k off

 **NotThe8:** dance

 **kwon sunyoung:** i just came out of nowhere but my major is also dance ^^

 **youneedjisoos:** music education, i plan on being a vocal professor

 **the giant:** mine's acting

 **High Quality English:** pretty diverse then

 **High Quality English:** im also a dual major, hip-hop studies and jazz composition

 **Divaboo:** that's so cool

 **Divaboo:** i'm seungkwan by the way

 **NotThe8:** jun you were right, kwan's definitely getting dicked

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** when am i ever wrong

 **Garden Fairy:** 99% of the time

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** fuck you jeon wonwoo

 **High Quality English:** wait, someone's getting dicked? 

 **High Quality English:** damn, let me know how it goes

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i like this kid

 **Garden Fairy:** snort

 **youneedjisoos:** snort

 

 **Divaboo** has started a private chat with  **High Quality English**

 **Divaboo:** you're hot

 **Divaboo:** really hot

 **High Quality English:** that took you long enough

 **Divaboo:** wait what

 **High Quality English:** lol mingyu showed me the texts from that group chat

 **High Quality English:** i'll think about eating you out

 **High Quality English:** let me see what you look like though?

 **Divaboo:** fuck

 **Divaboo:** okay

**Divaboo:**

**Divaboo:** sorry, i'm not pretty

 **High Quality English:** shit, you're cute

 **Divaboo:** oh.. thanks

 **High Quality English:** hey

 **High Quality English:** meet me outside after music theory on thursday

 **High Quality English:** i might eat you out

 **Divaboo:** oh my god yes

 **Divaboo:** don't text me this shit in the middle of class you'll make me wet

 **High Quality English:** since when is that a bad thing

 

 **Divaboo** has started a private chat with  **NotThe8**

 **Divaboo:** o my god minghao i need help

 **NotThe8:** i'm not jacking you off leaf me alone

 **Divaboo:** what the fuck? i'm not jun, that's not what i mean

 **Divaboo:** vernon said he'd eat me out

 **Divaboo:** i'm freaking the fuck out

 **NotThe8:** omg

 **NotThe8:** i gotta tell jun

 **Divaboo:** NO

 **Divaboo:** how um

 **Divaboo:** how does one get eaten out

 **NotThe8:** wow

 **NotThe8:** well i mean usually i sit on jun's face and 

 **Divaboo:** no no i don't want details you sick fuck

 **NotThe8:** just sit on his face it feels good

 **Divaboo:** okay..

 

 

 **dkay** added  **fanboy** to the chat

 **dkay:** guys this is lee chan

 **dkay:** he's pure don't taint him

 **kwon sunyoung:** omg!! hi i'm soonyoung nice to meet you! <3

 **fanboy:** hi

 **Divaboo:** fuck omg

 **Divaboo:** vernonnnnnnn

 **High Quality English:** shh

 **Divaboo:** i caaaant

 **High Quality English:** why dont you focus on what i'm doing instead of broadcasting it in the group chat

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** OH MY GOD SEUNGKWAN'S GETTING DICKED

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** GOOD JOB KWANNIE IM PROUD

 **Garden Fairy:** can u shut the fuck up

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you're just mad that mingyu won't eat you out

 **Garden Fairy:** what????

 **NotThe8:** exposed

 **youneedjisoos:** oh my gosh guys stop being gross we have a new member of the group

 **youneedjisoos:** dont scare him

 **fanboy:** this is um interesting

 **fanboy:** honestly better than this lecture so!

 **fanboy:** its okay

 **youneedjisoos:** hunny no don't encourage them

 **the giant:** wait what about eating wonwoo out

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** LOL

 **Garden Fairy:** uh um

 **kwon sunyoung:** guys be nice to wonwoo!

 **kwon sunyoung:** he has done nothing wrong!

 **NotThe8:** we're being nice

 **NotThe8:** very nice

 **Divaboo:** VERNONNN

 **Garden Fairy:** jesus what the fuck is happening to him

 **youneedjisoos:** jisoos*

 **dkay:** you guys are filthy

 **dkay:** absolutely filthy

 **Garden Fairy:** what did i do

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** what do you think is happening to him genius

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** aren't you supposed to be smart

 **the giant:** hey he is smart

 **NotThe8:** oo

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** mingyu please eat wonwoo out

 **the giant:** k

 **Garden Fairy:** wait wHAT?

 **Garden Fairy:** i didNT ask fOr thiS 

 **NotThe8:** seungkwan did you sit on his face?

 **NotThe8:** i told you it feels good

 **Divaboo:** that's for me to know and vernon to find out

 **NotThe8:** wait you didn't sit on his face yet

 **Divaboo:** shrug

 **youneedjisoos:** goodnight nasty hoes

 **the giant:** it's 4pm

 **youneedjisoos:** exactly 

 

_a/n;_

 

seungkwan totally said "hi daddy" in japanese

hope you guys liked my 'very nice' reference ;)


	3. the garden fairy is mad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jeonghan will appear next chapter  
> i was honestly planning to write smut but  
> it's 2:52 and i cant keep my eyes open, let alone write some spicy verkwan so this will have to do
> 
> hope you guys enjoy the chapter <3

**Hot Chinese Guy:** seungkwan

**Hot Chinese Guy:** how'd you get vernon to fuck you that quick

**Hot Chinese Guy:** you need to teach wonwoo your ways

**Divaboo:** what

**Garden Fairy:** he doesn't need to teach me anything, i'm fine

**Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

**Hot Chinese Guy:** mingyu should be wrapped around your finger by now

**the giant:**???? 

**Divaboo:** i mean i just said i wanted him to eat me out

**Divaboo:** didnt really do anything else..

**dkay** changed  **kwon sunyoung** 's name to  **kwon sinyoung**

**dkay:** oh soonyounggggieeee

**dkay:** i know what you diiiiid

**youneedjisoos:** oh no

**Hot Chinese Guy:** did soon get the dicking?

**Hot Chinese Guy:** or did he do the dicking

**dkay:** i dunno, maybe you should ask him ^_^

**the giant:** that emoji scares me 

**the giant:** a lot

**Garden Fairy:** seokmin in general scares me

**Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

**kwon sinyoung:** i didnt do anything

**kwon sinyoung:** i promisee

**dkay:** liar

**dkay:** i guess we'll just have to ask jihoon~

**dkay** added  **edgelord** to the chat

**edgelord:** ick what is this

**edgelord:** i don't even know half of you

**dkay:** jihoon

**edgelord:** seokmin

**dkay:** does soonyoung usually push you up against walls in the hallway?

**NotThe8:** sNORT

**Hot Chinese Guy:** snort x2

**youneedjisoos:** snort x3

**Garden Fairy:** snort x4

**the giant:** poor jihoon

**edgelord:** um yeah

**NotThe8:** snort SNORT

**youneedjisoos:** are you inhaling cocaine or making fun of this jihoon guy

**Hot Chinese Guy:** he's actually inhaling my cum

**youneedjisoos:** whAT THE FUCK

**Garden Fairy:** WEN JUNHUI

**youneedjisoos:** JUN YOU SICK BASTARD

**dkay:** wait so he does push you up against walls regularly?

**edgelord:** i

**edgelord:** i guess

**kwon sinyoung:** jihoon.

**dkay:** this is very interesting!

**kwon sinyoung:** seokmin.

**Hot Chinese Guy:** the bitch is using periods he must be pissed

**NotThe8:** pissed soonyoung? that's a rare site

**Divaboo:** sight*

**Garden Fairy:** sight*

**Garden Fairy:** boo seungkwan i'm the lit major here fuck off

**Hot Chinese Guy:** the garden fairy is mad!!

**Hot Chinese Guy:** oh hunnie, did mingyu still not fuck your face?

**Garden Fairy:** i hope u choke on minghao's dick

**kwon sinyoung:** seokmin, you already knew about us, why are you making such a big deal

**dkay:** im not

**dkay:** i just find it funny that you claim youre so innocent

**edgelord:** seokmin seriously

**edgelord:** i promise we havent had sex

**edgelord:** we would tell you

**the giant:** im not sure how to interpret that

**Garden Fairy:** yeah thats a little weird

**dkay:** you promise?

**kwon sinyoung:** seokminnieeee

**kwon sinyoung:** you're my best friend, i would tell you

**kwon sinyoung:** when jihoonie and i get married you better be my best man

**Hot Chinese Guy:** ewwwwwwwwww

**Divaboo:** romance is gross

**High Quality English:** that's not what you thought when you cuddled up against me last night

**Hot Chinese Guy:** GET EXPOSED BOO SEUNGKWAN

**the giant:** i have no regrets in setting this up wow

**the giant:** so vernon are you and seungkwan fuck buddies

**Divaboo:** ugh vernon where'd you even come from

**High Quality English:** dont know

**High Quality English:** he has really nice thighs so we better be

**NotThe8:** ick

**youneedjisoos:** vernon i have never talked to you before but i will warn you right now!

**youneedjisoos:** no talking about fucking seungkwan in this pure group chat

**youneedjisoos:** jun is already bad enough :((

**Divaboo:** seungkwan's feelings are hurt

**NotThe8:** what are feelings

**Hot Chinese Guy:** feelings are what you experience when im buried inside you and you're screaming my name

**youneedjisoos:** JUN!

**edgelord:** thats nice

**fanboy:** yawn

**fanboy:** i just woke up and the first thing i hear about is sex..

**fanboy:** fantastic!!

**dkay:** omg im so sorry channie

**dkay:** dont mind them, everyone in this chat is sinful

**youneedjisoos:** excuuse me

**dkay:** except jisoo, he's our savior

**fanboy:** oh ok

 

Seungkwan groans as he rolls off the side of his low-lying mattress. It's nearly one in the afternoon, and that means he has to go to his Music Theory lecture. God, he hates Music Theory. The only reason he's still in the class is for mandatory credits, and of course the luxury of riding Vernon after class. He pulls on a loose black sweater and his favorite skinny jeans, glancing in the mirror before he moves over to pull on his worn cream Converse. He checks the time, reading 12:43, and sighs as he grabs his backpack.  _Time for three hours of hell,_ he thinks, completely and utterly annoyed.

The walk to the vocal studies building takes less than ten minutes, and Seungkwan now fidgets nervously in his seat, waiting for Vernon to arrive. Class starts in four minutes, and he honestly doesn't want the other boy to come in late. Lost in his thoughts, he doesn't notice when Vernon quietly settles into the seat next to him, draping his coat along the chair. "Seungkwan," he murmurs, turning towards the boy. "What do you want to do after class?"

Surprised by the sudden question, Seungkwan shifts in his seat. "Um.." he drawls, leaning his head into his palm. "Could you maybe, um-" He's interrupted as Vernon runs his hand along the small of his back. He doesn't understand how Vernon does this to him. "F-fuck my thighs?" 

Vernon lets out a silent, breathy laugh and nods, canines poking out from beneath his lip. "Of course I can."

 

**Divaboo** added  **Garden Fairy, NotThe8,** and  **Hot Chinese Guy** to the chat

**Divaboo:** guys i asked vernon to fuck my thighs

**Garden Fairy:** what the fuck

**Hot Chinese Guy:** aw good job seungkwan

**Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo you really need to ask mingyu to fuck your thighs too

**Garden Fairy:**...

**NotThe8:** ladies, ladies

**Divaboo:** IM GONNA GET DICKED IN TWO HOURS IM SO EXCITED FUCK

**Divaboo:** THANK GOD MINGYU KNEW HIM

**Garden Fairy:** yeah mingyu is cool

**Hot Chinese Guy:** "cool" 

**Hot Chinese Guy:** do you still have wet dreams about him?

**Hot Chinese Guy:**  "ahh gyu, harder~"

**Garden Fairy:** oh my god

**Garden Fairy:** xu minghao tell your boyfriend that he's a terrible person

**NotThe8:** jun you're a terrible person but i love it when you put your dick down my throat

**Hot Chinese Guy:** ik you do baby

**Divaboo:** gag

**Garden Fairy:** snort

**Divaboo:** ugg i'm really worried

**Divaboo:** what is getting your thighs fucked like

**NotThe8:** its hot

**NotThe8:** its almost as good as sitting on jun's face

**Hot Chinese Guy** has named the chat  **wonwoo wants mingyu's cock**

**Garden Fairy:** ugh

**Garden Fairy:** why do you want us to hook up so bad

**Hot Chinese Guy:** bcus i want you to be happy

**Hot Chinese Guy:** we are best friends remember

**NotThe8:** aw sweet

**Divaboo:** chokes

**NotThe8:** on vernon's dick?

**Divaboo:** mm fuck i wishh

**NotThe8:** i bet you jun's is thicker

**Divaboo:** no way

**Garden Fairy:** what is this conversation

**Garden Fairy:** i'm tempted to go all hong jisoo on you

**Hot Chinese Guy:** hey wonwoo

**Garden Fairy:** what

**Hot Chinese Guy:** if you go up to mingyu and sit in his lap in the next week i will give you 50,000 won

**Divaboo:** holy hell thats 50,000 won, you gotta do it fairy

**Divaboo:** i can help you

**Garden Fairy:** um.. no

**Hot Chinese Guy:** if you don't i will have sex with him

**NotThe8:** wait what?

**NotThe8:** woah woah woah

**NotThe8:** would you be top or bottom?

**Hot Chinese Guy:** top obvi

**Garden Fairy:** i dont even know how to respond.. to that

**Divaboo:** wonwoo it's free money just do itttt

**NotThe8:** yeah you should do it, jun only gets to fuck my ass

**Divaboo:** ick

**Garden Fairy:**..

**Garden Fairy:** okay.

**Hot Chinese Guy:** SQUEAL

**Hot Chinese Guy:** all you gotta do is sit in his lap

**Hot Chinese Guy:** maybe grind on him "accidentally"

**Garden Fairy:** this is dumb

**Garden Fairy:** but i need the won because i found this new book 

**NotThe8:** whats a book

**Divaboo:** booring

**Divaboo:** why dont you buy a dildo with it

**Hot Chinese Guy:** LOL

**NotThe8:** wonwoo + dildo, that's probably all of mingyu's wet dreams

**Garden Fairy:** i really hate all of you wow

**Garden Fairy:** like please die

**Hot Chinese Guy:** you already agreed, cant back out now

**Divaboo:** mmph class is almost over i'm going to mentally prepare for this dicking

**Divaboo:** dont blow up my phone please

 

The second the clock strikes 3:30, Seungkwan shoots out of his seat. Finally, his dumbass music theory class has ended, and now all he has to do is wait for Vernon. He slips out of the stuffy lecture hall, making a beeline for the abandoned closet that he and Vernon tend to visit often. He locks himself inside, setting his bag in the corner and waiting for a knock. 

After roughly five minutes of waiting, Seungkwan opens to door to find a -very attractive- Vernon. Before he can realize what's happening, Vernon pushes him inside of the room, flicking the light off and capturing Seungkwan's lips. Within seconds Seungkwan parts them, allowing Vernon to explore his mouth with his tongue. A tiny whimper makes its way out of Seungkwan's throat, hanging in the air like smoke. Vernon smirks against his skin, momentarily pulling away from the kiss. "Remember baby, you gotta be quiet," he murmurs, running his fingers through Seungkwan's hair. "I wish I could hear you moan my name right now."

"Vernon.." he mutters, closing his eyes. His head falls back as Vernon peppers kisses along his collarbones, neck, chest, everywhere. It's heaven, and Seungkwan is pretty sure he's the luckiest person in the world. 

 

**Hot Chinese Guy:** seungkwan got a dicking again guys

**Divaboo:** hansol vernon choi

**Divaboo:** why do i have a very very big hickey on my neck

**High Quality English:** you have sexy thighs

**Divaboo:** i know but how do i hide this

**High Quality English:** you don't

**Divaboo:** but it's big

**High Quality English:** i know i'm big

**youneedjisoos:** gag

**youneedjisoos:** almost as bad as jun and minghao wht

**NotThe8:** hey

**Divaboo:** ugh you are big but so is this hickey

**Divaboo:** everyone's gonna know i got my thighs fucked

**edgelord:** you got your thighs fucked?

**Hot Chinese Guy:** actually they're gonna think you got your ass fucked

**dkay:** are we gonna ignore the fact that seungkwan just called vernon big in our very pure group chat?

**dkay:** i am worried for chan's mental health

**fanboy:** huh?

**fanboy:** oh i wasnt even listening to the chat dont worry

**fanboy:** michael jackson is more important

**kwon sinyoung:** oh thats why his name is fanboy!

**Divaboo:** guuuys

**Divaboo:** i dont want everyone to know i got my thighs fucked

**High Quality English:** why

**High Quality English:** you're so sexy, im proud of being able to fuck your thighs

**Hot Chinese Guy:** gag

**Hot Chinese Guy:** is this how you guys feel when i talk about haohao

**Garden Fairy:** yep

**Garden Fairy:** feel our pain you ogre

**NotThe8:** dont call my boyfriend an ogre

**Hot Chinese Guy:** yeah wonwoo, you can't even get laid

**Divaboo:** he'll get laid soon, right won?

**dkay:** this is ew

**youneedjisoos:** ikr they're so gross

**Garden Fairy:** wait, i'm getting laid soon?

 

_a/n;_

 

writing this at 3:15 am

i really love this fic


	4. you don't need to beg in chinese

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been watching house hunters the entire day
> 
> this chapter is wild jfc

**fanboy:** do you guys know michael jackson

 **edgelord:** the dead guy?

 **youneedjisoos:** we do not talk about death in this chat

 **fanboy:** oh my gosh

 **fanboy:** hes not just some dead guy

 **fanboy:** he is the best singer that has ever blessed the earth

 **Divaboo:**! excuse me

 **Divaboo:** i dont think so

 **fanboy:** are you insulting michael jaCKSON 

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** alert alert

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** fanboy spotted

 **fanboy:** well thats why my name is fanboy

 **fanboy:** duhh

 **Garden Fairy:** michael jackson is cool

 **fanboy:** thank you!

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you also said mingyu is cool, so you must want michael jackson down your throat

 **fanboy:** oh my gosh my eyes

 **fanboy:** stop defiling him!

 **Garden Fairy:** jun, i do not want a dead man down my throat

 **Garden Fairy:** that is necrophilia

 **youneedjisoos:** can y'all stop

 **youneedjisoos** added  **Mom** to the chat

 **Mom:** Hi again

 **Mom:** What is this

 **youneedjisoos:** they keep talking about death and fucking eachother

 **Mom:** Oh

 **edgelord:** hi jeonghan

 **Mom:** jihoon!

 **Mom:** Cheollie misses you~

 **edgelord:** im literally two rooms over from him

 **Garden Fairy:** hi jeonghan

 **Mom:** Wonwoo?

 **Garden Fairy:** mhm

 **Mom:** Did you get Mingyu to do anything yet?

 **the giant:** am i missing something or

 **Garden Fairy:** what do you mean

 **Garden Fairy:** did jun tell you something

 **Mom:** Jun?

 **Mom:** Who's Jun

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** me

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** minghao is my boyfriend

 **NotThe8:** yeah

 **Mom:** Cute

 **Garden Fairy:** so youre telling me jun didnt say anything

 **Mom:** I thought it was obvious ^^

 **Mom:** Mingyu, isn't Wonwoo cute?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

 **dkay:** the wonwoo bullying is real

 **the giant:** ofcourse he is

 **kwon sinyoung:** omggggggggg

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort x2

 **Mom:** Can I add Seungcheol?

 **youneedjisoos:** ask seokmin

 **dkay:** why me

 **dkay:** you can add whoever you want

 **edgelord:** i mean you did create this shitshow

 **youneedjisoos:** language!

 **edgelord:** jisoo

 **edgelord:** you swear all the time

 **youneedjisoos:** but we have a child in this chat

 **edgelord:** that hasn't stopped you

 **Mom** has added  **Father** to the chat

 **Father:**??

 **Mom:** Cheollie, this is a group chat

 **Father:** and

 **edgelord:** hey seungcheol

 **Father:** oh jihoon's here

 **Father:** who's garden fairy and hot chinese guy

 **Father:** and the giant and notthe8 and divaboo

 **Mom:** Garden Fairy is Wonwoo and Hot Chinese Guy is named Jun

 **the giant:** i'm mingyu

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** notthe8 is my boyfriend

 **Father:** ok whats his name

 **NotThe8:** im xu minghao

 **Divaboo:** xu minghao is a whore

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hey do you want to get fucking cut

 **dkay:** no slutshaming in my chat

 **NotThe8:** wait im a slut and a whore?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** youre my slut

 **Garden Fairy:** gag

 **Divaboo:** gag

 **Father:** this is interesting

 **fanboy:** is that seungcheol

 **kwon sinyoung:** our baby chan knows seungcheol?

 **fanboy:** i know pretty much everyone

 **fanboy:** hi cheol

 **Father:** hey

 **Father:** divaboo who

 **Divaboo:** boo seungkwan

 **Divaboo:** im the hottest one here

 **NotThe8:** hey woah

 **youneedjisoos:** i think not

 **edgelord:** thats a good joke seungkwan

 **High Quality English:** i agree seungkwan is the hottest one here

 **Mom:** Cheollie is the hottest :(

 **Father:** nah you are hannie

 **youneedjisoos:** ick, what an old married couple

 **Father:** youre the same age as us

 **edgelord:** hes not wrong

 **edgelord:** hong jisoo just refuses to find a boyfriend

 **youneedjisoos:** i am a holy figure, i have no business trying to hook up with people like you nasties

 **Garden Fairy:** what why am i nasty

 **Garden Fairy:** i havent even

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** oh please won we all know you want mingyu

 **the giant:** hey

 **the giant:** be nice to him

 **kwon sinyoung:** aw

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** aw wonwoo's boyfriend is protecting him

 **NotThe8:** why dont you protect me

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** aw baby i do

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** remember that time i didn't cum in your mouth because your throat hurt?

 **Divaboo:** eW

 **youneedjisoos:** im so done

 **Mom:** Be good kids

 **Mom:** That is inappropriate

 **NotThe8:** oh yeah

 **NotThe8:** that was nice of you

 **Father:** hannie i've heard worse come out of your mouth

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** EXPOSED

 **Garden Fairy:** ugh

 

 **Hot Chinese Guy** has started a private chat with  **Garden Fairy**

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** oh wonwooo

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** it's been a week

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** did you sit on mingyu's lap yet

 **Garden Fairy:** im gonna do it today ok

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** if you don't, you know what will happen ;)

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah yeah

 **Garden Fairy:** go away

 

 **NotThe8** has started a private chat with  **Hot Chinese Guy**

 **NotThe8:** 他媽的我

 **NotThe8:** 他媽的我

 **NotThe8:** 他媽的我

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** baby

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you dont need to beg in chinese to get me to fuck you

 **NotThe8:** but i dont want to beg in korean

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** no matter what language you beg in i'll wreck you 

 **NotThe8:** really?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** if you come over later i'll show you

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** we should invite everyone to the club

 **NotThe8:** so that wonwoo cant get out of the dare?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** exactly

 **NotThe8:** m2?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** too expensive

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** we're all broke

 **NotThe8:** answer?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** thats all the way in gangnam

 **NotThe8:** but

 **NotThe8:** if wonwoo gets laid we want to make sure its in a nice club right

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i mean yeah

 **NotThe8:** answer then? or we can go to octagon

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** answer

 

 

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hey guys lets go to the club tonight

 **Divaboo:** YES

 **Divaboo:** only if vernon comes

 **youneedjisoos:** gag

 **High Quality English:** i'll come

 **dkay:** i'm in

 **fanboy:** same but i dont wanna get hammered so i'll be dd

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** boring

 **Garden Fairy:** i mean ok

 **the giant:** i'll be there

 **Mom:** Cheollie and I will come~

 **kwon sinyoung:** im not drinking!

 **edgelord:** if soonyoung goes i will

 **kwon sinyoung:** aw

 **dkay:** ick

 **youneedjisoos:** obviously im going

 **youneedjisoos:** i need to stop you guys from grinding on eachother

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** ;)

 **Divaboo:** ;)

 **NotThe8:** wonwoo

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** ;)

 **Garden Fairy:** what

 **Garden Fairy:** oh

 **Garden Fairy:** dont get your hopes up

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** so everyone's coming?

 **Father:** looks like it

 **Mom:** It's Friday kids, we can drink as much as we want

 **Father:** as much as we can afford*

 **NotThe8:** wonwoo will have 50,000 won so we can make him pay

 **Garden Fairy:** why me

 **Garden Fairy:** wont jun have 50,000 won? hes the one paying me

 **the giant:** did i miss something

 **dkay:** yeah im confused

 **Divaboo:** nothing~

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** how about we all pay for our own drinks!

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i'll pay for minghao though

 **NotThe8:** aw babe

 **High Quality English:** i'll pay for seungkwan if he lets me do things to him

 **youneedjisoos:** oh my gosh

 **youneedjisoos:** get a room

 **Mom:** How did you guys become so tainted :(

 **edgelord:** hey you cant say anything jeonghan

 **edgelord:** we all know what seungcheol does to you

 **Father:** leave me out of this

 **Father:** also since when are vernon and seungkwan a thing

 **kwon sinyoung:** oooo

 **kwon sinyoung:** dont fight guys

 **dkay:**!

 **Divaboo:** whats kinds of things vernonie

 **High Quality English:** anything you want boo

 **fanboy:** oh my

 **edgelord:** gross

 **Garden Fairy:** you guys need help

 **Divaboo:** actually i think youre the one that needs help

 **Divaboo:** right jun

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i agree

 **the giant:** to answer seungcheol's question idek if they are a thing

 **the giant:** all i know is that they fuck after music theory

 **High Quality English:** we can be a thing if seungkwan wants

 **Divaboo:** i've only known you for 2 weeks

 **High Quality English:** i ate you out two days after we met

 **the giant:** he has a point

 **Divaboo:** i'll think about it

 **NotThe8:** soooo

 **NotThe8:** who's driving with who

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo i can pick you, mingyu and seungkwan up if you want

 **Garden Fairy:** ok

 **the giant:** im fine with that

 **Divaboo:** but i wanna ride vernon

 **Divaboo:** ride with*

 **youneedjisoos:** gag

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** too bad

 **NotThe8:** what about me

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you'll already be at my dorm baby

 **High Quality English:** you can ride me if you want seungkwan

 **youneedjisoos:** obviously i'm gonna have to deal with seokmin and chan :(

 **fanboy:** hey

 **fanboy:** since im the dd i get to drive your car later ^^

 **Father:** so im guessing i have to shove jeonghan, vernon, jihoon, and soonyoung in my car

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** yep!

 **Mom:** It's a date!

 **Garden Fairy:** a 13 person date

 **Garden Fairy:** fun

 

_a/n;_

hello!

everything with the club will be in the next chapter, and i'm planning to make most of it ooc :)

theres probably gonna be smut too so look forward to that

 


	5. he looks like he wants to bend you over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really suck at present tense  
> i REALLY suck at writing smut
> 
> thank you for the 1k reads in 3 days <3
> 
> enjoy

Wonwoo fastens a thin black choker around his neck and surveys himself in the mirror, silently approving of his appearance. Tonight is going to be hell. It's not that he doesn't like Mingyu, in fact, it's the opposite. However, he doesn't like the idea of putting off the other male because he was forced to sit in his lap. That would be worst case scenario, and Wonwoo, being a raging pessimist, can't get that idea out of his head. He really, _really_  doesn't want to do this. 

He's jolted out of his thoughts when he hears Jun's loud-ass horn, sighing audibly when he realizes it's time to leave. He grabs his phone, glances in the mirror one more time, and rushes out of the door.  _It'll be fine, you'll be fine, nothing bad is going to happen,_ he tells himself, breath quickening as he sprints down the stairs. Outside, Wonwoo is blessed by the sight of Mingyu in a white jacket, black t-shirt, and ripped skinny jeans.

Wow, he's fucked.

Before Wonwoo can stutter out a greeting, Mingyu smiles and his heart stops. "Hey," the taller male breathes, gesturing towards Jun's vehicle. "That prick sent me out here to get you. Are you ready?" Wonwoo nods, shivering subsonciously. "Sorry he made you walk in the cold." The other man chuckles, wrapping his jacket around Wonwoo's trembling shoulders. "It's okay." 

As soon as they reach Jun's car, a wolf whistle leaves Seungkwan's mouth, and Wonwoo is pretty sure that he would slap the shit out of the younger boy if he had no self control. Instead, he settles for a pointed glare, and scoots into the middle seat. Mingyu follows after him, and they're off to get drunk out of their minds.

**Garden Fairy** has started a private chat with  **NotThe8**

**Garden Fairy:** jun's driving and i cant freak out at him so youre second best

**NotThe8:** whats wrong

**Garden Fairy:** mingyu

**Garden Fairy:** hes so fucking nice like this guy gave me his jacket because i was cold how the fuck do i sit on his lap im

**NotThe8:** i can hear you hyperventilating from here hyung

**NotThe8:** honestly thats how i felt when i met jun and you just have to go for it

**NotThe8:** you can drop the dare if you want im sure junnie wouldn't care

**Garden Fairy:** no

**Garden Fairy:** i'll do it, i'm just nervous

**NotThe8:** dw about it

**NotThe8:** also if mingyu is cool with it bam relationship

**Garden Fairy:** i dont want to ruin our friendship

**NotThe8:** you wont

**NotThe8:** he likes you

**NotThe8:** im his best friend remember

**Garden Fairy:** okay

**Garden Fairy:** you're way better than jun at advice

**NotThe8:** i know

After a half-hour drive, Wonwoo has finally gotten out of Jun's tiny ass Nissan Sentra and his thigh is no longer pressed up against Mingyu's. His nerves have hardly worn off, but with a cheap beer and Wen Junhui's blessing, he's determined to get this over with. Wonwoo takes a deep breath and walks over to the booth where everyone is sitting, sharing a glance with Seungkwan before taking a seat next to Mingyu. Their thighs are touching again, and _oh God_ , he can't breathe. When the younger is distracted, he slips on top of his closed legs, holding his breath. Nobody seems to notice what he just did except for Mingyu, who's smirking up at him.  _He's smirking at him._  Wonwoo lets out the breath he was holding, looking away when Mingyu rests his arm around his waist. 

"Is this okay?" Wonwoo asks, wishing he could sink into the ground. The other male simply nods, tightening his grip on Wonwoo. He can tell Jun is looking at him now, and Wonwoo turns to find the biggest shit-eating grin he's ever seen. Just then, he feels his phone buzz, which is unfortunately in his back pocket, and his back pocket is currently pressed very very closely to Mingyu's crotch. He's going to murder Jun later. Wonwoo glares at his best friend, nearly choking when he mouths 'Reach for your phone and I'll give you 20,000 more won.'  Sighing, he reaches his hand down, holding in a gasp when Mingyu wraps his fingers around his wrist. His eyes are dark with what Wonwoo knows is lust, but he retrieves his phone nonetheless. 

**wonwoo wants mingyu's cock**

**Divaboo:** OHMTGOD GOOD JOB WONWooO

**Hot Chinese Guy:** I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT

**Hot Chinese Guy:** DID YOU SEE MINGYUS FACE

**NotThe8:** not gonna lie he looks like he wants to bend you over

**Garden Fairy:** what the fuck

**Garden Fairy:** you owe me 70,000 won jun, you fucker

**Garden Fairy** has named the chat  **jeon wonwoo is fucking deceased**

**Hot Chinese Guy:** okay okay

**Hot Chinese Guy:** minghao lets distract everyone else so mingyu can fuck him

**Garden Fairy:** UM

Wonwoo is currently dead inside.

Jun and Minghao manage to get everyone out to the dance floor, and despite Jeonghan's protests, Mingyu and Wonwoo stay behind. He's still sitting on Mingyu's lap, taking an obscenely long sip of his beer. He knows he's more than a little tipsy, and before he can register what's happening his back is being pushed against the faux leather booth, lips quickly captured by Mingyu's. Wonwoo lets out a breathy moan before the younger man pulls away. "Is this okay?" he voices, repeating Wonwoo's question from earlier.

"Yes," he chokes out, tugging on Mingyu's hair to pull him back into a kiss. It's slower this time, more passionate, and Wonwoo becomes a moaning mess under Mingyu's control. He doesn't even bother fighting for dominance, letting the younger explore his mouth with his tongue. The club is so hectic that he can make as much noise as he wants. Whimpers and moans cloud the air around them, and all Wonwoo can think about is the man above him. Mingyu is intoxicating, and he's waited far too long for this.

Eventually Mingyu pulls away, his lips swollen and hair messy. Wonwoo's breathing is uneven, and it only gets worse when Mingyu's eyes rake over his body like he's some sort of snack. He's suddenly glad that he wore the choker and tight jeans. "I don't want to have sex," he blurts out honestly, sighing. Despite pining over the other for as long as he can remember, Wonwoo really isn't ready for that yet. Mingyu smiles and runs his thumb over Wonwoo's cheek. "Me neither, baby. Not to mention we're all the way in Gangnam, and there's no way my first time with you is going to be in some club." The pet name makes Wonwoo's eyes widen, and he quickly decides that Mingyu calling him 'baby' is the best thing he's ever heard.

"Can I give you head?" Wonwoo whispers, blinking, like it's the most innocent question he's ever asked. Mingyu, with a predatory gleam in his eyes at this point, looks taken aback, but readily agrees. He points in the direction of the bathrooms, pulling Wonwoo off of the seat. Wonwoo takes Mingyu's hand, heart pounding as he's led to the back of the club.

As soon as they're locked in the stall, Wonwoo drops to his knees. He's never done this before, and he's more nervous than words can explain. Mingyu takes his chin in between his fingers, and gives him a reassuring look. "Let me know if you want to st-" 

Before Mingyu can finish his sentence, Wonwoo palms him through his skinny jeans, fussing with the zipper and pulling them down as fast as possible. His boxers are next; within moments Wonwoo is faced with Mingyu's cock, and he runs the tip of his index finger up a thick vein. "I've wanted this for so long," he croaks, licking his lips. Wonwoo leans forward and takes the head into his mouth, precome smearing across his lips. He maintains eye contact with Mingyu as he takes in more, moaning contentedly when the taller man's face twists into pleasure. His hands tangle in Wonwoo's hair, a groan escaping his throat. 

Wonwoo starts bobbing his head, taking in Mingyu's entire length. He flattens his tongue as he moves up and down, Mingyu's deep moans only spurring him on.  _So good baby, so good for me,_  he growls over and over again, resounding in the tiny stall like a mantra. Wonwoo continues to move up and down the throbbing member, relaxing his throat so that Mingyu's dick hits the back of it. He whimpers around it, creating vibrations that drive the other insane.

"Soon," Mingyu breathes, slowly thrusting into the wet heat. Wonwoo sucks faster, hollowing out his cheeks and moaning as quietly as he can manage. In moments he pulls off with a satisfying pop sound, sticking his tongue out as Mingyu explodes into his mouth. 

Swallowing every last bit of cum, Wonwoo looks up expectantly at Mingyu, who pulls him up into an open-mouthed kiss.

"I think I like you."

**Father:** im so hungover

**edgelord:** same

**youneedjisoos:** ugh why did i think four margaritas was a good idea

**dkay:** i cant believe we got soonyoung to drink

**kwon sinyoung:** be queit my head hurts

**edgelord:** then stop looking at your phone

**kwon sinyoung:** buti  wanna text you guys

**Divaboo:** mm fuck this shit

**Divaboo:** vernon can we order pizza

**High Quality English:** why are you asking me

**NotThe8:** junhui i wanna get my throat fucked

**fanboy:** oh dear

**fanboy:** this is why i was the designated driver !

**Hot Chinese Guy:** you were the dd for like four peope not all of us

**Hot Chinese Guy:** i had to drive home drunk wih wonwoo throwing up in my car that was not fun

**Hot Chinese Guy:** whyd we go all the way to gangnam

**Mom:** cheoollie come over

**Mom:** hold my hair bacck for me

**Garden Fairy:** not my fault

**Garden Fairy:** i just had too much to drink

**the giant:** its ok

**the giant:** youre pretty when youre throwing up too

**Garden Fairy:** thansk

**Divaboo:** aw

**Divaboo:** mingyu did you give won the dicking

**the giant:** no, i wouldnt do that in some shit club

**NotThe8:** hey!1 i picked that club because i wanted wonwoo to get fucked somewhere nice

**the giant:** i cant believe you dared him to sit on my lap

**Garden Fairy:** i am 70,000 won richer and mm

**Hot Chinese Guy:** what does mm mean

**Father:** my head hurts from looking at this chat

**NotThe8:** mm probablhy means he swallowed cum

**NotThe8:** thats what i say when i swallow

**edgelord:** gross

**kwon sinyoung:** jihooon why dont you swallow

**dkay:** I THOUGHT YOU GUYS DIDNT 

**edgelord:** we didnt soonyoung is hungover

**edgelord:** dont listen to him he's probably not thinking striaght because headache

**dkay:** suspicious

**the giant:** dont dare wonwoo to sit on my lap again

**Hot Chinese Guy:** why because it turned you on

**the giant:** yeah

**Garden Fairy:** you dont wanna be turned on by me?

**Garden Fairy:** i gav you head you selfish

**Divaboo:** ooomg wonwoo gave head

**Hot Chinese Guy:** im so proud

**Hot Chinese Guy:** mingyu is wonwoo good

**the giant:** wonwoo no thats not what i meant

**the giant:** its dumb that they made you do that though

**the giant:** also i am not answering that question

**High Quality English:** seungkwan your pizza is here

**Divaboo:** youre sitting right next to me

**High Quality English:** yeah but still

**NotThe8:** jun fuck my throat pleaaase

**NotThe8:** i want to swallow cum like wonwoo did

**the giant:** wonwoo is so good at swallowing cum

**Garden Fairy:** oh my god quiet

**youneedjisoos:** oh my jisoos*

**Hot Chinese Guy:** hong jisoo you need to be quiet

**youneedjisoos:** dont talk to your hyung like that

**the giant** started a private chat with  **Garden Fairy**

**the giant** changed  **Garden Fairy** 's name to  **Baby**

**the giant:** i think that name is more fitting

**Baby:** mayb

**Baby:** do you really like me

**the giant:** of course

**the giant:** i was definitely drunk last night but i meant what i said

**Baby:** how long

**the giant:** how long what

**Baby:** how long have you thought you liked me

**the giant:** a long time wonwoo

**Baby:** why did you never tell me

**the giant:** to be fair you never told me

**Baby:** ya

**Baby:** you make me nervous

**the giant:** in a bad way?

**Baby:** no

**Baby:** idk

**Baby:** my heaad hurts

**the giant:** im sorry

**Baby:** mm not your fault

**Baby:** i dont know what i want us to b yet

**the giant:** thats okay

**the giant:** i'll wait, just let me know

**Baby:** in the meantime.. i need a litl help

**Baby:** im sso horny

**the giant:** oh?

**the giant:** i cant exactly come over, but do you want to see something that'll help?

**Baby:** please

**the giant** sent a picture

**the giant:** imagine that im there with you baby

**Baby:** okay

**Baby:** but my fingers arent thick enough

**the giant:** holy shit wonwoo

**the giant:** do you have a toy?

**Baby:** like a dildo? 

**Baby:** nnnnnn

**Baby:** no

**Baby:** seungkwan said i should buy one with that money

**the giant:** just pretend its my fingers splitting you open baby

**Baby:** gyu

**Baby:** i drank a little more with soonyoung this morning

**Baby:** m so needy

**the giant:** a little more?

**the giant:** you sound like you had more than a little

**Baby:** im riding my fingers gyu

**Baby:** i wanna cum

**the giant:** cum for me

**the giant:** youre so pretty baby

**Baby:** aah

**Baby:** its all over m ysheets gyu

**Baby:** how do i clean itt

**the giant:** dw about it baby get some sleep

**Baby:** oh my god

**Baby:** im so sorry

**Baby:** i was drunk again i dont know what i was doing

**the giant:** its okay

**the giant:** you good now?

**Baby:** other than a pounding headache im good

**Baby:** i dont remember like half of last night

**the giant:** do you remember what we did?

**Baby:** yeah but after you said that thing it gets a little fuzzy

**Baby:** i like you too

**Baby:** a lot

**Baby:** the ive-been-pining-after-you-for-a-year sort of like

**the giant:** i feel the same way

**the giant:** we'll talk later, yeah?

**Baby** has changed  **the giant** 's name to  **gyu**

**Baby:** definitely

_ a/n; _

it is 4:12 am and i'm writing this note before i've even finished the chapter but oh my god this is so fun to write

i'm a slut for meanie guys

but its ok because jun is also a slut for meanie

i was listening to trouble by rapmonster and jin on repeat while writing the smutty part so um oops

also i was going to write about mingyu giving wonwoo a handjob too but i'll leave that to your imagination


	6. be my boyfriend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> made this a little more domestic

**Hot Chinese Guy** added  **Baby** and  **gyu** to the chat

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i need to have a serious talk with you two

 **gyu:** whats up

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you see, i was going through won's phone when he wasnt looking and

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i didnt know you guys were into sexting

 **Baby:** oh my god

 **Baby:** why the fuck were you going through my phone in the first place

 **Baby:** not to mention i was drunk and hungover at the same time

 **gyu:** uum so you saw everything?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** yeah

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** nice dick btw mingyu

 **gyu:**.

 **Baby:** fuck you junhui

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hey dont worry minghao's is nicer

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** im not gonna steal your man promise

 **Baby:** thats not the point

 **Baby:** why in the everloving fuck did you have my phone

 **gyu:** good question

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i was just curious

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i didnt expect to find dick pics

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** next time delete that shit

 **Baby:** next time dont look through my texts

 **Baby** has left the chat

 **gyu:** see now you pissed him off

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** help him finger himself and you might cheer him up

 **gyu:** what the hell

 **gyu:** did i do something?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** no

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** im just fucking pissed

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** minghao and i got into a fight and he wont answer my texts

 **gyu:** he never told me about that

 **gyu:** is that why he's sitting on my couch yelling at his phone

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** fuck, idk, probably?

 **gyu:** do you want to come talk to him

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** will he slap the shit out of me if i do

 **gyu:** dont know

 **gyu:** what the fuck even happened

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** its dumb

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** im bringing him ice cream and flowers, you should go see wonwoo when i get there

 **gyu:** kicking me out of my dorm?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** no i just

 **gyu:** its fine

 **gyu:** lmk when youre outside

 

 **gyu** started a private chat with  **Baby**

 **gyu:** are you ok

 **gyu:** im coming over

 **gyu:** jun and minghao got into a fight so theyre gonna talk

 **Baby:** okay

 **gyu** changed  **Baby** 's name to  **wonWOW**

 **wonWOW:** i hate you a lot

 **gyu:** yeah?

 **wonWOW** changed their name to  **(Mingyu's) Baby**

 **(Mingyu's) Baby:** yeah

 **gyu:** cute

 

There's an abrupt knock at the door to Mingyu and Minghao's shared dorm room, and Mingyu glances over to the younger as he rolls off the couch. "Answer it," he mutters, hiding a grin as Minghao shuffles over and opens it to find Junhui. Before he can slam the door, Jun hugs him around his waist and hands him the flowers. "What the fuck, Wen Junhui?" he screeches, despite accepting the flowers. Mingyu figures that he should probably leave, and salutes Jun before slipping past them.

The walk to Wonwoo's place takes around 15 minutes, and Mingyu is glad that it's still sixty degrees out in November. He rings the doorbell to his shared apartment, surprised when he's face to face with a stranger. They have bright mint hair, an unamused expression, and Mingyu is pretty sure he just woke the poor guy up from a nap. "Do I know you?" they eventually ask, breaking the silence. Mingyu laughs awkwardly, gesturing towards the window that he knows opens to Wonwoo's room. "Is Wonwoo here?"

"Oh, yeah," he replies, moving aside so Mingyu can enter the apartment. "I think he's in his room. I'm Min Yoongi, by the way." 

"Min Yoongi," Mingyu repeats, the name familiar on his tongue. "Aren't you friends with Jihoon?"

Yoongi brightens. "Jihoon? Yeah. We've known eachother since high school."

Mingyu nods, looking up towards the stairs. "Well, I'm gonna go see Wonwoo.."

"Of course. Nice meeting you, man."

He sprints upstairs, knocking on Wonwoo's door before cracking it open. The other man is curled up in his desk chair, a blanket around his shoulders and a thick novel between his fingers. His round glasses are perched low on the bridge of his nose, and Mingyu can't help but find him adorable. Heartbeat rising, he tiptoes closer to Wonwoo. The older hasn't noticed him yet. Mingyu leans forward in front of Wonwoo, tapping his forehead. The older jumps, letting out a noise of surprise, before blinking in relief at the realization that it's Mingyu.

"Be my boyfriend," Mingyu breathes. The words leave his mouth before he can think, and  _oh shit, what if Wonwoo isn't ready for that?_

"Okay," Wonwoo replies simply, pecking the younger on the cheek. "On one condition."

"And what's that?"

"Call me baby."

Mingyu leaned his forehead against Wonwoo's, kissing the tip of his nose. "Baby."

He moved down to his cheek, pressing a kiss to each one. "Baby."

He pecked his eyelids and removed his glasses, cracking a smile. "Baby."

"Yeah," Wonwoo breathed, smiling back. "I'll definitely be your boyfriend."

 

 **dkay** named the chat  **seokmin and the 12 hoes**

 **dkay:** hows everyone doing

 **Mom:** Are you calling me a hoe?

 **fanboy:** i thought you liked me seokmin :(

 **kwon sinyoung:** seoookkiee

 **dkay:** omgosh it was just a joke im sorry

 **dkay:** nobodys a hoe

 **(Mingyu's) Baby:** jun is a hoe

 **youneedjisoos:** wonwoo your name is the cheesiest thing ive ever seen

 **edgelord:** agreed

 **Father:** at least they're finally together

 **gyu:** finally?

 **kwon sinyoung:** i think its cute wonwoo!

 **Father** changed  **Mom** 's name to  **Seungcheol's Baby**

 **Father:** same

 **Seungcheol's Baby:** No no no

 **Divaboo:** GAG

 **Seungcheol's Baby** changed their name to  **Mother**

 **Father:** thats ok too

 **Divaboo:** ggaag

 **youneedjisoos:** stop gagging 

 **edgelord:** seungkwan are you saying this is gross or are you giving head

 **edgelord:** cant tell which one

 **(Mingyu's) Baby:** snort

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** thats my thing

 **Divaboo:** both

 **edgelord:** thats nice

 **gyu:** are you good now jun

 **NotThe8:** do you guys know how good it feels to get your throat fucked

 **(Mingyu's) Baby:** sounds like they're good

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** yeah we're good

 **fanboy:** what happened?

 **fanboy:** wait how did that happen to you minghao

 **kwon sinyoung:** well you see

 **youneedjisoos:** if you kill his innocence i swear

 **Mother:** This groupchat is gross

 **dkay:** channie jun does bad things to minghao

 **dkay:** i dont think you should ask them about it

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you make it sound like i raped him

 **gyu:** not funny

 **Father:** yeah

 **NotThe8:** it was consensual!!

 **NotThe8:** mingyu you might want to wash your couch

 **gyu:** did you actually fuck on my couch

 **Divaboo:** -grabs popcorn-

 **High Quality English:** so mingyu

 **High Quality English:** are you and wonwoo official now?

 **(Mingyu's)** **Baby:** yes

 **Divaboo:** welllll

 **Divaboo:** so are vernon and i

 **Divaboo:** he asked me out when i was puking my guts out it was hot

 **youneedjisoos:** ew

 **dkay:** so many couples

 **dkay:** im proud of you guys

 **High Quality English:** it wasnt hot

 **Divaboo:** i will nt hesitate to drop your ass

 **High Quality English:** however what you did after was pretty hot

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

 **NotThe8:** snort x2

 **kwon sinyoung:** inappropriate!

 **youneedjisoos:** you guys are nasty

 **(Mingyu's)** **Baby** changed their name to **Garden Fairy**

 **Garden Fairy:** sorry i just didnt want to become like jun and minghao

 **Garden Fairy:** remember when minghao originally named him 'hot chinese guy'

 **gyu:** oh yeah

 **NotThe8:** hey i did that right after i saw him with his shirt off

 **NotThe8:** hes hot

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** thanks haohao

 **Divaboo:** such ew

 **youneedjisoos:** cant say anything now that you and vernon are together

 **Divaboo:** yeah but we dont give each other nicknames

 **High Quality English:** wait all those times you moaned vernonie and vernon-oppa dont count?

 **dkay:** choke

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** exppOSED

 **Divaboo:** okay that was only one time

 **High Quality English:** no no

 **High Quality English:** i think it was more than once

 **Divaboo:** what about you calling me boo and kwannie

 **Father:** oh dear

 **gyu:** this is interesting

 **High Quality English** changed  **Divaboo** 's name to  **Vernon-oppa~**

 **Vernon-oppa~** changed their name to  **Divaboo**

 **Divaboo:** hey nobody fucks with my name

 **Divaboo:** like i said i will drop your ass in a second

 **High Quality English:** but then you dont get free pizza anymore

 **Divaboo:** you have a point

 **fanboy:** i cant tell if they're fighting or not

 **NotThe8:** same

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hey baby?

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah?

 **NotThe8:** yeah?

 **NotThe8:** woah wait a minute

 **Garden Fairy:** fuck sorry i thought mingyu

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** how did you get hot chinese guy and gyu mixed up

 **Garden Fairy:** my glasses arent on

 **gyu:** cute

 **edgelord:** this is kind of disgusting

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** anyways, haohao just wanted to say ily <3

 **kwon sinyoung:** wait jihoon does that mean i cant call you baby

 **dkay:** eew

 **NotThe8:** ilyt <3

 **youneedjisoos:** seokmin meet me outside the performance arts center in like 30 minutes

 **youneedjisoos:** we need to get away from these sins

 **dkay:** lets bring chan

 **fanboy:** ill be there too

 **youneedjisoos:** y'all better not do nasty things while we're gone

 

_a/n;_

call me baby, call me baby, you know my name girl

neol hyanghae keojyeogan maeuma,,,,,

im such an exo hoe

this chapter is a little short but im starting a new story so ive been focusing more on that rip


	7. seungkwan no porn in here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chap. is a lil angsty and we get to see some soonhoon :')

**dkay:** im going to jump off the roof of starbucks

 **dkay:** fuck psychology

 **dkay:** fuck college

 **dkay:** fuck getting an essay every three days

 **Garden Fairy:** hey woah its okay

 **Garden Fairy:** whats bothering you?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo the psychologist

 **NotThe8:** snort

 **dkay:** i just

 **dkay:** what the fuck is this class

 **dkay:** i thought becoming a therapist would be fun

 **edgelord:** you thought that would be fun?

 **edgelord:** jesus

 **youneedjisoos:** jisoos*

 **Garden Fairy:** is it the essay thats giving you trouble?

 **dkay:** yes

 **dkay:** im so lost

 **Garden Fairy:** hey its okay

 **Garden Fairy:** i can give you my notes?

 **dkay:** okay

 **dkay:** thank you

 **Garden Fairy** has sent a file

 **kwon sinyoung:** seokminnie dont jump off of starbucks :(

 **Garden Fairy:** study those

 **Garden Fairy:** if you need any help with the class im here

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** gag

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i h8 to say it but jeon wonwoo you will be a great psychologist

 **fanboy:** agree

 **Garden Fairy:** oh, thanks

 **Divaboo:** hey bitchbags

 **youneedjisoos:** btw seokmin you should call that guy

 **Mother:** Excuse me, Boo Seungkwan, did you just call me a bitchbag?

 **edgelord:** oh shit hes mad

 **Father:** hm

 **dkay:** what guy?

 **dkay:** the hot guy we met yesterday?

 **Divaboo:** ooo

 **youneedjisoos:** yes the hot one

 **youneedjisoos:** you got his number right

 **dkay:** yes

 **dkay:** ill talk to him after im done studying my ass off

 **Divaboo:** omg guys seokmins gonna get dicked by this guy i can smell it

 **Garden Fairy:** um

 **High Quality English:** do you wanna get dicked too seungkwan?

 **High Quality English:** also im pretty sure what you smell is something else

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** cum?

 **Divaboo:** mmh yes please dick me

 **gyu:** si g h

 **Garden Fairy:** mingyu!

 **NotThe8:** here we gooo

 **gyu:** hi baby

 **Garden Fairy:** i thought you had class

 **gyu:** im in class right now

 **gyu:** just bored

 **gyu:** besides id rather talk to you anyways

 **kwon sinyoung:** awwwwww

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** snort

 **NotThe8:** snort x2

 **youneedjisoos:** you guys are nasty

 **Garden Fairy:** can you come to my apartment after your class

 **Garden Fairy:** yoongi and namjoon arent here

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** oh shit

 **NotThe8:** mingyu be careful

 **Father:** i sense a dicking

 **Divaboo:** omg wonwoo

 **Garden Fairy:** what???

 **Garden Fairy:** that just means we can listen to kpop at full volume

 **fanboy:** omg can i come?

 **fanboy:** i can show you michael jackson

 **youneedjisoos:** chan thats probably not the best idea

 **fanboy:** wait why?

 **High Quality English:** lol this boy

 **Divaboo:** well because nobodys going to be there so..

 **kwon sinyoung:** seungkwan. if you say what i think youre going to say :)

 **edgelord:** calm down soon

 **edgelord:** also, you live with yoongi?

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah

 **edgelord:** hes a pretty cool guy

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah, i havent talked to him much

 **Garden Fairy:** i heard hes been with jimin for three years now

 **fanboy:** wait so why cant i come

 **edgelord:** theyve been together for a long time

 **edgelord:** i remember when they first met in highschool

 **gyu:** next time, chan

 **Garden Fairy:** high school? wow

 **Garden Fairy:** also mingyu does that mean youre coming

 **gyu:** mhm

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** hes already coming?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** damn mingyu that was quick

 **youneedjisoos :** oh my gosh

 **gyu:** jun ffs

 **gyu:** i will lock you out of our fucking dorm 

 **NotThe8:** hey thats punishing me too

 **NotThe8:** we can never fuck at jun's place because a bunch of freshmen live there :/

 **Garden Fairy:** those freshmen are lucky that theyve never witnessed the horror

 **fanboy:** i am blessed to not live with jun

 

 **kwon sinyoung:** jihoooniee

 **dkay:** oh my

 **Garden Fairy:** i thought you were studying

 **dkay:** i am

 **edgelord:** yes soonyoung?

 **kwon sinyoung:** you never answered my question

 **kwon sinyoung:** can i call you baby?

 **Divaboo:** ooo

 **youneedjisoos:** soonyoung you are becoming a sin

 **dkay:** hence kwon SINyoung

 **edgelord:** umm

 **edgelord:** i mean you can

 **edgelord:** just.. not a lot

 **edgelord:** i already feel short enough lol

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** this is actually kind of cute

 **Father:** ahh young love

 **kwon sinyoung:** hmm, so does that mean i can say it right now?

 **edgelord:** no

 **edgelord:** thats embarassing

 **NotThe8:** agreed

 **kwon sinyoung:** but mingyu and jun do it

 **gyu:** hey dont drag me into this

 **edgelord:** i just.. dont like it

 

 **kwon sinyoung** started a private chat with  **edgelord**

 **kwon sinyoung:** can i call you baby here?

 **edgelord:** i'll think about it

 **kwon sinyoung:** good enough for me

 **kwon sinyoung:** you'll be in the studio again right?

 **edgelord:** yeah.. i'll be here all night. im sorry

 **kwon sinyoung:** its okay, try to text me in the morning, yeah?

 **edgelord:** ill do my best

 **kwon sinyoung:** okay

 **kwon sinyoung:** hey, i love you

 **edgelord:** i love you too

 **edgelord:** bye soonyoung

 **kwon sinyoung:** bye <3

 

Soonyoung's head falls onto the desk in front of him. It's not that he doesn't want Jihoon to do what he loves, but the work hours are taking a toll on him. He hates not being able to see his boyfriend, and it makes college classes all the more stressful. In other words, Kwon Soonyoung is screwed. His hand grips the Starbucks cup to his left, lifting his head and bringing it to his lips. Caffeine doesn't do much for him anymore. 

"Hell," he mutters, laughing humourlessly. "I need Jihoon."

 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**kwon sinyoung:** hey guys!

 **fanboy:** hii soonyoung

 **fanboy:** how are you

 **kwon sinyoung:** goooodd, what about you channie~

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** this is cringey

 **gyu:** im gonna have to agree with jun

 **kwon sinyoung:** hey, thats not nice

 **fanboy:** im okay

 **fanboy:** i cant listen to michael jackson right now so :(

 **High Quality English:** guys seungkwan just called me oppa and it was hot

 **Divaboo** has left the chat

 **youneedjisoos:** oh my gosh my eyes

 **NotThe8:** i call jun oppa sometimes and boom instant boner

 **kwon sinyoung** added  **Divaboo** to the chat

 **Garden Fairy:** god as soon as seungkwan or jun show up this chat goes to shit

 **Divaboo:** WHAT THE FUCK VERNON I TOLD YOU NOT TO 

 **Divaboo:** I WAS ASLEEP OK HOW DO YOU KNOW I WAS CALLING YOU OPPA AND NOT SOMEONE ELSE

 **Father:** -grabs popcorn

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** seungkwan has wet dreams?

 **High Quality English:** because you said vernon right before you said oppa

 **High Quality English:** pretty obvious, no?

 **High Quality English:** boo?

 **Mother:** You children are disgusting

 **Mother:** Disgusting!

 **youneedjisoos:** wait jeonghan

 **youneedjisoos:** i vaguely remember you calling seungcheol oppa at a party last year..

 **kwon sinyoung:** oh my

 **NotThe8:** the expoSuRE

 **Mother:** we dont talk about that hong jisoo

 **Father:** hannie, baby, dont rip his head off

 

Wonwoo raises an eyebrow at his phone, trying not to laugh at the drama unfolding in the group chat. He doesn't understand why the word 'oppa' is such a big deal, but it still makes him wonder. He glances over at Mingyu, who's splayed on his bed clutching his phone as well. Wonwoo emits a small "Hmm" before crawling over to the taller, poking him on the forehead. Mingyu smiles at him, running the back of his hand along Wonwoo's cheek.

Taking a deep breath, the older murmurs "Oppa?" tilting his head and looking straight into his boyfriend's eyes. Something flickers, and before Wonwoo knows it he's pinned to the bed. "Don't call me that," Mingyu breathes, leaning down to graze his ear with his teeth. "I might get turned on." The older man's cheeks redden, and he wraps his arms around Mingyu's neck. 

"And what if I want you to get turned on?"

Mingyu glances down between them. "I think you've already done that."

"Oh?"

"Can I kiss you, baby?"

"Absolutely."

Wonwoo leans up first, steadying himself on his elbows before pressing a kiss to Mingyu's slightly chapped lips. He smiles as their foreheads are pushed together, leaning in for another. He lingers this time, savoring the taste of mint, lip balm, and something distinctly  _Mingyu_ that he can't quite place. The kiss is light; innocent compared to the other ones they've shared. 

Mingyu pulls away slowly, ruffling Wonwoo's hair before scooting off the mattress to plug his phone in. As he does so, Wonwoo shuffles up behind him and wraps the younger in a bear hug, arms wrapped around his waist and head barely reaching the crook of his neck. "You're so comfy, Mingyu," he laughs, scrunching his nose up cutely. Mingyu grins in response, turning around to hug him back. 

 

**Divaboo:**

vernonie how do i look in these

 **fanboy:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

 **youneedjisoos:** hOLY SHIT SEUNGKWAN GET THAT OUT OF HERE

 **Mother:** PG CHAT PG CHAT

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** SEUNGKWAN NO PORN IN HERE

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** THATS TOO MUCH EVEN FORM E

 **Divaboo:** but.. its not

 **Divaboo:** literally just my legs :(

 **Divaboo:** and i wasnt asking you guys ug

 **dkay:** OH MY GOD SEUNGKWAN WHAT IS THAT

 **High Quality English:** seungkwan holy shit

 **High Quality English:** wear those next time ok??

 **Divaboo:** okaay

 **Divaboo:** also why the fuck are all of you so against thigh highs

 **Divaboo:** fuck you all and your gender roles

 **kwon sinyoung:** those are cute seungkwan!

 **Garden Fairy:** i... i kinda like them

 **Garden Fairy:** whered you get them from?

 **NotThe8:** oh my god wonwoo 

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wheres my best friend what hav you done with him

 **youneedjisoos:** oh my gosh

 **youneedjisoos:** i just bathed in holy water sent from God

 **Father:** lol

 **Father:** whats all the commotion abt

 **Father:** its just some thigh highs

 **Mother:** Seungcheol? What

 **Mother:** I can't even look at you

 **Divaboo:**.

 **Divaboo:** thanks soon & wonwoo

 **Divaboo:** also i ordered them online

 **Garden Fairy:** oh

 **fanboy:** those those are

 **fanboy:** not good

 **fanboy:** naughty

 **kwon sinyoung:** :( is channie tainted

 **gyu:** wonwoo can i see you in those?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** GAG

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** SINCE WHEN

 **High Quality English:** ngl those are hot on his thighs

 **High Quality English:** i didnt think i would be into that shit but

 **Divaboo:** :*

 **Garden Fairy:** maybe mingyu

 **Garden Fairy:** i might try to wear something like that..

 **NotThe8:** hyperventilation

 **NotThe8:** wheres jihoon to roast everyone when we need him

 **kwon sinyoung:** hes.. working

 **kwon sinyoung:** busy

 **kwon sinyoung:** im going to bed guys bye

 **dkay:** soonyoung?

 **gyu:** is he ok?

 **Mother:** My eyes hurt..

 **fanboy:** guys is soonyoungie lonely?

 **Father:** he might be

 **Father:** ik how jihoon is

 **Father:** he wont leave the studio for another couple of days if he just started a project

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** lowkey we should surprise hiM!!

 **Garden Fairy:** you know he can see this if he checks the chat right

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** right

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** still, we gotta surprise soonyoung :^)

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i have a plan

 

_a/n;_

lonely soonyoung :(

my heart hurts

also that soft soft meanie moment MMPH

seungkwan in thigh highs is my aesthetic soooo? sorry not sorry

 


	8. by the way i sucked dick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG IVE BEEN WRITING STUFF FOR BTS FESTA AND MY FRIEND IS COMING OVER AND SHADOWHUNTERS STARTED AGAIN AHH
> 
> GUYS IF YOU WATCH SHADOWHUNTERS HIT ME UP
> 
> jfc this chapter is a meme
> 
> btw!! if you're on amino follow me BTS: saranghaetae, Carat Amino: garden fairy 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**dkay:** soooo

 **Mother:** Here we go again :'

 **dkay:** i called that hoseok guy..

 **dkay:** we met up..

 **dkay:** & he's really really nice

 **youneedjisoos:** oh nO

 **youneedjisoos:** please tell me youre not going to become like minwon and junhao

 **gyu:** wth is a minwon

 **NotThe8:** junhao?

 **NotThe8:** whys my name second :(

 **youneedjisoos:** mingyu do you know what shipping is

 **gyu:** as in like.. packages? korea post?

 **fanboy:** wait, mingyu doesnt know what shipping is?? :o

 **youneedjisoos:** no, not packages you absolute dork

 **Garden Fairy:** i dont like where this is going

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** how does your big dumb puppy boyfriend not know what shipping is

 **Garden Fairy:** did you just call my bf a big dumb puppy?

 **Garden Fairy:** bc youre not wrong

 **gyu:** hey

 **Garden Fairy:** hey

 **gyu:** if im a big dumb puppy, then youre a tiny smart kitten

 **dkay:** oh my GOD

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** GAG

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** IS THAT WHAT YOU CALL WONWOO IN BED

 **Garden Fairy:** this conversation ends now

 **youneedjisoos:** im .

 **youneedjisoos:** anyways, shipping is when you want two people to be together i guess

 **youneedjisoos:** like in bigbang i want gdragon and top to be gay for eachother

 **youneedjisoos:** and their ship name is gtop

 **gyu:**. okay wait

 **gyu:** wonwoo and i are already together so ?

 **youneedjisoos:** well i still ship it

 **youneedjisoos:** and your ship name is officially minwon

 **kwon sinyoung:** hey :(

 **kwon sinyoung:** i came up with that name, im the leader of this fanclub

 **Garden Fairy:** we have a fanclub????

 **Mother:** Jisoo, you ship gtop?

 **Mother:** That's a sin

 **Mother:** Seungri and Jiyong belong together, you hear me

 **gyu:** does anyone understand whats going on..

 **edgelord:** of course

 **edgelord:** jeonghan and soonyoung are bigbang trash

 **Father:** i know first hand how trash jeonghan is

 **Mother:** cHEOLLIE

 **Mother:** I will lock you the fuck out of our apartment if you insult my precious addiction to bigbang

 **gyu:** wait whats a bigbang

 **Father:** okay, okay, sorry dear

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** mingyu how the fuck

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** do you live under a rock

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i thought you liked kpop

 **gyu:** i do

 **Garden Fairy:** i havent showed him bigbang yet

 **NotThe8:** what about shinee

 **Garden Fairy:** are you kidding me

 **Garden Fairy:** i have to ease him into it before i show him shit like ringdingdong

 **NotThe8:** fair enough

 **dkay:** ngl im as confused as mingyu is

 **kwon sinyoung:** *dramatic inhale*

 **kwon sinyoung:** seokminnie

 **kwon sinyoung:** dont you know bigbang?? :(

 **dkay:** yeah but im still lost

**Mother:**

**Mother:** Mingyu this is the hottest man in the kpop industry

 **Mother:** His name is Kwon Jiyong and he's a rapper

 **gyu:** not bad

 **kwon sinyoung:** yoon jeonghan i think the hell not!!

**kwon sinyoung:**

**kwon sinyoung:** meet choi seunghyun, my husband

 **edgelord:** but

 **kwon sinyoung:** my second husband*

 **gyu:** not bad either

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** the question is which one would you bottom for

 **youneedjisoos:** i sense sin

 **Divaboo:** oh my god its bigbang <333

 **Divaboo:** taeyang can fuck me up anytime he wants

 **gyu:** ngl the second one

 **gyu:** i might be willing to ride him

 **Father:** lmao

 **kwon sinyoung:** in your face hannie

 **Mother:** Mingyu, you disappoint me

 **Mother:** I don't know if I can look at you anymore

 **gyu:** oh, sorry

 **Garden Fairy:** i dont know.. minho from shinee is

 **Garden Fairy:** hot

 **High Quality English:** seungkwan i see you

 **High Quality English:** im the only one thats allowed to fuck you up

 **Divaboo:** :( youre right

 **gyu:** wonwoo im hotter right

**Hot Chinese Guy:**

**Hot Chinese Guy:** good luck competing with this guy mingyu

 **NotThe8:** snort

 **Garden Fairy:** holy ssssshit

 **Divaboo:** im pretty sure wonu just got a boner

 **Divaboo:** ik i did ;)

 **High Quality English:** i can take care of that

 **youneedjisoos:** SINNERS

 **youneedjisoos:** jeonghan, please cleanse them

 **Mother:** I'm sorry but

 **Mother:** Kpop makes me weak :')

 **gyu:** how do i beat that

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you dont

 **kwon sinyoung:** wooahh minho does look good

 **dkay:** anyways i mentioned calling hoseok..

 **fanboy:** not now seokminnie

 **fanboy:** these guys are really hot :

 **youneedjisoos:** chan too? ohmy gosh

 **Garden Fairy:** i wonder if minho can body roll..

 **gyu:** i can body roll too

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** body roll?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** oh boy do i have something for you mingyu

 **Garden Fairy:** JUN

 **Garden Fairy:** i know exactly what youre fucking talking about and you better not

 **Divaboo:** JUN DO IT

 **Divaboo:** I WANT TO SEE THE LOOK ON MINGYUS FACE

 **NotThe8:** OML THE THING

 **edgelord:** what is going on

 **gyu:**??

 

 **Hot Chinese Guy** started a private chat with  **gyu**

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo's going to fucking end me

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** but im p sure this is all the porn you'll ever need

**Hot Chinese Guy:**

**Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo did a performance in freshman year and

 **gyu:** holy fucking fuck

 **gyu:** wow ok

 **gyu:** i dont know if i should thank you or ask why you have that

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i have more 

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** its used as blackmail ;)

 **gyu:** more?

**Hot Chinese Guy:**

**Hot Chinese Guy:** i'll show you the rest later

 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**gyu:** wonwoo

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **gyu:** pardon my french

 **gyu:** but how in the everloving fuck have you not grinded on me like that, like holy shit

 **gyu:** i feel attacked

 **fanboy:** wait what did wonwoo do?

 **NotThe8:** i feel bad but not really

 **Garden Fairy:** i

 **Garden Fairy:** we're not going to talk about this

 **Garden Fairy:** jun im blocking you in real life

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** <33

 **Divaboo:** wonwoo ngl that was prob the hottest thing youve ever done so 

 **Divaboo:** be proUD

 **Father:** wait a minute

 **Father:** i vaguely remember wonwoo doing a body roll when he was half drunk on stage..

 **Garden Fairy:** um um um um um um um um um um

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** LOL CHEOL

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** HOW THE HELL DO YOU REMEMBER THAT

 **Father:** i mean i was only a little stoned..

 **youneedjisoos:** i am ordering holy water for y'all

 **dkay:**! holy water

 **dkay:** oh, by the way i sucked dick

 **kwon sinyoung:** WAHT

 **NotThe8:** SNORT

 **fanboy:** OH MY GOSH SEOKMIN 

 **fanboy:** WHEN WHAT WHO WHERE WHY

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** SNORT x2

 **youneedjisoos:** SEOKMIN?

 **youneedjisoos:** LEE SEOKMIN?

 **Mother:** My head hurts

 **edgelord:** idk what to say

 **edgelord:** i thought i would get dicked before seokmin...

 **dkay:** calm

 **dkay:** i just said that to get your attention :)

 **dkay:** i met with hoseok and hes really nice and i think i might like him a tiny bit

 **kwon sinyoung:** MY SEOKKIE HAS A CRUSH

 **youneedjisoos:** i choked

 **Garden Fairy:** well then

 **youneedjisoos:** i knew he was hot but i didnt know he was that hot

 **youneedjisoos:** please dont suck his dick seokmin

 **youneedjisoos:** not yet

 **dkay:** i doubt that'll ever happen

 **dkay:** anyways.. we're going to meet up again tomorrow

 **Mother:** #proudparent

 **kwon sinyoung:** i hope you have fun

 **kwon sinyoung:** i have class, i'll bbl friends :*

 **Hot Chinese Guy** removed  **kwon sinyoung** from the chat

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** ok body rolling and dates aside

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you know how i was talking about surprising soonyoung

 **fanboy:** with jihoon?

 **fanboy:** we should do it today!

 **edgelord:** i think i can leave the studio for the rest of the day

 **edgelord:** im ahead on my project

 **gyu:** so whats the plan?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** ok

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** basically i want to throw him a little party, with all of us

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** seungcheol and i can handle booze

 **Father:** k

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** jeonghan, chan, and seungkwan, you can do decorations right

 **fanboy:** yess!!

 **Divaboo:** only if jeonghan agrees to let me do streamers this time

 **Mother:** Fine

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo youre in charge of body rolling

 **Garden Fairy:** excuse me, you fuck?

 **NotThe8:** :''''

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** jk

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** haohao, wonwoo and vernon take care of music

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** mingyu, seokmin and joshua, keep soonyoung distracted while we fuck up his dorm room

 **gyu:** great

 **High Quality English:** can i play my mixtape

 **Divaboo:** vernon if you play your mixtape our ears might bleed

 **Divaboo:** better not

 **NotThe8:** snort

 **youneedjisoos:** he's in class right now right

 **edgelord:** no, that was probably just an excuse to leave 

 **edgelord:** he doesnt have class for the rest of the day

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** jihoon, you'll come in when i text you right

 **edgelord:** right

 **gyu:** where should we take him

 **dkay:** i know where we should go

 **dkay:** theres a cafe in university village that'll cheer him up

 **Garden Fairy:** are we ready?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i think so?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** all of us should meet at his place around 3pm

 **youneedjisoos:** we should be able to get him out of there by 2:30

 **NotThe8:** perfect

 **Divaboo:** i cant wait to strangle you fucks with streamers

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** seungcheol, lets make sure everyone gets piss drunk

 

 

 

_a/n;_

if you guys didnt know, korea post is basically just a mail company in korea

soonyoung and jeonghan are bigbang trash, which makes me v happy

wonwoo is a lowkey shawol

and ohgmgt that _**EXTREMELY HOT**_  wonwoo gif, i love the fansite that took that video

i was listening to up10tion while writing this and i feel like the music im listening to affects the way i write

also did you guys see meanie at the 170604 fanmeet?? i stg they were so cute


	9. how do you make holy water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> g-dragon's album is so good, i'm in love  
> in other news, i made 200 photocards (mostly bts and svt) to put on my wall and theyre coming in later this week so i'll have to show you guys what they look like ^^  
> i apologize for this taking so long, with everything that happened with t.o.p and bts festa i didnt have the motivation/time to write this. :(
> 
> SLIGHT TRIGGER WARNING - if vomit makes you uncomfortable then i recommend skipping the part in this chapter where it shows up! i put a little asterisk to mark where it starts!

It's only 3:17 in the afternoon, and Seungkwan is already tipsy. 

He's been grinding back into Vernon for about 15 minutes now, pouting at the lack of a response. He doesn't understand how his oh-so-amazing ass isn't doing anything for his boyfriend, and he's honestly quite offended because of Vernon's indifference. Seungkwan leans back, grazing his teeth against the younger's ear and giving a sultry wink. "Vernonie, why aren't you  _excited_?"

Vernon chokes back a laugh, shaking his head at Seungkwan's attempt to be sexy. "Because," he replies, slowly pushing him away. "I'm here to cheer up Soonyoung and blow everyone away with my mixtape. If you're patient, I might touch you later."

"Touch me? Why don't you fu-" Seungkwan is interrupted by Minghao placing his palm over his mouth, shaking his head and throwing Vernon a glare. "No sinning when Joshua isn't here. Soonyoung will be here in ten minutes."

Seungkwan raises an eyebrow at Minghao, pushing his hand away. "But you and Jun always fuck at parties, why can't Vernon and I?"

Junhui throws Seungkwan a look from across the room, gesturing towards the phone in his hand. "I can hear you from all the way over here, Kwannie, and I need to call Soonyoung. Shut the fuck up." Seungkwan silently cringes at Jun's use of the nickname 'Kwannie', but turns back to Vernon and runs his fingers along his biceps. "'M gonna finish throwing these streamers all over the place, and then we can talk about you  _touching_ me." He turns on his heel and makes his way towards the kitchen, subtly swaying his hips with the knowledge that Vernon is watching him.

 

 **gyu** has started a private chat with  **Garden Fairy**

 **gyu:** we'll be there in like 6 mins

 **Garden Fairy:** cool

 **Garden Fairy:** the party playlist consists of shinee, bigbang, vixx, and whatever dumb shit vernon puts in

 **gyu:** bless

 **gyu:** i need some lucifer and bangbangbang in my life

 **Garden Fairy:** yes

 **Garden Fairy:** also seungkwan has been trying to get in vernons pants for at least 30 minutes

 **gyu:** why am i not surprised

 **Garden Fairy:** its not like seungkwan is a hoe or anything

 **Garden Fairy:** totally not a hoe

 **gyu:** totally

 **gyu:** not gonna lie though as soon as i start drinking i'll be trying to get into your pants

 **Garden Fairy:** fun

 **Garden Fairy:** i dont think i mind, though?

 **gyu:** good to know

 **gyu:** maybe you can stay at my place tonight

 **Garden Fairy:** maybe

 **gyu:** we're here, tell everyone to turn off the lights and stfu

 **Garden:** k

 

Wonwoo throws his phone somewhere on the couch, clapping his hands in an attempt to get everyone's attention. "They're here!" he yells, eyeing a very loud Seungkwan. "Shut the hell up and hide." He quickly sprints to turn off the lights, and jumps behind the loveseat next to the TV. After a minute or so of waiting, everyone's silent, and a curious Joshua opens the door. Soonyoung is behind him, gaze obviously downcast, dark bags under his eyes. Seokmin and Mingyu follow after them, arms around Soonyoung's shoulders as they stop him in front of the doorway. Jeonghan screams "Surprise!" and Wonwoo jumps up from behind the couch, looking around the room as Seungcheol triggers a party popper. Soonyoung's eyes are wide, face falling for a millisecond as he realizes Jihoon isn't there. He cocks his head, grinning at all of his friends.

"What's all this for? It's not my birthday, right?"

Seokmin pats his back, gesturing towards Jun. "Nope. We just did this because we love you, Jun set it all up."

"Hey," Chan giggles, throwing a pointed glare in Seokmin's direction. "We all helped. Surprise, Soonyoungie."

Soonyoung bows, silently thanking them for throwing the party. After a moment he chuckles, pointing towards his kitchen counter. "Let's get started! Booze?" The lot of them share a laugh, Jun listing off the various (probably toxic) alcohol bottles he bought with Seungcheol an hour earlier. Minghao turns the current VIXX song up to full volume, hesitantly bopping his head along to Shangri-La. Wonwoo then turns his attention to Mingyu, shuffling over and wrapping their fingers together. "Hey," he murmurs, looking up at his boyfriend. Mingyu smiles, canines poking out from beneath his lip, and leans down to plant a kiss on the top of Wonwoo's head. "Hey, Wonwow." Wonwoo slaps him lightly on the arm, rolling his eyes at the use of the name. 

 

 **Hot Chinese Guy** has started a private chat with  **edgelord**

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** come in

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** your boyfriend looks depressed as fuck

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** he's in the kitchen

 **edgelord:** comin

 

Jihoon inches his way through Soonyoung's door, flinching at the volume of the music. Streamers and balloons are strewn across the floor and furniture, and the atmosphere is an overall mess. He nods to Joshua as he points towards the kitchen, tiptoeing in the direction of Soonyoung. He hasn't seen him in days, and Jihoon is pretty sure he's going to cry when he sees him. As he rounds the corner he finds his boyfriend leaning against the counter, shoulders slumped but smiling nonetheless. Jihoon's heart rate doubles, and he taps Soonyoung on the shoulder to get his attention. He turns around, mouth falling open when he sees Jihoon. "I missed you," Jihoon mumbles, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's neck and standing on his tippy toes. At this point, all thirteen of them are crammed into the tiny kitchen, all of them cooing at the sight of the two. Soonyoung tries to speak, opening and closing his mouth at least three times. He finally wraps his arms around Jihoon's torso, squeezing him tight.

Soonyoung whispers Jihoon's name, and Jihoon's pretty sure his heart breaks at the sound. He sounds so broken, so  _sad,_ and all Jihoon wants to do is hug him until the end of time. The song playing is distant in his ears- he's pretty sure it's BIGBANG, and the soft voices of his friends are watery in his ears. All he can focus on is Soonyoung, and how much he loves him. Jihoon wipes away his boyfriend's stray tears, eyes widening when he realizes he started crying as well. He buries his face in Soonyoung's chest, letting a single sob rack through his body before lifting his head. He doesn't remember the last time he cried, probably when he was a teenager, but the sight of Soonyoung is enough to throw him over the edge. After what feels like hours of resting in Soonyoung's arms, they're interrupted by Jeonghan not-so-subtly coughing, completely ruining the moment. The two break apart, soft smiles on their faces, with the silent promise of more hugs later. 

"This is adorable and all," Jeonghan begins, arms crossed. "But I really want to get shitfaced." 

Sending a friendly glare in his direction, Jihoon untangles himself from Soonyoung's grip. 

"Fine, but you don't get to drink all the vodka, you shithead."

 

 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**gyu:** hey has anyone seen vernon and kwan

 **Father:** well

 **Father:** i havent seen them, but i definitely heard them

 **NotThe8:** "ohh dadddy"

 **gyu:**. wonderful

 **youneedjisoos:** disgus ting

 **Father:** so im like 99% sure theyre fucking

 **NotThe8:** lol prob

 **gyu:** does seungkwan actually call vernon daddy?

 **youneedjisoos:** ick

 **NotThe8:** i think so

 **NotThe8:** but hey no kinkshaming

 **Father:** tbh youre probably the kinkiest one here minghao

 **NotThe8:** prob

 **gyu:**?? you guys are standing next to eachother why texting

 **Father:** good question

 

 *****  Clinging to Mingyu's side, Wonwoo lets giggles tumble out of his mouth. He's had somewhere around four beers, a couple shots of vodka, and a cup of questionable red liquid, so it's safe to say he's drunk. He drops to his knees, nuzzling the side of Mingyu's leg before crawling around to the front of his body. At this point, Wonwoo doesn't care that half of his friends can see what he's doing. He claws at his boyfriend's thighs, looking up at him with a suggestive smile. 

"Gyuu, let me please you."

Mingyu raises an eyebrow at the older male, ruffling his hair instead of forming a reply.  _And I thought I would be the one trying to fuck him._ His boyfriend is obviously drunk, and is probably going to be sick soon. Wonwoo can never hold his alcohol. He lifts Wonwoo off the floor, carrying him bridal style in the direction of the bathroom. He shoots Jun a look on the way, rolling his eyes when he gives Mingyu a thumbs-up. He toes open the bathroom door as quickly as possible, setting Wonwoo down on the cool tile. He pecks his forehead before holding his hair back and making him lean over the toilet, rubbing soothing circles over his back. "Throw up."

He looks away as Wonwoo starts coughing, spluttering before emptying the contents of his stomach into the toilet bowl. Mingyu covers his nose in an attempt to dispel the rancid smell of mixed alcohol and stomach acid filling the bathroom. He's glad that he got him to the bathroom in time, or else this would be happening all over his brand new shoes. Once Wonwoo finishes puking his guts out, Mingyu hastily flushes the toilet and runs his fingers through his hair, standing up to grab a washcloth and dampen it. He pats down Wonwoo's face with the washcloth, wiping any excess vomit from the corners of his lips. 

"Let's go sit down in the living room, okay?"

Wonwoo sighs and rubs his forehead, mumbling out an "okay," before making grabby hands at Mingyu. *

The taller chuckles, leaning down to pick up his still wasted boyfriend and carrying him with ease back towards the party. He sits Wonwoo down on the couch, asking Seokmin to keep an eye on him while he grabs a bottle of water. He passes Minghao in the kitchen, who salutes him before turning back to Jun. Mingyu looks away before he has to witness Minghao and Jun making out, grabbing a freezing cold bottle of water and almost sprinting out of the room. When he returns to the couch, Wonwoo is snuggled into a pillow, eyes drooping and face pale. Mingyu settles next to him, pressing the bottle to his forehead and running his fingers down Wonwoo's cheek. Wonwoo looks up at him with something irrevocably warm in his eyes.

Mingyu doesn't want to know what it means yet.

 

 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**Divaboo:** mornning!

 **youneedjisoos:** wth seungkwan its 7:30 in the morning

 **youneedjisoos:** arent you hungover

 **High Quality English:** hes definitely sick as fuck

 **High Quality English:** im sure his ass hurts too

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** tmi

 **dkay:** n a s t y

 **gyu:** anyone seen soonyoung and jihoon?

 **dkay:** im sure theyre cuddling or something gross

 **NotThe8:** gag

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wait but hao you dont have a gag reflex

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i would know

 **fanboy:** oh my..

 **youneedjisoos:** chan dont mind them

 **Divaboo:** ok but lets b honest how many of us fucked last night

 **Mother:** Guilty!

 **youneedjisoos:** gasp

 **NotThe8:** very quilty

 **NotThe8:** guilty*

 **dkay:** if only you were quilty

 **Father:** kek

 **gyu:** not guilty? 

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** psh dont lie

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i know what you and wonwoo do when he's drunk

 **gyu:** well seeing as he got sick like 8 times, i didnt quite have the chance

 **Garden Fairy:** :/ shame

 **fanboy:** are you okay wonwoo??

 **Mother:** Wonnuu, you should've let me take care of you

 **Mother:** I make some kickass soup ;(

 **Father:** this is a truth

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah well

 **NotThe8:** cough he prefers mingyu

 **Divaboo:** obvi ;)

 **youneedjisoos:** stop tortuting the kid

 **Garden Fairy:** we're the same age

 **youneedjisoos:** ah ah ah, im your hyung

 **youneedjisoos:** i was born 6 months earlier

 **Garden Fairy:** i guess so

 **Garden Fairy:** sorry han but mingyu is better

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** shots f i r e d

 **NotThe8:** pew pew pew

 **High Quality English:** wowza

 **gyu:** ilyt woo

 **Garden Fairy:** <3

 **fanboy:** did wonwoo hyung just send a heart?

 **youneedjisoos:** and he let mingyu call him woo?

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wooah woah woah

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** this is not fair

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** he never lets me call him woo, he says it sounds like a fire alarm

 **NotThe8:** weewooweewooweewooweewoo

 **Garden Fairy:** it does

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** but?

 **Mother:** I'm offended

 **Mother:** Seungcheol, let's go shopping

 **Father:** but my wallet is like.. empty

 **Garden Fairy:** its cute when mingyu says it

 **Mother:** Your wallet may be empty, but is your bank account?

 **Mother:** Please, Cheollie?

 **Mother:** I'll give you a surprise

 **Divaboo:** ooo

 **High Quality English:** aka he'll give you head

 **Father:** i mean

 **Father:** how can i say no

 **gyu:** wonwoo did you call me cute

 **gyu:** i think not

 **NotThe8:**!

 **Garden Fairy:** what do you mean?

 **gyu:** youre cute

 **gyu:** im not

 **gyu:** im a giraffe

 **Garden Fairy:** giraffes are cute

 **youneedjisoos:** this is oddly domestic

 **dkay:** bless

 **dkay:** but giraffes have weird tongues and shit

 **gyu:** guess that explains why im so good at eating fairies out

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** LOL

 **youneedjisoos:** STOP

 **youneedjisoos:** MISSION ABORT

 **fanboy:** SEOKMINNIE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

 **fanboy:** MINGYU EATS FAIRIES THIS IS BAD!

 **NotThe8:** oh my

 **NotThe8:** not the kind of fairy youre thinking of chan

 **High Quality English:** not the kind of eating he's thinking of either

 **Garden Fairy:** fairies?

 **Garden Fairy:** there's more than one fairy now?

 **gyu:** no no no

 **Divaboo:** WOW

 **Divaboo:** exxposeedddd?

 **fanboy:** wait theres more than one kind of fairy?

 **fanboy:** im confused

 **dkay:** we're not having this conversation channie :(

 **dkay:** ill tell you later

 **gyu:** wonwoo

 **Garden Fairy:** i want to know who this other fairy is

 **gyu:** no baby no

 **gyu:**  its just you

 **gyu:** no other fairies promise

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** when mingyu is wrapped around wonwoos finger

 **Garden Fairy:** aha

 **Garden Fairy:** i was kiddng gyu

 **NotThe8:** o my!

 **gyu:** dont scare me

 **Garden Fairy:** i can hear your heartbeat from over here

 **gyu:** you're literally laying on my chest

 **Garden Fairy:** do you have a medical issue? i swear its over 120 bpm

 **gyu:** probably

 **youneedjisoos:** eeew

 **High Quality English:** even seungkwan and i dont do that mushy shit

 **Divaboo:** you lie

 **High Quality English:** no

 **Divaboo:** mmhm

 **NotThe8:** oh?? so vernon cuddles seungkwan ;)

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** prob

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** who wouldnt cuddle seungkwan

 **NotThe8:** hey whats that supposed to mean

 **Garden Fairy:** mingyu

 **gyu:** mm?

 **Garden Fairy:** how do you make holy water

 **youneedjisoos:** you consult HONG JISOOS

 **gyu:** uh idk, google it?

 **Garden Fairy:** what the fuck

 **Garden Fairy:** youre supposed to say how

 **gyu:** how

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i sense a dad joke

 **NotThe8:** brace yourselves

 **Garden Fairy:** you boil the hell out of it

 **Divaboo:** SNORT

 **Divaboo:** IM-

 **dkay:** LEAVE WONWOO

 **High Quality English:** dear god please end it all

 **NotThe8:** why are we friends with him

 **gyu:** guys he started laughing really hard

 **gyu:** what am i supposed to do

 **gyu:** hes fucking wheezing

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** why dont you just

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** boil the hell out of him

 

_a/n;_

LISTEN TO G DRAGON'S ALBUM

i was listening to shinhwa for the first time in a while and woww

4'oclock by RM and V is also very good!!

 


	10. high quality mario kart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this in the timespan of two hours wow  
> also i just discovered halsey's new album and holy heck it's really good
> 
> wonwoo is a whore for mingyu pass it on

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**NotThe8:** guys

 **NotThe8:** breaking news

 **NotThe8:** jun is fucking amazing with his tongue

 **youneedjisoos:** thats great

 **youneedjisoos:** now stop fucking talking abt it

 **NotThe8:** no but srsly

 **NotThe8:** i came so hard

 **dkay:** ffs

 **Divaboo:** im crying

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** yeah you did

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** all over my chest

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** was hot

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you guys wanna see?

 **youneedjisoos:** NO

 **Mother:** NO

 **Father:** no thanks

 **Divaboo:** NO

 **NotThe8:** im offended?

 **dkay:** i dont want your porno

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** :(

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wheres wonwow and mingayu

 **Garden Fairy:** busy

 **Mother:** Oh damn?

 **Mother:** Wonwoo's getting it ;))

 **NotThe8** changed  **Garden Fairy** 's name to  **Giving Head**

 **NotThe8:** i bet 10,000 won he's sucking mingyu

 **edgelord:** um

 **edgelord:** i bet 20,000 lol

 **fanboy:**??

 **kwon sinyoung:** dw about it chani~ <3

 **fanboy:** okay

 **youneedjisoos:** tbh i'm sure he is

 **youneedjisoos:** dont want to think about it though :"

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** he hasnt even changed his name back yet :0

 **NotThe8:** tru

 **NotThe8:** wonu come back or else i'll make it worse

 **gyu:** dont fucking interrupt him

 **gyu:** jesus fuck

 **gyu** changed  **Giving Head** 's name to  **Garden Fairy**

 **High Quality English:** my bet is on head

 **Divaboo:** same

 **Divaboo:** vernonie, you want head too?

 **Father:** well then

 **dkay:** ssssigh

 **High Quality English:** i mean, hell yeah

 **High Quality English:** but how are you going to do that when we're in the middle of music theory

 **youneedjisoos:** dont encourage him???

 **Divaboo:** i have my ways

 **Divaboo:** hopefully the guy sitting next to you wont mind

 **youneedjisoos:** are you actually

 **Father:** getting head in the middle of class

 **Father:** i love when that happens

 **Mother:** oh my GOD IT WAS ONCE

 **NotThe8:** wait ur telling me jeonghan has given you head in class

 **fanboy:** im scarred :''''''

 **kwon sinyoung:** o boy, hide chan

 **Father:** oh yes, of course

 **Father:** i wish it was more than once though

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i think im more scarred

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i sprinted across the fuckin block to wonwoo's apartment and

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i opened the door bc it was unlocked

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** i didnt know wonwoo was a screamer

 **edgelord:** lmaaao

 **NotThe8:** LOL WAIT

 **NotThe8:** WHATS HAPPENING

 **Mother:** Stop stp stopsospso sptops

 **Father:** rip

 **Father:** why is everyone getting laid except me :/

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** tbh im not going to interrupt whatever the fuck they're doing

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** wonwoo has like 600 kinks im scared

 **NotThe8:** omf please

 **NotThe8:** if you interrupt them i'll call you daddy for a week

 **NotThe8:** anywhere

 **NotThe8:** including in public

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** you will?

 **youneedjisoos:** im 

 **youneedjisoos:** why am i friends with y'all

 **NotThe8:** yes

 **NotThe8:** i promise daddy

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** it suddenly went quiet

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** im going in

 **dkay:** it sounds like youre about to penetrate some1

 **NotThe8:** snort

 **youneedjisoos:** fuck this shit im out

 **youneedjisoos** has muted the chat

 **fanboy** has muted the chat

 **dkay** has muted the chat

 **Mother:** :(

 **Mother:** There goes my innocent children

 **kwon sinyoung:** im still here!

 **Mother:** Seokminnie told me about what you did with Jihoon 

 **Mother:** I am not conviNCED

 **edgelord:** hey with all the shit you do

 **edgelord:** its not that bad

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** OIFEIUBWIDBFIWBSDFHALSFHWQOSLK

 **Hot Chinese Guy:** THEYRE FFUCKING PISSED AND MY EYES ARE BURNING

 **Hot Chinese Guy** changed their name to  **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN**

 **edgelord:** wtf

 **edgelord:** arent those the lyrics to the song yoongi produced with his friends

 **edgelord:** how do you even know that exists

 **Father:** i fear for his life

 **NotThe8:** o no

 **NotThe8:** if he dies then who's gonna fuck me

 **gyu:** what in the everloving fuck is wrong with you guys

 **gyu:** i was trying to enjoy some nice, high quality mario kart with my boyfriend

 **gyu:** but no

 **Garden Fairy:** ((((((:

 **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN:** THAT IS A FUCCKING LIE

 **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN:** IS MARIO KART CODEWORD FOR GETTING HEAD

 **gyu:** okay well you see

 **gyu:** its all wonwoo's fault

 **Father:** this is interesting

 **Garden Fairy:** what

 **Garden Fairy:** you're the one who said that if i sucked your dick and still won the game you'd pay me 

 **NotThe8:** I WAS RIGHT?

 **NotThe8:** pay up boys

 **edgelord:** i think not

 **edgelord:** i bet 20,000, you only bet 10,000

 **edgelord:** pay up minghao

 **gyu:** you bet on him giving me head??

 **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN:** WONWOO IS A WHORE FOR MONEY CONFIRMED

 **Mother:** I'm still not over the fact that Mingyu would pay his own boyfriend for that

 **Mother:** He can't be that good ;)

 **gyu:** i beg to differ

 **Garden Fairy:** i mean no

 **Garden Fairy:** im not a whore for money

 **Garden Fairy:** im a whore for mingyu

 **NotThe8:** SNORT

 **Mother:** Snort x2

 **kwon sinyoung:** ahhhhhh :(

 ** **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN:**** SNORT x900

 **** ** **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN:**** wonwoo we all knew that already

 **gyu:** wait so you're saying i didn't have to pay you to do that

 **Garden Fairy:** what no

 **Garden Fairy:** why would you have to pay me

 **Garden Fairy:** maybe i just wanted an excuse to give you head

 **gyu:** bless

 **gyu:** in that case..

 **Mother:** Aren't you guys in the same room

 **gyu:** yes?

 **Mother:** Why don't you talk irl instead of polluting the chat ;')

 **Garden Fairy:** yes mom

 **gyu:** i'll pollute wonwoo instead

 **Garden Fairy:**...

 **Garden Fairy** be gentle

 **edgelord:** christ

 

 

****wonwoo wants mingyu's cock** **

****Garden Fairy:**** i have a dilemma

 **Divaboo:** i also have a dilemma

 **Divaboo:** you first

 **NotThe8:** spicy

 **Garden Fairy:** well you see

 **Garden Fairy:** i cant walk

 **Garden Fairy:** i think you can guess why

 **** ** **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN:**** did mingyu "pollute" you

 **** **** ** **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN:**** poor wonwoo

 **NotThe8:** i know the feel

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah so what do i do

 **NotThe8** changed  ** **** ** **DASI RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN****** 's name to  **Papi**

 **Divaboo:** i wish i could help but idk

 **NotThe8:** just get mingyu to carry you everywhere

 **Divaboo:**! good idea

 **Divaboo:** he skipped music theory to fuck you so i think he'd be willing to be a slave

 **Papi:** or do what minghao does 

 **Papi:** whine and moan until i buy him food and cuddle his ass ;)

 **NotThe8:** pft i dont do that

 **Garden Fairy:** i might have to do both of those things

 **Garden Fairy:** i literally

 **Garden Fairy:** tried to get up and fell face-first into the carpet

 **Papi:** snort

 **Papi:** i really hope mingyu laughed at you

 **Garden Fairy:** hey fuck you

 **Garden Fairy:** but he did

 **Garden Fairy:** now he won't let me get out of bed

 **NotThe8:** o my

 **Divaboo:** so i also have an issue

 **NotThe8:** spill the tea

 **Divaboo:** half of the people in music theory know i gave vernon the succ

 **Divaboo:** also while sucking his dick i realized that i think i love him

 **Divaboo:** which is spooky :(

 **Papi:** aw is seungkwannie in love

 **Garden Fairy:** that is scary

 **NotThe8:** i'd tell him how you feel tbhhh

 **NotThe8:** ik he cares abt u

 **Papi:** agree

 **Divaboo:** really?

 **Divaboo:** idk tho because we mostly just do sex stuff

 **Divaboo:** and cuddle

 **Divaboo:** and eat pizza together

 **NotThe8:** ya, you should tell him

 **Divaboo:** okaay

 **Papi:** what about you wonwoo

 **Papi:** have you and minGAYu said ily yet

 **Papi:** in real life

 **Garden Fairy:** well no

 **Garden Fairy:** idk about that yet

 **Garden Fairy:** we've only been dating for as long as seungkwan and vernon so

 **Garden Fairy:** it's still too early imo

 **NotThe8:** bbut you've liked him since sophomore year no?

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah but

 **Garden Fairy:** im still not sure, its a big step

 **Papi:** do you trust him

 **Garden Fairy:** yes

 **Papi:** do you get lonely without him?

 **Garden Fairy:** kinda

 **Papi:** do you get butterflies when he hugs you?

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah

 **Papi:** then its safe to say you love him

 **Divaboo:** i agree

 **Divaboo:** if im doing it, you should do it wonu

 **NotThe8:** also do you get hard in like .5 seconds when he kisses you

 **Garden Fairy:**.

 **NotThe8:** b honest

 **Garden Fairy:** obviously

 **NotThe8:** pls confess to him

 **Papi:** ^^

 **Garden Fairy:** maybe

 

 

_a/n;_

wowza!

idek what this chapter was, i just felt like writing

thanks for reading <3


	11. mingyu wants that sweet ass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay but did you guys HEAR SEOKMIN ABSOLUTELY SLAY THAT COVER  
> also its fathers day when im writing this, you're the best dad seungcheol  
> im really sad abt produce 101, samuel and jonghyun deserved more  
> samuel's going to have his solo debut soon though and im hype
> 
> enjoy

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**High Quality English:** my pores have disappeared

 **High Quality English:** the sun is shining

 **High Quality English:** my student debt is clear

 **High Quality English:** what a nice day

 **dkay:**?? wht

 **youneedjisoos:** what happened to you

 **youneedjisoos:** did seungkwan give you oral?

 **NotThe8:** ack

 **youneedjisoos:** nvm, dont answer that 

 **High Quality English:** no no, something better

 **Papi:** oh, he let you fuck his thighs again?

 **Divaboo:** guys wttfffff

 **Divaboo:** i told him i love him

 **Garden Fairy:** i see

 **NotThe8:** aww

 **Mother:** Wait, so you guys aren't being nasty for once?

 **Mother:** I'm so proud <3

 **High Quality English:** all im saying is

 **High Quality English:** ive been blessed

 **fanboy:** awwe :)

 **fanboy:** you guys are so cuteee

 **kwon sinyoung:**! agree

 **kwon sinyoung:** hoonie, do you love me?

 **edgelord:** no 

 **kwon sinyoung:** :(

 **edgelord:** soonyoung i literally tell you ily every day

 **NotThe8:** snort

 **Papi:** wait so my dear baby kwan told vernon he loves him

 **Papi:** im sO prOuD

 **Father:** woah wait the fuck

 **Father:** im the only dad here

 **Father:** who in the hell

 **Papi:** its jun ;)

 **Papi:** also that is not true! i am xu minghao's daddy

 **gyu:** cough

 **Garden Fairy:** cough

 **Divaboo:** cough?

 **Father:** hey now

 **Father:** change your name b4 i give you a beating

 **Papi:** yes father

 **Papi** changed their name to  **WONWOW**

 **youneedjisoos:** whats with the goddamn coughing, you got a cold?

 **fanboy:** woah

 **dkay:** savageshua alert

 **dkay:** hide your kids hide your wife :*

 **Garden Fairy:** wen junhui change your name rn

 **Garden Fairy:** you piece of shit

 **WONWOW:** i think not!

**Garden Fairy:**

**NotThe8:** um

 **High Quality English:** did he just use a meme or

 **WONWOW:** im 

 **WONWOW:** im shook

 **Garden Fairy:**??

 **Garden Fairy:** whats wrong

 **Mother:** I mean to be fair

 **Mother:** You usually just use dad jokes </3

 **Divaboo:** and they're so unfunny that i actually have to take a moment

 **Garden Fairy:** :(

 **gyu:** hey

 **gyu:** dont insult his jokes ok

 **edgelord:** dont tell me you actually think they're funny

 **gyu:** i mean they are sometimes

 **WONWOW:** yeah, wonwoo

 **WONWOW:** he's a keeper

 **WONWOW:** pls marry & have 18 kids

 **Garden Fairy:**.. but i can't have kids?

 **NotThe8:** you can dream :'

 **fanboy:** im so confused

 **kwon sinyoung:** its okay channie

 **kwon sinyoung:** so am i

 **Father:** well, thats just because ur dumb

 **kwon sinyoung:** hey, stop the harrassment :(

 **youneedjisoos:** s i g h

 **youneedjisoos:** y'all need the bible ok

 **youneedjisoos:** would you like me to read a passage

 **Divaboo:** no

 **WONWOW:** no

 **High Quality English:** no

 **Mother:** Please enlighten us! :)

 **dkay:** oh dear

 **youneedjisoos:** see, jeonghan is willing to accept jisoos christ

 **youneedjisoos:** i've been blessed

 **edgelord:** whatever you say

 

**wonWOAH**

**gyu:** hey, how you doin lil mama let me whisper in your ear

 **Garden Fairy:**??

 **gyu:** lmao

 **gyu:** hows class

 **Garden Fairy:** boring

 **Garden Fairy:** i have 30 mins left ;/

 **gyu:** mm..

 **gyu:** meet me in the bathrooms when you're done?

 **Garden Fairy:** why the bathrooms

 **gyu:** fucc

 **Garden Fairy:** OH

 **gyu:** yeah

 **gyu:** my next class is in two hours so we have some time

 **Garden Fairy:** good

 **gyu:** eager?

 **Garden Fairy:** fuck yes

 **gyu:** how eager

 **Garden Fairy:** i literally want you to pound into me so hard that i cant walk

 **Garden Fairy:** please & thank you

 **gyu:** damn

 **gyu:** im not opposed to that idea

 **gyu:** in the bathroom tho?

 **Garden Fairy:** yes

 **gyu:** & if someone walks in?

 **Garden Fairy:** don't care

 **Garden Fairy:** you're the one that suggested the bathroom in the first place

 **gyu:** right

 **Garden Fairy:** nobody needs to know right

 **gyu:** wont tell a soul

 **gyu:** you're too pretty bent over

 **gyu:** im the only one that gets to know about it 

 **Garden Fairy:** you're cringey

 **gyu:** ik

 **Garden Fairy:** i love you

 **gyu:** i love you too baby

 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**youneedjisoos:**

**youneedjisoos:**

**youneedjisoos:**

**Mother:** What the fuck happened to you Joshua

 **Mother:** Did you lose your bible again??

 **youneedjisoos:** worse

 **WONWOW:** he prob saw porn

 **youneedjisoos:** worse

 **NotThe8:** straight porn?

 **youneedjisoos:** worse

 **dkay:** got the succ?

 **youneedjisoos:** worse

 **gyu:**...

 **youneedjisoos:** GET OUT OF HERE YOU SICK MOTHERUFCKER

 **Divaboo:** woAH

 **fanboy:** he's mad!!

 **gyu:** its not my fault

 **gyu:** you're the one that investigated

 **WONWOW:**??????????

 **NotThe8:** snort?

 **youneedjisoos:** I

 **youneedjisoos:** HEARD WONWOO SCREAMINF I THOUGHT HE WAS DYING

 **High Quality English:** oh, i see

 **WONWOW:** LOL

 **NotThe8:** YOU SAW THEM FUCKING?

 **Father:** christ

 **edgelord:** im so sorry jisoo

 **Garden Fairy:** kim mingyu

 **Garden Fairy:** you told me nobody would find out

 **gyu:** i didn't expect joshua to appear out of nowhere

 **Divaboo:** were you guys fucking in a bathroom or smth??

 **Garden Fairy:**.

 **gyu:**.

 **NotThe8:** LOL

 **Mother:** DISGUSTING

 **WONWOW:** WONWOO I CANT-

 **kwon sinyoung:** hi guys!

 **kwon sinyoung:** what's wrong :(

 **edgelord:** ffs soonyoung

 **edgelord:** read the chat

 **Garden Fairy:** leaf me alone

 **NotThe8:** i mean? if you were screaming it musta been good

 **Divaboo:** yeah, did he give you the good fucc?

 **youneedjisoos:** dOES NOBODY CARES abT mY MENTaL STAtE

 **WONWOW:** no

 **WONWOW:** im just happy my dear wonu is finally getting some

 **gyu:** he's getting more than some

 **Garden Fairy:** mINGYU

 **NotThe8:** jun, can i also get some?

 **NotThe8:** throat fucking mayb?

 **WONWOW:** you don't even need to ask

 **dkay:** gags

 **fanboy:** im loWkeY scared

 **kwon sinyoung:** y'all are scaring the maknae 

 **gyu:** wonwoo can we please get back to what we were doing

 **Mother:** N a s t i e s

 **WONWOW:** mingyu wants that sweet ass

 **gyu:** how do you know what his ass looks like

 **WONWOW:** we're best friends

 **gyu:** and?

 **NotThe8:** stop making him jealous and come fuck me instead :(

 **Garden Fairy:** ug

 **Garden Fairy:** fine

 **youneedjisoos:** im never going into that bathroom again

 

_a/n;_

this is kind of a filler ngl

i don't know where i want this story to go, feel free to give me ideas or something

thanks for reading ^


	12. please fuck me - love, jeon wonwoo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor wonwoo  
> always getting finessed by jun  
> istg
> 
> *cries in estonian* did you guys see the pictures of meanie and jeongcheol pledis put on the instagram
> 
> I HAVE 420 KUDOS ON THIS STORY RIGHT NOW WOW BLESS

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**Garden Fairy** changed  **gyu** 's name to **Giant** **Baby**

 **NotThe8:** lol?

 **Garden Fairy:**. mingyu

 **Garden Fairy:** i cant believe you cried watching pocahontas

 **Giant Baby:** hey, fuck off

 **Giant Baby:** that one scene just gets to me ok

 **Garden Fairy:**.. you started crying at the title screen

 **Father:** lmfao

 **fanboy:** there's a korean sub version of pocahontas??

 **Giant Baby:** that's besides the point

 **Giant Baby:** if you don't shut up i'll tell them abt the bookstore incident

 **WONWOW:** oh???

 **Garden Fairy:** um

 **Garden Fairy:** what bookstore

 **Garden Fairy:** i dont know what you're talking about

 **Garden Fairy:** i don't even read

 **Garden Fairy:** haha

 **Garden Fairy** left the chat

 **High Quality English:** damn mingyu

 **Divaboo:** what the hell did you do to him in a bookstore

 **youneedjisoos:** s i n

**WONWOW** started a private chat with  **Giant Baby**

 **WONWOW:** what happened in a bookstore?

 **Giant Baby:** mm nothing

**WONWOW:**

****

**WONWOW:**

****

**WONWOW:**

**WONWOW:** ;) tell me

 **Giant Baby:** ,

 **Giant Baby:** how the fuck do you have so many pictures of my bf being a hoe

 **WONWOW:** that's for me to know and you to dwell over

 **WONWOW:** tell me

 **Giant Baby:** ,, fine

 **Giant Baby:** you know the shitty ass campus bookstore right

 **WONWOW:** riight

 **Giant Baby:** so we were trying to find textbooks obviously

 **Giant Baby:** but as soon as we got to the back of the store

 **Giant Baby:** he fucking leaned against the wall and pulled his sweater down

 **WONWOW:** fioadhidbfaisfh hOE

 **Giant Baby:** no no

 **Giant Baby:** then he cranes his neck and is like

 **Giant Baby:** "i'm horny, oppa"

 **Giant Baby:** i shit you not

 **WONWOW:** WHW

 **WONWOW:** YOU'RE TELLING ME HE FUCKING-

 **WONWOW:** THEN WHAT

 **Giant Baby:** so obviously because i have 0 self control i gave him like 10 hickeys

 **Giant Baby:** in the back of a boOKSTORE

 **WONWOW:** LLOL

 **WONWOW:** oHGMY GOD IM GOING TO ROAST THE SHIT OUT OF HIM

 **Giant Baby:** nono nono nonononon

 **WONWOW:** too late ;))))

 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**WONWOW** added  **Garden Fairy** to the chat

 **WONWOW:** im horny, oppa

 **WONWOW:** pls fuck me

 **WONWOW:** \- love, jeon wonwoo

 **NotThe8:**??? >.?>[>_??}}\

 **NotThe8:** chokes

 **Mother:** wEn jUnHuI?

 **Garden Fairy:** stop the abuse

 **Garden Fairy:** m tired of being blackmailed

 **WONWOW:** blame mingyu ;)

 **Giant Baby:** tf

 **Giant Baby:** this is your fault

 **WONWOW:** noo

 **WONWOW:** you're just weak

 **Giant Baby:** lies

 **Garden Fairy:** :(

 **Giant Baby:** i mean ok

 **Giant Baby:** to be fair the pictures jun bribed me with were go o d

 **Garden Fairy:** you

 **Garden Fairy:** you gave in to some shitty pictures?

 **dkay:** im mildly disgusted

**Giant Baby:**

**Giant Baby:** wonwoo

 **Giant Baby:** you expect this to not make me weak

 **Divaboo:** lmAO

 **NotThe8:** im cryinf

 **Garden Fairy:**.. thats such a fucKING CRINGEY PICTURE

 **Giant Baby:** look aT YOUR NECK

 **Giant Baby:** it's way prettier now

 **dkay:** im going to die of second hand embarassment ^^;;

 **WONWOW:** jesus

 **Garden Fairy:** prettier?

 **Giant Baby:** mhm

 **Giant Baby:** it's covered in hickeys

 **Giant Baby:** my hickeys

 **Divaboo:** CHOKE

 **NotThe8:** snoRTT

 **WONWOW:** snort x2

 **High Quality English:** snort x3

 **Mother:** :(

 **Mother:** I'm disappointed in my offspring.

 **Mother:** Cheollie, it's all your fault

 **Father:**??? how

 **youneedjisoos:** where are soonyoung and jihoon

 **fanboy:**  thats what i wanna know ://

 **Garden Fairy:**  mingyu i'm blocking you irl

 **Garden Fairy:** take your sweaters back

 **WONWOW:** oh!! shit!!

 **Giant Baby:** hey baby no lets talk about this

 **Divaboo:** tbh soon and hoon prob off fucking lmaaao

 **dkay:** eXCUSE MEE

 **dkay:** soonyoungie would tell me :((

 **High Quality English:** hey b we could be off fucking too

 **High Quality English:** if you would like

 **Divaboo:** hnn hell ye

 **Divaboo:** bye hoebags!!

 **Mother:** bOO SEUNGKWAN YOU WHORE

 **Father:** oh

 **Father:** fun

 

Soonyoung looks up at his boyfriend with nothing but adoration in his eyes.

He hastily pauses his thrusts, instead opting to lean forward and brush Jihoon's hair out of his face. He's so pretty like this, completely fucked out with dark pink cheeks and saliva pooling on his neck. Soonyoung doesn't understand how they haven't done this before. 

"You're so cute, Hoonie," he cooes, grinning and pressing a kiss to the younger's temple. "I'm glad you're my boyfriend."

Jihoon glares at Soonyoung in response to his ministrations. "For fucks sake, Soon-nnh-young," he breathes, throwing an arm across his sweat-glistened forehead. "Your dick is inside me, don't  _stop_ in the middle of- fucking me." 

The taller sighs, tutting and shaking his head. The grin never disappears from his lips. 

"Don't be so needy, _Woozi_."

He lurches forward with full force, brushing against the other's prostate in one swift movement before he continues thrusting into Jihoon. Moans tumble out of the shorter boy endlessly, and Soonyoung's pretty sure that he's going to go insane if Jihoon doesn't stop clenching around him like that.

"I'm not needy,  _Hoshi,"_ Jihoon whines, purposely emphasizing the syllables of Soonyoung's nickname. 

Soonyoung's eyes flutter shut at the sound of Jihoon's high-pitched voice, fighting the urge to lean down and mark up his boyfriend's neck.

_"Say my name like that again."_

 

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**kwon sinyoung:** hey guysss :-))

 **kwon sinyoung:** happy monday!! <3

 **edgelord:** yeah, happy monday

 **Father:** woah, what the fuck? did jihoon just say "happy monday"

 **High Quality English:**??? you guys high or something

 **fanboy:** soonyoungie, should i call a doctor for jihoon?

 **kwon sinyoung:** what're you talking aboutt

 **edgelord:** i'm always this nice 

 **Mother:** Hoon, I don't know if nice is the right word ;*

 **NotThe8:**...

 **NotThe8:** did yall fuck or some shit i'm confusion??

 **Divaboo:** smh

 **edgelord:** no

 **kwon sinyoung:** no

 **WONWOW:** they totally fucked

 **WONWOW:** rip seokmin

 **dkay:**? excuse me

 **dkay:** no

 **dkay:** soonyoung would tell me right

 **dkay:** right soonyoungie?

 **kwon sinyoung:**.. mhm :)

 **youneedjisoos:** what does that .. mean

 **Divaboo:** bitcH HE PUT A ... WE IN TROUBLE

 **kwon sinyoung:** oh! my finger slipped lol <3

 **Garden Fairy:** uh huh

 **Giant Baby:** so who was the top

 **kwon sinyoung:** obviously meee?? wth :(

 **kwon sinyoung** muted the chat

 **edgelord** muted the chat

 **NotThe8:** OH MY GOD THEY FUCKED

 **WONWOW:** LOL

 **WONWOW:** I CAN'T

 **youneedjisoos:** HOW MANY SINNERS ARE THERE HERE WTF

 **Mother:** There goes Jihoonie's virginity :((

 **dkay:** :)

 **dkay:** :))

 **dkay:** :)))

 **dkay:** :))))

 **dkay:** :)))))

 **dkay** unmuted  **kwon sinyoung**

 **dkay:** KWON SINYOUNG YOU SHITTY FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT YOU SAID YOU'D TELL ME

 **dkay:** WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO BEING BEST FRIENDS

 **dkay:** HMM?

 **dkay:** WE'RE NOT ON SPEAKINF TERMS b bITCH

 **kwon sinyoung:** oh

 **kwon sinyoung:** i was haha joking guys! we didn't do anything dirty i promis <3

 **edgelord** unmuted the chat

 **edgelord:** we did something a little dirty

 **edgelord:** but i didn't mind it..

 **NotThe8:** SNoRT

 **Father:** for fffuck  s sake

 **WONWOW:** NICE JOB JIHOON

 **Garden Fairy:** i cant

 **youneedjisoos** changed  **kwon sinyoung** 's name to  **BIG BAG OF SIN #1**

 **youneedjisoos** changed  **edgelord** 's name to  **BIG BAG OF SIN #2**

 **youneedjisoos:** fuck yall

 **fanboy:**....

 **fanboy:** im spooked :(

 

 

 

_a/n;_

someone requested soonhoon so i decided to put a lil something in here for them

ik it's shitty but :(( 

also!! sorry this update took so long! i have a final this week and im super stressed n all that so

hope you all enjoyed the chap!


	13. who here has a bee kink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol im sorry  
> this chapter was inspired by a convo my friend and i had today  
> also i just remembered wonwoo's birthday is in less than a month and i'm so excited  
> my child is turning 21 aah

**seokmin and the 12 hoes**

**Divaboo:** hey, who here has a bee kink

 **youneedjisoos:** what? the? fuck?

 **Father:** i didn't know a "bee kink" was a thing

 **Divaboo:** well i'm just asking because vernonie told me it was a thing

 **Divaboo:** do bee kink people like getting stung or something?

 **NotThe8:** "bee kink people"

 **WONWOW:** im cryinfg

 **High Quality English:** you bought that?

 **High Quality English:** i was fucking wit you lmao

 **fanboy:** bees?

 **fanboy:** how would you get turned on by bees

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #1** **:** channie :*

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #1:** dw about it <3

 **Garden Fairy:** a bee kink???

 **Garden Fairy:** do they like honey being poured over them the fucj

 **NotThe8:** LOL

 **Father:** i think thats known as food play

 **Divaboo:** ffs

 **Divaboo:** vernon this is all your fault

 **High Quality English:**?? wht

 **High Quality English:** why did you believe me when i said "some people have a bee kink"

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #2:** one time i was told that there's a dentist kink

 **gyu:**??

 **WONWOW:** "oh yeah daddy touch me with your forceps"

 **youneedjisoos:** for fucks-

 **NotThe8:** "brush me with your teeth"

 **dkay:** wwhAT

 **Divaboo:** LOL

 **Garden Fairy:** pleaSE end it all

 **Mother:** "Slather me in toothpaste" ;*

 **youneedjisoos:** jEONGHAN?

 **dkay:** motHER?

 **Father:** i mean if thats what you want

 **Father:** i can go buy some toothpaste

 **Mother:** No, Cheollie, you dumb hoe

 **Mother:** I was kidding :(

 **NotThe8:** -cries in french-

 **Father:**. oh

 **gyu:** i cant

 **gyu:** this is cancer

 **Divaboo:** oo what if thats a thing

 **Divaboo:** terminal illness kink

 **youneedjisoos:** what in the everloving fuck, seungkwan

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #2:** tbh i hope you get a terminal illness

 **fanboy:** im so confused

 **fanboy:** terminal illnesses are bad, dont be mean jihoon!!

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #1:** thats my channie

 **fanboy:** <33

 **gyu:** ok but my question is

 **gyu:** how would a bee get you going

 **Divaboo:** um idk, maybe if they sensually buzz buzz in your ear

 **NotThe8:** what

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #2:** how does one get a bee to "sensually buzz buzz" in their ear

**WONWOW:**

****

**youneedjisoos:** have you even watched the bee movie

 **Garden Fairy:** i have an overwhelming urge to stab myself with a spatula

 **Mother:** Suicide isn't the answer ;0

 **WONWOW:** of course i've watched the bee movie

 **WONWOW:** minghao forced me to watch it without chinese or korean subs 

 **WONWOW:** 6 times

 **NotThe8:** i did no such thing

 **NotThe8:** it was all for the memes ;)

 **Father:** so what other weird kinks does seungkwan think exist

 **High Quality English:** let's see

 **High Quality English:** a zombie kink?

 **Divaboo:** ewwwW

 **gyu:** lol that's like saying you have a wonwoo kink

 **gyu:** i don't think i've ever seen him wake up before 10 am

 **WONWOW:** and his eyebags are deeper than my love for minghao

 **Garden Fairy:** why the fuck am i being attacked

 **NotThe8:** :(

 **NotThe8:** tbh thats pretty deep tho

 **High Quality English:** you know what else goes deep

 **youneedjisoos:** vernon i will fucking baptize you

 **High Quality English:** my appreciation for hong jisoo :)

 **youneedjisoos:** aw :)

 **youneedjisoos:** thanks vernon

 **WONWOW:** snort

 **dkay:** im honestly just disappointed in myself

 **dkay:** why are you guys my friends

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #1:** good question!! :'

 **dkay:** you bitch i told you we are nOT ON SPEAKING TERMS

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #1:** im your hyung :((

 **BIG BAG OF SIN #1:** cmon seokminnie </3

 **dkay** changed  **BIG BAG OF SIN #1** 's name to  **traitor**

 **dkay** changed  **BIG BAG OF SIN #2** 's name to  **still a traitor**

 **still a traitor:** kms

 **still a traitor:** soonyoung, i blame you for telling all of these fucks

 **traitor:** sorry baby <33 :*

 **Father:**? wowza ?

 **NotThe8:** i thot you weren't allowed to call him baby

 **still a traitor:** he's not

 **gyu:** scary

 **still a traitor:** which is why i'm about to grab my guitar

 **traitor:** no no hoonie not the guitar

 **dkay:** fucking smash his head with it plspls

 **traitor:** i'll do anything hoon

 **traitor:** not the guitar ;;

 **Mother:** Jihoon, if you abuse one of my children I'm prohibiting you from leaving your dorm room.

 **Mother:** I will fucking bolt the door shut :)

 **still a traitor:** hey that's not fair

 **Divaboo:** i just realized the best kink

 **Divaboo:** oppa kink

 **Divaboo:** oBviOuSlY

 **Father:** thats no fun ://

 **Father:** bc its an actual kink

 **youneedjisoos:** and apparently everyone in this groupchat has it

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **WONWOW:** jeon wonwoo dont ever tRY to wiggle your way out of that shit

 **WONWOW:** do i need to remind you of the bookstore ;)))

 **Garden Fairy:** guilty

 **gyu:** same

 **NotThe8:** same x2

 **High Quality English:** same x3

 **Divaboo:** same x4

 **WONWOW:** same x5

 **Mother:**.. same x6 :(

 **Father:** same x7

 **traitor:** same

 **still a traitor:** no

 **still a traitor:** there's no way i'm doing that

 **dkay:** im crying

 **dkay:** please tell me you hit him with the guitar

 **still a traitor:** i wish

 **Divaboo:** hmmm

 **Divaboo:** what about a music kink

 **Divaboo:** all of us major in the arts except for wonu and seokmin

 **WONWOW:** tru

 **dkay:** i can sing tho >:((

 **Father:** wouldnt a music kink just entail like

 **Father:** intense eargasms

 **gyu:** tbh my kink is wonwoo singing

 **NotThe8:** actually same

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **Garden Fairy:** im better at rapping

 **gyu:** well yeah, that too, but your voice is so nice

 **traitor:** seokminnie can hit those high notes~ :*

 **dkay:** dOnT tAlK tO mE

 **still a traitor:** wait chan what's your major

 **fanboy:** dance :-)

 **NotThe8:** hahahahaha

 **NotThe8:** proof that dance is the best major

 **WONWOW:** actings better fucc u

 **gyu:** agree ^

 **still a traitor:** nah fuck you all, music production is better

 **Father:** smh

 **Father:** yes, staying locked up in a studio 25 hours a day is fun

 **dkay:** honestly fuck psychology

 **dkay:** i hope psychology burns and dies

 **Garden Fairy:** hey :(

 **Garden Fairy:** if that happens i wont b able to find a job

 **Mother:** Seungkwan and I have the best major actually :)

 **Mother:** Vocal composition is the shit jfc

 **Divaboo:** yes!!

 **NotThe8:** kek why dont we just start a band

 **Father:** we could be the next super junior

 **youneedjisoos:** ha! youre funny 

 **youneedjisoos:** im going to be a vocal professor, fuck yall and your discount suju

 **dkay:**  !just teach us instead

 **High Quality English:** what would we even name ourselves

 **Divaboo:** "the 13 music kinks"

 **WONWOW** has renamed the chat  **the 13 music kinks**

 **WONWOW:** hi my name is junhui, main vocalist and dancer for the 13 music kinks

 **still a traitor:** hi my name is jihoon, and i'm about to end it all

 **Divaboo:** hi my name is seungkwan, and you're watching disney channel

 **NotThe8:** hey fuck no i wanna be a dancer too :((

 **Garden Fairy:** i wanna rap

 **Garden Fairy:** i could probably make a mixtape thats less of a flop than vernon's

 **High Quality English:** wow ok

 **gyu:**?? my boyfriend's a savage

 **gyu:** if you're rapping count me the fuck in

 **Father:** joshua can be our solo guitarist

 **youneedjisoos:** lol!!

 **youneedjisoos:** you're funny!

 **fanboy:** can i dance too?

 **fanboy:** i can also rap

 **fanboy:** better than vernon!! :)

 **traitor:** oh my goodness

 **High Quality English:** k im officially committing suicide

 **Mother:** I picked a new favorite child!

 **Mother:** His name is Lee Chan!

 **dkay:** unfair

 **fanboy:** thanks jeonghan!!

 **WONWOW:** im kicking chan out of our band

 **WONWOW:** we are now the 12 music kinks

 **NotThe8** renamed the chat  **the 12 music kinks + chan**

 **NotThe8:** he's too innocent to have kinks

 **gyu:** agreed

 **still a traitor:** alright, lets go sign with SM ent so that jun and minghao also leave the group

 **WONWOW:** wow he pulled out the SM card

 **NotThe8:** kek, low blow

 **WONWOW:** minghao, if we want to get fed we have to sign somewhere else 

 **traitor:** :( im still upset about kris and lu and tao

 **traitor:** heck SM ent :(

 **Garden Fairy:** honestly who isnt upset about that 

 **gyu:**.. so what's SM again?

 

 

_a/n;_

lol remember how i said i have a final

yeah, i wrote this instead of studying whoops

did you guys like my jab at SM ent (i hate that company :-))

i hope all of you are having a good day


	14. listen here you little bitch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eyyy i passed my final  
> daily updates for a while as im on break from summer school
> 
> also i love jeon wonwoo so much, i dont know if i say that enough
> 
> we're gonna pretend that sogang university has a good arts program (not like its nonexistent or anything, cough)

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**youneedjisoos:** smh

 **youneedjisoos:** is it just me or is this university filled with sin

 **High Quality English:** lol its college, i'd expect nothing less

 **NotThe8:** ^

 **NotThe8:** i take pride in knowing that junnie and i have fucked in at least six of the bathrooms here ;)

 **still a traitor:** brb gotta go bleach my eyes

 **fanboy:**. so i'm not going to the bathroom near class anymore

 **dkay:** gasp

 **dkay:** my chan is being traumatized

 **WONWOW:** i mean he's not lying

 **WONWOW:** i think 6 bathrooms is an understatement tho ;))

 **NotThe8:** ;)))

 **Garden Fairy:** jihoon, have any bleach left?

 **Garden Fairy:** bc i need it

 **youneedjisoos:** hEY, you can't talk, sinner

 **youneedjisoos:** i know what you and mingyu do in bathrooms, ffs

 **dkay:** *shudder*

 **gyu:** it was once

 **gyu:** o n c e

 **youneedjisoos:** it was still traumatizing enough to make me want to throw bibles at you

 **traitor** changed their name to  **the mediator**

 **the mediator:** stop fighting :(

 **youneedjisoos:** i wasn't fighting, i was just pointing out the fact that minwon is gross

 **Garden Fairy:** actually gyu is like, the opposite of gross

 **Garden Fairy:** have you seen his arms

 **Garden Fairy:** *heavy breathing*

 **Divaboo:** cringe! alert! 

**NotThe8:**

****

**NotThe8:** you mean these arms?

 **NotThe8:** ft. wen junhui being a fuckin creep in the background ;)

 **gyu:** where the fuck-

 **Garden Fairy:** how does it feel to have your pictures exposed

 **NotThe8:** oh and this one!

**NotThe8:**

**WONWOW:** when mingyu's an even bigger fuckin dork than woowoo

 **Garden Fairy:** did you just call me woowoo

 **Garden Fairy:** listen here you little bitch

 **WONWOW:** im your hyung :)

 **gyu:** i feel throughly attacked

 **gyu:** what did i do to deserve this

 **Father:** k e k

 **Garden Fairy:** i dont know, maybe you told jun about the bookstore thing

 **WONWOW:** and then i told the entire campus ;)

 **fanboy:** woah isnt that like 8000 people

 **WONWOW:** hahahaha

 **WONWOW:** if you count the graduate school, it's 12,000 <3

 **gyu:** tbh im not too worried

 **gyu:** jun can barely maintain 1 friend, let alone 12000

 **Mother:** I'm convinced that Jun's only "friend" is Minghao.

 **Mother:** And even then, it's questionable ;*

 **WONWOW:** woah hey when did this turn into a roast session

 **youneedjisoos:** when isn't it a roast session

 **still a traitor:** when isn't it a roast session

 **still a traitor:** i like the way you think, jisoo

 **youneedjisoos:** bless

 **NotThe8:** tbh when did i say i was friends with jun

 **NotThe8:** he's pretty fuckin weird imo

 **Garden Fairy:** i agree, he does some sketchy shit

 **the mediator:** i thought we were over the fighting :(

 **dkay:** so we can confirm that jun has no friends right

 **High Quality English:** lol

 **Divaboo:** i know for a fact he has none

 **WONWOW** left the chat

 **Father:** lol fuck that guy

 **Father:** wen junhui? i only know when junehoe

 **NotThe8:** right? what a loser

 **gyu:** snort

 **fanboy:** wait minghao i thought you were dating jun

 **NotThe8** added  **WONWOW** to the chat

 **NotThe8** changed  **WONWOW** 's name to **jun** **daddy**

 **NotThe8:** dating jun? where'd you get that idea from

 **still a traitor:** this is great lmao

 **Mother:** Ew, why is he back

 **jundaddy:** its okay

 **jundaddy:** all i need is minghao to be happy fuck you guys

 **the mediator:** aw

 **fanboy:** thats so cute :'''(

 **Garden Fairy:** wow cheesy

 **jundaddy:** i repeat, fuck you

 

 **NotThe8** started a private chat with **jun** **daddy**

 **NotThe8:** i love youuu

 **jun** **daddy:** kek

 **jundaddy:** i love you too baby

 **NotThe8:** can we go on a date

 **NotThe8:** tomorrow

 **jundaddy:** where do you want to go :')

 **NotThe8:** anywhere

 **NotThe8:** except the bookstore ;(

 **jundaddy:** are there any gud movies out rn?

 **jundaddy:** also i have class until 14:00 so we cant do anything until after then

 **NotThe8:** thats ok

 **NotThe8:** i was thinking latr in the afternoon anyways,,

 **NotThe8:** && there's only horror movies out 

 **jundaddy:** perfect lmao

 **jundaddy:** that just means i get to hold your scared ass until the movie is over, which i'm more than fine with

 **NotThe8:** you kno what we should do

 **jundaddy:**?

 **NotThe8:** make it a double date

 **jundaddy:** thats the cringiest thing i've ever heard you say jfc

 **jundaddy:** i'm assuming you mean with mingyu and woowoo tho

 **NotThe8:** woowoo, snort

 **NotThe8:** and ye

 **NotThe8:** they need to get out more 

 **jundaddy:** agree

 **jundaddy:** come over to mine around 5pm then

 **jundaddy:** we can get dinner afterwards

 **NotThe8:** mk

 

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**jundaddy:** hey woowoo, guess what

 **Garden Fairy:** i'm not talking to you

 **Father:** once again, im the only dad

 **Father:** fuck outta here

 **Mother:**!

 **NotThe8:** you're going on a double date with junnie and i

 **NotThe8:** you should prob bring mingyu ;)

 **Divaboo:** woW CriNgE

 **Divaboo:** why wasn't i invited :(

 **gyu:** a date?

 **gyu:** wonwoo lets go

 **jundaddy:** because

 **jundaddy:** knowing you, you'd probably fuck with vernon in the back of the movie theatre

 **Garden Fairy:** we're going to see a movie?

 **NotThe8:** a horror movie ;)

 **youneedjisoos:** this is too domestic

 **youneedjisoos:** dates and shit wow

 **dkay:** its kind of cute

 **gyu:** horror movie? fuck yes

 **Divaboo:** i'm offended

 **High Quality English:** he's not wrong, boo

 **High Quality English:** mayb i'll take you on a date alone

 **still a traitor:** -gags-

 **youneedjisoos:** i changed my mind, this is cringey as fuck

 **Father:** hannie, you want to go on a date too?

 **Mother:** I gotta get my hair done tomorrow :((

 **fanboy:** aw, my hyungs are in love

 **still a traitor:** no

 **dkay:** no

 **youneedjisoos:** definitely not

 **the mediator:** google, why doesn't my boyfriend love me

 **Father:** good question

 **Father:** mine loves his shampoo more than me

 **jundaddy:** ffs

 **jundaddy:** these bandwagons

 **Mother:** That's not.. entirely true, Cheollie </3

 **youneedjisoos:** wowza

 **NotThe8:** ,, anyways

 **NotThe8:** come to jun's place at 5 ;))))

 **jundaddy:** try to look semi-decent kthx

 **Garden Fairy:** sigh

 **Garden Fairy:** fine

 

 

 

 

_a/n;_

_ **there's gonna be a junhao and meanie double date next chapter prepare your hearts** _

quick question,, seoksoo or no?

i actually really like the ship and tbh it's super cute, so i was thinking about slowly building their relationship

obviously they wont be sinners tho and they'll keep it on the down low

give me your opinions!!

also i just started using tumblr again,, so if you guys want to follow me that'd be super cool @faintingseasons


	15. abstinence is the only way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry for the late update!!  
> there's this free print deal on shutterfly for 4th of july that only lasts for three days and i've been rushing to make photocards so i didn't have time to write aaah :(
> 
> happy fourth fellow americans,,  
> to the rest of you, i hope you're having a fantastic tuesday/wednesday
> 
> also i wrote this in a span of 3 hours please let me know if there's errors
> 
> AND HEY BTW IF YOU HAVEN'T LISTENED TO THIS BOP THAT BTS RELEASED TODAY PLEASE LISTEN TO IT  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFBfQNXDQmg

Wonwoo huddles closer to Mingyu as they walk down the frost-slicked street, shivering despite leaving the apartment barely a minute ago. He doesn't understand why Seoul is so cold already; it's only December 1st. The tree branches above their heads are lined in a silky white, swaying in the breeze that late fall has draped over the city. Normally, Wonwoo would love the cloudy, dreary weather, but today it's just a nuisance. 

He would much rather be curled up in his bed with Mingyu right now, sipping on a cup of hot tea while reading a novel. But no, his annoying ass best friend decided to invite them on a double date. 

"Hey," Mingyu whispers, lips just short of grazing Wonwoo's ear. The shorter man nearly jumps, startled by the sudden intrusion on his inner monologue.

"Hey yourself," Wonwoo replies, still shivering from the imminent chill in the air. "Thanks for scaring the shit out of me."

Mingyu wraps his arms around his boyfriend, a few chuckles escaping into the brisk air between them. "Why are you always so desultory?"

"D-desultory? That's a big word." he hesitated, blinking a few times in confusion.

"Desultory. You're a lit major, silly, don't you know what it means?" Mingyu ruffles his hair, pecking the older on the forehead.

Wonwoo pushes Mingyu away, scoffing and crossing his arms as he keeps walking in the direction of Jun's place. "Whatever, I don't need to know anyways." He ignores the shiver that comes back to settle in his bones, avoiding a small patch of black ice before he slips and embarasses himself. His best friend's dorm is in view by now, and he turns back to see Mingyu only millimetres away from his face.

"Let me kiss you. I don't want to do it while Junhui's there, he might kick my ass."

The shorter shakes his head, peering at Mingyu through his round-rimmed glasses. He pulls the other in anyways, grabbing on to the lapels of his coat and pressing his lips to Mingyu's. Their kisses are always sweet to Wonwoo, tasting of whatever lip balm Mingyu put on and the smell of mint. The taller rests his arms on Wonwoo's hips, nibbling on his bottom lip in request for entrance. The shorter complies, of course, parting his lips slightly before he feels Mingyu exploring his mouth with his tongue. He wills himself to keep quiet- they're in the middle of the sidewalk for fuck's sake- but as per usual, luck doesn't go his way. The smallest moan falls past his red lips, tumbling into Mingyu's mouth and getting lost in the kiss. 

Mingyu pulls away, a smirk gracing his spit-slicked lips. "C'mon  _princess_ , before someone sees us." He tangles his fingers with Wonwoo's, pulling his dazed boyfriend along behind him. 

_Did he just call me princess?_

 

**ALL THINGS HOLY**

**fanboy:** hey guys!

 **fanboy:** where is everyone :(

 **youneedjisoos:** out on dates >:(

 **youneedjisoos:** they're all sinning istg

 **youneedjisoos:** abstinence is the only way, chan

 **fanboy:** abstinence?

 **dkay:** for fucckks ssake

 **fanboy:** i don't even think about sex its ok

 **youneedjisoos:** gasp

 **youneedjisoos:** im so proud

 **dkay:** our channie is so pure

 **dkay:** bless

 **youneedjisoos:** the three of us should go out

 **youneedjisoos:** we can do karaoke!

**youneedjisoos:**

****

**dkay:**!!! yes

 **fanboy:** i can't :(

 **fanboy:** i'm studying for midterms

 **dkay:** why

 **dkay:** it's barely even december :((

 **fanboy:** still! 

 **fanboy:** i'm going home early this year 

 **fanboy:** i miss iksan </3

 **youneedjisoos:** aw

 **youneedjisoos:** seokmin, do you want to go with me?

 **dkay:** sure

 **youneedjisoos:** meet me in the courtyard by ricci hall ^^

 

Jun rests his hand on Minghao's thigh, fingers slowly tapping on the younger's knee while he stuffs popcorn in his mouth. He has his arm slinged around the younger's shoulders, throwing a glance in Mingyu's direction to make sure he's doing the same with Wonwoo. A grin crosses his face when he sees Mingyu nearly cuddling his best friend, most likely in preparation for the gory shit this movie has to offer.

He then lowers his head, nipping the flesh under Minghao's ear and reveling in the way the younger flinches. Jun only continues when he sees his boyfriend gripping onto the armrest, sucking a dark, blooming red hickey into the space. He trails his lips further down, leaving butterfly kisses in his wake. 

"Jun, Mingyu and Wonwoo are about a meter away from us," Minghao murmurs, thick Northeastern accent adorning his Mandarin.

The older smirks; _h_ _e always switches to Chinese when he's worked up._ Jun runs his hand up Minghao's arm. "So? It's not like they aren't doing the same thing."

He gestures towards the couple near them, holding in a giggle when he sees Wonwoo squirming around in his seat with an annoyed expression. Jun's hardly paying any mind to the movie at this point.

Minghao pushes the older's arm away, rolling his eyes in response. "Go suck a dick."

"I'll suck yours," Jun offers, voice low and breathy.

"Fuck you," Minghao falters, shifting out of his seat and moving to tap on Mingyu's shoulder. He turns his head to raise an eyebrow at the younger, pushing the yoke of Wonwoo's sweater back onto his shoulders.

"What's up?"

"Switch seats with me, Jun's trying to get in my pants."

"..But I'm trying to get in Wonwoo's pants."

Minghao rolls his eyes, shoving the giant out of his seat. "Better luck next time." He settles in the seat next to Wonwoo, ignoring the blotchy red marks on the older's neck and shoulders. 

Both of them throw looks at Jun and Mingyu, respectively, smiling at their matching pouts. 

"Time to actually focus on the movie," Wonwoo mutters, dipping his hand in a small bucket of popcorn. 

Joining him, Minghao tosses a few pieces of popcorn into his mouth. "That sounds fantastic."

 

Wonwoo doesn't understand how this happened.

He's on his knees again, this time in a movie theater bathroom stall instead of some nice club in Gangnam. Mingyu is sat in front of him, carding his fingers through his thick black locks. Wonwoo's glasses are somewhere on the floor, discarded and most likely cracked. The taller tugs on his hair lightly, forcing Wonwoo to look up at him with something indescribable in his eyes. 

"Here we are again," Mingyu voices, breaking the soft silence in the bathroom. "Please tell me if you want to stop."

The older nods, taking a deep breath before shuffling forward on his knees. He grabs onto Mingyu's thighs, dipping his head down to the zipper of his jeans. Pulling it open with his teeth, Wonwoo slowly palms the other through his boxers. He's proud of himself for being able to rile up his boyfriend so quickly- Wonwoo never took himself for the type that could do so. After a few moments he frees the other's cock, hands softly gripping the base only to pull and flick his wrist on the upstroke. Mingyu lets out an undeniably pornographic groan, before realizing that they're still in a  _fucking movie theater bathroom_ and not a private space. 

Wonwoo stops moving his hand for a moment, returning it to the younger's thighs. He instead hovers over the other, opening his mouth eagerly. His pretty lips, as Mingyu likes to call them, slide down the shaft, and his tongue laps up any precome. Wonwoo flattens it against the vein he knows all too well, tracing it with his tastebuds as he bobs his head and down. Mingyu's biting his lip so hard that he's drawing blood, his fingers scrabbling at Wonwoo's scalp as if it's a lifeline. He pushes the shorter away for a moment, nearly coming at the sight of his wet lips and unfocused eyes. 

"Can I maybe fuck your throat?"

"Can I ride you instead? I don't need prep."

Mingyu immediately nods, sighing and patting his thighs softly. Wonwoo sheds his jeans and boxers in what seems like an instant, crawling up onto Mingyu's lap. The taller grabs Wonwoo's hips, carefully guiding him onto his aching cock. The older lets out a hiss of pain at the stretch, but Mingyu holds him in place in favor of not hurting him too much. "Tell me when I'm good to move."

After a minute or so, Wonwoo begins to slide himself down, englufing the entire length. He sits fully on Mingyu's lap, leaning his head back against the younger's shoulder. Mingyu loves the way his boyfriend's eyes flutter shut, heavy sighs falling past his lips. He bounces up and down so nicely- and  _oh God, he's almost there-_

"For fucks sake!"

A high-pitched screech disrupts their ministrations, Wonwoo covering his mouth mid-moan. Mingyu's eyes widen to the size of saucers, quickly hefting his boyfriend off of his lap. "T-that sounded a lot like Joshua.." Wonwoo suddenly whimpered, moving to pull his clothes back on.

"If you nasty sinners are going to fuck, stop doing it in the goddamn bathroom!" The voice shouts, and _yep, that's definitely Hong fucking Jisoo._            

"He doesn't know it's us," Mingyu whispers back, silently inching off of the closed seat. "Don't move."

Eventually they hear footsteps stomping out of the room, heavy wooden door slamming in Joshua's wake. Wonwoo lets out a laugh, grabbing onto Mingyu's arm as he starts cackling. "That- that was the funniest shit I've ever-" he chokes out in between laughs, and Mingyu can't help but join in. 

He's still kind of pissed that he didn't get to come though, even as he's laughing his ass off with his boyfriend on the floor.

 

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**NotThe8:** that was scary as fuck :::*

 **NotThe8:** also fuck you jun

 **jundaddy:** hey, i did nothing

 **Divaboo:** l m ao

 **Divaboo:** i got so much dicking uggghg

 **Father:** i miss being young

 **youneedjisoos:** we're the same age

 **youneedjisoos:** also i had a fucking terrible day

 **dkay:** but we went to karaoke :(

 **youneedjisoos:** yeah but i fucking

**youneedjisoos:**

**still a traitor:** here we go

 **youneedjisoos:** so i had to pee right

 **youneedjisoos:** and we were walking to karaoke so we passed one of the cinemas

 **youneedjisoos:** so obvi being a smart person i went inside to go to the bathroom

 **youneedjisoos:** and there were people fucking!!!! jUST MY LUCK

 **youneedjisoos:** and i dont even know who they were so i cant report them >:////

 **Mother:**.

 **Garden Fairy:** LOL

 **gyu:** HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GET FUCKED JISOO

 **jundaddy:** well then

 **youneedjisoos:** liSTEN YOU LITTLE NASTY BITCH IM YOUR HYUNG

 **fanboy:** oh my

 **the mediator:** stopstopstopstopstopstop

 **the mediator:** i told you no fighting

 **gyu:** we're not fighting, i'm just laughing my fucking ass off

 **Garden Fairy:** same

 **Garden Fairy:** oh my god mingyu

 **gyu:** we're so good baby

 **NotThe8:** im confused as fuck

 **High Quality English:** what did you guys even do

 **High Quality English:** lol

 **dkay:** they probably did nasty shit

 **jundaddy:** you mean they fucked?

 **jundaddy:** i wouldn't be surprised ;)

 **gyu:** hey now

 **Mother:** Istg

 **Mother:** I'm about to dump holy water on you bitches

 **youneedjisoos:** yes please they need it

 **NotThe8:** but hannie

 **still a traitor:** don't you and cheol fuck like

 **still a traitor:** all the time

 **Father:** yep

 **Mother:** No.

 **Mother** left the chat

 **Father:** he's a liar 

 **the mediator:** ack

 **the mediator** added  **Mother** to the chat

 **Mother:** :(

 **Divaboo** changed their name to  **SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME**

 **jundaddy:** SNORT

 **dkay:** seungkwan..

 **High Quality English:** help me 

 **High Quality English:** oh my fucking god he's blasting lene alexandra

 **still a traitor:** who the fuck is that

 **SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME:** I PICK ALL MY SKIRTS TO BE A LITTLE TOO SEXY

 **SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME:** JUST LIKE ALL MY THOTS THEY GET A BIT NAUGHTY

 **fanboy:** make it stop make it stop

 **still a traitor:** he's typing in english, fucking shoot me

 **SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME:** MY MOUTH NEVER TAKES A HOLIDAY 

 **SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME:** I LIKE ALL MY SHORTS TO BE A LITTLE TOO SHORTY 

 **SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME:** UNLIKE ALL MY GUYS, I LIKE THEM TALL WITH MONEY

 **High Quality English:**  um

 **High Quality English:**  im like 90% sure he's doing a strip tease while texting us

 **High Quality English:** wow

 **youneedjisoos:**  i really just

 **youneedjisoos:**  hate all of you

 **dkay:**  what about me :((

 **fanboy:**  and me?? :(

 **youneedjisoos:**  you guys are ok

 **Garden Fairy:**  i'm crying-

 **High Quality English:**  yeah i'm gonna go, he puts those thigh highs on

 **jundaddy:**  tmi

 **Father:** if only jeonghan had thigh highs

 **NotThe8:**  this is gr8

**Mother:**

****

**Father:** i think he's actually crying

 **Father:** well fuck, gotta blast

 **still a traitor:** sigh

 **gyu:** you know

 **gyu:** wonwoo has a nice ass

 **Garden Fairy:** the fuck

 **jundaddy:** agreed

 **NotThe8:** the fuck?

 **jundaddy:** but minghao's is better

 **gyu:** i think not

 **NotThe8:** ;)

 **the mediator:** i

 **the mediator:** i just came out here to have a good time and i'm honestly feeling so attacked right now

 **dkay:** smh,,,, same

 **youneedjisoos:** you're feeling attacked?

 **youneedjisoos:** THIS IS THE SECOND TIME I'VE WALKED IN ON PEOPLE FUCKING IN A BATHROOM

 **youneedjisoos:** THIS WEEK

 

 

 

_a/n;_

just a heads up, when i say hao/jun is speaking chinese, i usually mean mandarin because that's what i'm most familar with,, yes i know jun is from shenzhen which is predominantly cantonese but you know what

lol this chapter is a shitshow im sorry

there's seoksoo if you squint but like i said its going to be reaaally slow development 

also i'm all for switch!meanie so uhh you might want to expect some of that later on,, if you're really opposed to it though let me know haha

once again im sorry for this taking so long </3


	16. operation get channie a girlfriend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woooh i watched the 'come back home' mv last night 19 minutes after it came out and i'm very pleased with it wowza (except for the fact that jin only has 18.8 seconds of vocals, even though he killed the falsetto)  
> i'm glad bts wasn't in it though, my boys need some rest
> 
> also, out of the three vcrs seventeen released, which one was your favorite?  
> mine was the performance unit

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME:** so christmas is in like 3 weeks right?

 **still a traitor:** i can't take you seriously with that name seungkwan

 **Father:** same

 **SEXY NAUGHTY BITCHY ME** changed their name to  **Divaboo**

 **Divaboo:** fine

 **Divaboo:** but i was thinking we could all go out on christmas eve!

 **Divaboo:** i'm not going back to jeju-do because the airfare is too expensive :( but

 **fanboy:** uuh well

 **fanboy:** i'm going back to iksan :<

 **gyu:** won and i will be out by anyang to meet my parents

 **Garden Fairy:** ^^

 **Garden Fairy:** and i don't really wanna take a 45 min drive just to go out with you guys 

 **still a traitor:** i'm taking soonyoung with me to busan

 **Mother:** Joshua and I will be here!!!

 **Mother:** We'll come and party with the kids ;))

 **youneedjisoos:** i mean as long as i don't see people fucking

 **Father:** hey

 **Father:** no clubbing while i'm not there

 **Father:** i'll be all the way in daegu, no fuckin way i'm letting you get drunk

 **Mother:** Who said I'm getting drunk >:(

 **Divaboo:** well fuck

 **Divaboo:** jun? hao? seokmin?

 **NotThe8:** about that

 **NotThe8:** junnie and i are taking a trip to dalian ;*)

 **NotThe8:** then my parents are going to drive me to anshan

 **jundaddy:** and i'll be taking another flight to shenzhen 

 **Divaboo:** for fucks sake,,,

 **Divaboo:** seokminnie please tell me you'll be here?

 **dkay:** ahah

 **dkay:** about that

 **dkay:** i'll be in yongin-si until like january

 **dkay:** i haven't seen my family in almost a year :/

 **youneedjisoos:** wait, all of the non-sinners will be gone

 **youneedjisoos:** no way i'm going

 **Mother:** aPPARENTLY I can't get wasted

 **High Quality English:** so it's just me and seungkwan?

 **High Quality English:** perfect

 **jundaddy:** kek, i have a feeling vernon didn't want us there in the first place

 **fanboy:** rip seungkwannie :(

 **Divaboo:** sigh

 **Divaboo:** so you're saying i'm stuck with this crusty bitch

 **Garden Fairy:** aren't you guys dating

 **Divaboo:** that's besides the point

 **the mediator:** :( sorry kwannie

**Divaboo:**

****

**High Quality English:** hey, i can cheer you up if you want

 **jundaddy:** thats our cue to let them go fuck

 **NotThe8:** snort

 

**wonWOAH**

**gyu:** hey, baby

 **gyu:** what do you want for christmas?

 **Garden Fairy:** it's like almost a month away gyu

 **gyu:** still

 **Garden Fairy:** i mean

 **Garden Fairy:** i was thinking um

 **gyu:** something sexual

 **Garden Fairy:** no pft what

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah

 **Garden Fairy:** i wanna try something

 **gyu:** your wish is my command

 **Garden Fairy:** uuuhh

 **Garden Fairy:** promis you wont laugh

 **gyu:** i wont?

 **gyu:** just tell me baby

 **Garden Fairy:** well i

 **Garden Fairy:** you know that.. victoria's store thing they opened in hongdae

 **gyu:** victoria's secret

 **Garden Fairy:** i was curious so i went in there and 

 **Garden Fairy:** i found cute things..

 **gyu:** you're telling me you went in a women's lingerie store

 **gyu:** and you want me to take you there

 **gyu:** because if that's the case

 **gyu:** fuck yes

 **Garden Fairy:** really??

 **Garden Fairy:** you don't have to, it'd be weird if like two men went in there together right

 **gyu:** idc

 **gyu:** we can just say we're buying presents for our girlfriends or something

 **Garden Fairy:**. right

 **Garden Fairy:** i'd like that

 **gyu:** anything else?

 **Garden Fairy:** mm

 **Garden Fairy:** i might give you a surprise for christmas, we'll see

 **gyu:** a surprise?

 **gyu:** i see

 **gyu:** i have to pay attention to this class before my professor kicks my ass

 **Garden Fairy:** love oyu

 **Garden Fairy:** you*

 **gyu:** i love you too baby

 

 

 **Divaboo** has started a private chat with  **High Quality English**

 **Divaboo:** lol!! they think we're fucking

 **High Quality English:** don't they always think we're fucking

 **High Quality English:** cause.. you know, we are always fucking

 **Divaboo:** not aaalways

 **Divaboo:** sometimes i just like to tease you

 **High Quality English:** mm, i've noticed

 **Divaboo:** i need to buy new thigh highs ;(

 **Divaboo:** you ruined mine

 **High Quality English:** sorry

 **Divaboo:** you don't sound sorry

 **High Quality English:** i'm not sorry

 **High Quality English:** they looked better painted in white

 **Divaboo:** how poetic of u

 **High Quality English:** you look good in white too 

 **Divaboo:** i look good in everything <33

 **Divaboo:** especially those thigh highs >:(

 **High Quality English:** i can't disagree

 **Divaboo:** ;)

 **High Quality English:** we should get wasted tonight

 **High Quality English:** crash at my place

 **Divaboo:** mmmk

 **Divaboo:** oh you know that new lingerie place???

 **High Quality English:** no

 **High Quality English:** wdym

 **Divaboo:** they opened a store in hongdaee

 **Divaboo:** i wanna go there

 **High Quality English:** then go there

 **Divaboo:** with you

 **High Quality English:** n o p e

 **High Quality English:** i'm sorry dearest but i'm not throwing away my pride

 **Divaboo:** asshole

 **Divaboo:** guess you won't see me in pink panties then

 **High Quality English:**. oh?

 **High Quality English:** i didn't know that was part of the deal

 **Divaboo:** come with me and you might get to see more than just the panties

 **High Quality English:** i might have to come then

 **Divaboo:** mmmhmmm

**Divaboo:**

**High Quality English:** stop using mean girls memes

 **Divaboo:** make me

 

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**fanboy:** fun fact!

 **fanboy:** i met this really pretty underground dancer today

 **Mother:** Oh?

 **Mother:** A girl?

 **fanboy:** yeah!

 **youneedjisoos:** he's straight remember

 **youneedjisoos:** if only the rest of you were straight, i wouldnt have to deal with y'all fucking eachother

 **still a traitor:** joshua.. you're gay

 **youneedjisoos:** oh yeah

 **dkay:** tell us about this girl channie

 **fanboy:** welll um she has blonde hair

 **fanboy:** and bangs

 **fanboy:** i think she's a foreigner..

 **fanboy:** but her korean is good!

 **fanboy:** i think her name was lalisa

 **NotThe8:** o wait wait wait

 **NotThe8:** lalisa manoban?

 **NotThe8:** she's like two years older than you channie

 **gyu:** so she was born in '97?

 **gyu:** i might have to hit her up sometime

 **Garden Fairy:** mingyu

 **Garden Fairy:** i will fucking castrate you

 **jundaddy:** shudder

 **Father:** that sounds awful

 **gyu:** i was jk

 **gyu:** it was a joke baby

 **gyu:** i would never cheat

 **jundaddy:** better not

 **the mediator:** this chat scares me D:

 **fanboy:** you're telling me she's older..

 **fanboy:** :(

 **fanboy:** she'd never like someone like me anyways

 **youneedjisoos:** hey what does that mean

 **dkay:** you're awesome channie~

 **dkay:** im sure she'd love you

 **fanboy:** really?

 **the mediator:** guysss

 **the mediator:** operation get channie a girlfriend?

 **Divaboo:** i'm in ;)

 **NotThe8:**.. same

 **dkay:** yes

 **youneedjisoos:** okay

 **youneedjisoos:** as long as he doesn't sin, he's still a baby

 **fanboy:** you guys are the best

 **fanboy:** <3

 **dkay:** anything for our channie

 

 

 

_a/n;_

so this is what happens when i start doing research for new fics

***hint hint hint***

i hope you guys like slow burn

probably wont be released for a while though :'

this chapter was kiiind of a filler but oh well,, also i might not be doing the switch!meanie thing because people prefer bottom!won but we'll see

10 days till' wonwoo turns 21

 


	17. mingchef to the rescue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello readers, how are you today
> 
> i've been mourning over the fact that i cant go to diamond edge :' but its all good because the next time they have a tour in the u.s. i will get tickets and touch jww's hand for sure
> 
> & sorry this update took so long, i haven't been feeling well
> 
> enjoy the chapter

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**gyu** changed their name to  **mingchef**

 **mingchef:** mingchef to the rescue!

 **mingchef:** won is sick :(

 **mingchef:** i told him not to go out without a jacket

 **Mother:** ;O

 **Mother:** I can make soup!

 **jundaddy:** i'll come over but i swear to fuckin god if he sneezes on me

 **Garden Fairy:** how bout no

 **Garden Fairy:** i literally just have a cold it's okay

 **fanboy:** hyung is sick??

 **fanboy:** i hope you feel better soon :<

 **mingchef:** you guys should all come over to his dorm

 **still a traitor:** lolol, yoongi would be so pissed if we did that

 **Divaboo:** im in c l a s s you sons of bitches

 **youneedjisoos:** did you just call my mom a bitch?

 **youneedjisoos:** fuck you

 **youneedjisoos:** i will actually knock you out with a bible

 **Divaboo:** ohmygod it's just a saying

 **the mediator:** #stopthefighting2k17

 **Mother:** I agree with Soonyoung ;(

 **Mother:** Be good children

 **Garden Fairy:** sig h mingyu

 **Garden Fairy:** can you stop fucking around in my kitchen and just cuddle with me

 **NotThe8:** snort 

 **Father:** snort x2

 **High Quality English:** same seungkwan can you just cuddle with me

 **Divaboo:** im literally-

 **mingchef:** fine

 **mingchef:** after i finish making food i'll cuddle you

 **Garden Fairy:** thats gonna take foreveeeeer

 **jundaddy:** is wonwoo whining?

 **jundaddy:** damn mingyu idk what you did to him but

 **still a traitor:** i've never seen wonwoo not-sarcastically complain

 **Garden Fairy:** hey fuck off, i'm sick

 **mingchef:** i mean i'm not gonna pass up to chance to keep him in bed for more than an hour

 **youneedjisoos:** sinners

 **dkay:** i mean

 **dkay:** cuddling isn't that bad

 **fanboy:** cute~

 **Garden Fairy:** ughghguh mingyu please

 **Garden Fairy:** you're like a room away come the fUCK over here

 **mingchef:** do you want to starve?

 **Garden Fairy:** yes

 **NotThe8:** i can't tell if this is

 **NotThe8:** romantic or mental abuse

 **High Quality English:** probably both

 **mingchef:** 5 more minutes

 **mingchef:** you sloth

 

 **Father** started a privte chat with  **Mother**

 **Father:** h a n n i e

 **Father:** when are you coming home?

 **Mother:** Lateeerr

 **Father:** mm don't get lost

 **Mother:** How would I get lost

 **Mother:** It's a fifteen minute walk from my class to our apartment

 **Mother:** You oaf

 **Father:** hey now

 **Father:** i'm just worried abt my boyfriend

 **Mother:** Don't be <3

 **Father:** we should invite the kids out

 **Father:** and go christmas shoppinf

 **Mother:** yES

 **Father:** the only person im worried abt is seungkwan

 **Father:** he'll probably want to go fucking

 **Father:** buy some lace shit

 **Mother:** So~

 **Mother:** I wanna spend time with my children before they all go away to see their fake parents ;((

 **Father:** "fake"

 **Mother:** Yes, fake

 **Mother:** I'm the real mother

 **Mother:** I went through hours of tiring labor

 **Mother:** And I get no love from them ;*

 **Father:** lies

 **Father** changed  **Mother** 's name to  **oVeRdRaMaTiC**

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** >:(

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** i'll drop your ass choi seungcheol

 **Father:** yeah yeah

 **Father:** go talk to them?

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** Fine

 

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

****oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** Listen up my dear offspring!

 **still a traitor:** please dont refer to me as your offspring

 **jundaddy:** wow nice name change jeonghoe

 **jundaddy:** its fitting

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** Cheollie-

 **Father:** shh

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC** : **We're all going shopping, losers

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Tomorrow

 **the mediator:** where??

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** Times Square Mall <3

 **mingchef:** you're going to make me drive a sick wonwoo all the way to times square

 **Garden Fairy:** :(

 **NotThe8:** mingyu i stg if you don't drag wonwoo's ass to the mall tomorrow i'm going to be mad

 **mingchef:** lol? why

 **NotThe8:** um duh

 **NotThe8:** i need a break from junhui's bitch ass

 **jundaddy:** rude

 **Father:** why does your name still have the word daddy in it

 **Garden Fairy:** tbh im flattered

 **Garden Fairy:** i'll make sure i'm there

 **Divaboo:** you better

 **Divaboo:** i found the best store omf

 **youneedjisoos:** here we go

 **Divaboo:** i'll show you when we get there~

 **Garden Fairy:** ok

 **fanboy:** i'll come!!

 **fanboy:** only if seokmiinie or jisoo drive me

 **dkay:** i can drive

 **dkay:** both of you

 **High Quality English:** hey do you guys wanna get wasted after?

 **youneedjisoos:** no, bad

 **mingchef:** no i have to take care of my baby

 **still a traitor:** dont we all have exams lol

**Divaboo:**

**Divaboo:** fucking exa m s ;(

 **the mediator:** lol!! i haven't studied

 **dkay:** tsk

 **dkay:** im gonna laugh if you fail all of your tests

 **the mediator:** ;(

 **Garden Fairy:** oh hey they're on speakign terms again

 **NotThe8:** congrats soonyoung

 **still a traitor:** kek

 **dkay:** you can shut your mouth

 **Garden Fairy:** i'm older than you

 **dkay:** okay, you can shut your mouth hyung*

 **youneedjisoos:** the disrespect

 **youneedjisoos:** i love it

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** So everyone's coming to the mall? good

 **Father:** lmao

 **mingchef:** hey guess what class is next seungkwan

 **Divaboo:** music theory ;)

 **Divaboo:** yes i know

 **High Quality English:** hm

 **High Quality English:** were you planning on jumping me or smth kwannie

 **youneedjisoos:** *choke*

 **NotThe8:** joshua is choking on a dick confirmed

 **youneedjisoos:** what the fuck

 **youneedjisoos** muted the chat

 **dkay:** i dont need this

 **dkay** muted the chat

 **jundaddy:** hey chan

 **jundaddy:** did you see the lisa girl today

 **fanboy:** no.. she wasn't in class ;/

 **NotThe8:** poor boy

 **still a traitor:** you know how jisoo and seokmin are the only single ones in the chat

 **fanboy:** im single!

 **Father:** you're also straight

 **fanboy:** right

 ** ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:****** you think joshie and min are doing the dirty

 **Garden Fairy:** "doing the dirty"

 **mingchef:** dude we should spy on them

 **mingchef:** what if they're also sinners

 **the mediator:** i doubt ittt

 **the mediator:** seokminnie doesn't want a boyfriend

 ** ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:****** Neither does Jisoo

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** But that doesn't mean anything ;)

 **Divaboo:** you guys are

**Divaboo:**

**High Quality English:** gdi boo seungkwan

 **High Quality English:** what'd i say about cringey memes

 **Divaboo:** you said mean girls memes

 **Divaboo:** not kim kardashian

 **jundaddy:** m gonna end it all

 **Garden Fairy:** snort

 **fanboy:** what about michael jackson memes..

 **still a traitor:** those are dead

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** Oh shit

 **fanboy:** GASP

 **fanboy:** GOD I KNOW MICHAEL JACKSONS DEAD OKAY STOP RUBBING IT IN

 **fanboy** left the chat

 **Father:** lol jihoon

 **the mediator:** you dumb idiot!

 **the mediator:** you made my boy sad

 **the mediator:** for fucks saake

 **Garden Fairy:** o dear

 **still a traitor:** i said the memes are dead, not that he's dead

 **jundaddy:**.

 **NotThe8:** s n o r t

 **still a traitor:** soonyoung

 **still a traitor:** why's the bedroom door locked

 **mingchef:** lol damn you really pissed him off

 **the mediator** added  **fanboy** to the chat

 **the mediator:** i'm so sorry my child

 **the mediator:** do you need some hot tea

 **the mediator:** a shoulder to cry on

 **the mediator:** im here

 **fanboy:** :'(

 **fanboy:** it's okay

 **still a traitor:** see

 **the mediator:** lee jihoon dont talk

 **Divaboo:** boyfriends are so cute

 

 

_a/n;_

exo just released kai's teaser for the new album and istg i'm so excited

also red velvet's new album is v good, i recommend listening to the entire thing

summer school starts up again tomorrow, expect slower updates


	18. you're the biggest flop jeonghan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shinee's back  
> shinee's back  
> shinee’s back  
> (back back back back)
> 
> hey lovely readers  
> it's currently the middle of the night and i should be studying but lol  
> also ko ko bop is gonna be released in like 5 days!!!
> 
> thanks for 10k reads <33
> 
> edit; the meanie tag just hit 900 works, lets get to 1000 ;')

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**NotThe8:** hey daddy

 **Father:** its father to you, minghao

 **NotThe8:** FUCK WRONG CHAT

 **Divaboo:** LOL

 **Divaboo:** WERE YOU ABOUT TO SEXT JUN

 **NotThe8:** lol no

 **gyu** changed  **NotThe8** 's name to  **sugarbaby69**

 **gyu:** he totally was btw

 **gyu:** i caught him trying to take a picture of his collarbones

 **sugarbaby69:** hey fuck off

 **jundaddy:** it's not like you and wonwoo haven't done your fair share of that

 **jundaddy:** i have screenshots ;)

 **dkay:** whatthe fuck

 **Garden Fairy:** jun i swear to fucking god

 **jundaddy:** "gyu  ****im sso horny"

 **youneedjisoos:** i was really hoping i could avoid sin today :(

 **gyu:** someday i'm gonna flip my shit and you guys are gonna have to help me hide his body

 **still a traitor:** i mean im down

 ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:**** Are you dumbasses coming to the mall or what

 **sugarbaby69:** yeah yeah

 **sugarbaby69:** blame jun, he still hasn't picked me up yet

 ** ** **oVeRdRaMaTiC:****** Hurry the fukc up

 **jundaddy:** fine b i t ch

 

Jeonghan's convinced that his children are idiots.

It's been some time since they all arrived at the mall, immediately causing a ruckus due to there being only three cars and thriteen college students trying to pack themselves into the seats. Wonwoo's probably been spreading his disease ever since they stepped foot outside, as he's been sneezing nonstop for half an hour and Jeonghan's about ready to stuff cold medicine down his esophagus. Minghao's a whole 'nother story- the slim Chinese boy has been clinging on to Jun's sleeve for at least fifteen minutes, whispering dirty words in his ear and thinking that nobody notices.

All in all, they're a trainwreck, and Jeonghan's suddenly regretting the decision to invite them out shopping in the middle of December. The shopping center itself is packed, crowds of people shoving their way through the open walkways like fish trying to swim upstream. All Jeonghan can hear is the slurred mix of satoori and the squeaking of damp boots; Seoul becomes a bustling hub of tourists during this time of year. He's about 99% certain that he's going to have a headache when he gets home.

His only saving grace is Chan, who's been lightly tugging on his hand the entire time to pull him through the masses of pedestrians along with the rest of their mismatched group. The boy is honestly a saint- which is saying something, coming from the man that refers to himself as  _Angel_ on a daily basis. Even Seungcheol is being his useless oaf self, conversing excitedly with Vernon about some new rap artist that just debuted. "Ugh," Jeonghan scoffs under his breath, tempted to roll his eyes. "Jay whatever-the-fuck is definitely not better than BIGBANG."

He's suddenly tugged in a different direction, nearly tripping over his own feet as they're squashed into another store. This one seems to be high-end, expensive suits lining the walls and diamond bracelets gleaming behind spotless glass cases. Jeonghan really doesn't understand why they've entered this snob paradise, but he's not going to complain either.

Apparently Seungkwan is also confused, because he murmurs a pointed, "Why the fuck did you just lead us into a TNGT store, Joshua," to the brown-haired boy next to him.

Joshua just clicks his tongue, running his slim fingers over the fabric of one of the darker suits and earning a raised eyebrow from the store attendant. "Because, I wanted to imagine how good I'd look in these thousand-dollar masterpieces."

A good portion of their little group either sighs or rolls their eyes, Seokmin grabbing Joshua by the arm to yank him past the establishment's doors. The rest of them follow, Junhui raising an eyebrow at Seokmin's hand still clasped around the elder's arm. Jeonghan nearly whacks Jun in the chest- Joshua would probably never get a boyfriend, especially without getting Jeonghan's  _fabulous_ opinion first. 

Wonwoo then makes a noise of distaste next to him, and Jeonghan narrows his eyes eyes at the younger boy. "Mingyu," he hears, holding back a laugh as he tugs on his boyfriend's sleeve. "I want to go to the bookstore." Seungkwan whips around at that, shaking his finger in indignation and grabbing Wonwoo's hand. He whispers something into the sick boy's ear that Jeonghan can't hear, but he doesn't miss the flash of red that spreads across his cheeks. Mingyu smirks at that reaction.

_What the fuck is wrong with those three?_

 

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**youneedjisoos:** that was fucking boring

 **youneedjisoos:** nobody let me look at suits

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Well it's not my fault that everyone's a flop

 **dkay:** i think you're the biggest flop jeonghan

 **jundaddy:** yes i agree

 **High Quality English:** does anyone know where the fuck mingyu wonwoo nd seungkwan went

 **High Quality English:** kwan took mingyu's car and now i have to ride with you dumbshits

 **sugarbaby69:** wow v e r n o n

 **the mediator:** :( stop the violence

 **Father:** lol i mean he's not wrong, we're all dumbshits

 **still a traitor:** yes true

 **High Quality English:** okay but?? seungkwan

 **jundaddy:** lololol

 **sugarbaby69:** lololol x2

 **fanboy:** i'm so confuseddd..

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Keep your eyes on the road seungCHEOL

 **fanboy:** you too jun!!!

 **jundaddy:** it was a red light

 **Father:** it was a red light

 **High Quality English:** where in the everloving fuck is my boyfriend

 

Seungkwan cackles as he pushes past the door of the shadiest sex store he could find in Hongdae, still grasping Wonwoo's shaky hands. The older freezes for a moment as they enter the shop and are greeted by a young female, her eyebrows raised and fingers curling as she offers a confused wave. A bell rings behind them as Mingyu enters the facility as well, hardly phased by the colorful arrangement of sex toys that line the wall to the left of them. His hands rest on Wonwoo's shoulders, gesturing to the assortment around them.

"This is part of your Christmas present, go crazy."

Wonwoo, after getting over the initial fear of wanting to kill himself for stepping foot in such a shop, let Seungkwan's hand go in favor of walking forward and inspecting a particularly large vibrator. He pokes at it once, flinching as it shifts a bit on the rack. Wonwoo then whips around to glance at the tails and ears of various shapes and sizes across the store, and he makes a beeline for the opposite wall. Mingyu chuckles a bit, following his boyfriend's path. Seungkwan decides to saunter over there as well, eyes lingering on a stray packet of baby pink thigh highs and a bunny tail.

 

****wonwoo wants mingyu's cock** **

**Divaboo:** HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 **Divaboo:** VERNON'S GONNA HAVE A GOOD TIME TONIGHT

 **Garden Fairy:** I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOOK ME TO A FUCKING SEX STORRE

 **Divaboo:** MINGYU'S PLAN I SWEAR

 **sugarbaby69:** wAIT WHAT

 **sugarbaby69:** mY WONU WENT OT A SEX STORE

**jundaddy:**

**Garden Fairy:** i'm still traumatized

 **Garden Fairy:** and mildly excited for later

 **Divaboo:** are you gonna dick mingyu omgg

 **jundaddy:** are you going to do the dick switch?

 **sugarbaby69:** jun please never say 'dick switch' again

 **jundaddy:** dick switch

 **Garden Fairy:** ummmmm kinda?

 **Garden Fairy:** i may have asked him if i can tie him up

 **Garden Fairy:** but uh

 **sugarbaby69:** OMG

 **sugarbaby69:** GUYS HE'S GROWING UP WHAT THE FUCC

 **jundaddy:** my heart

 **Divaboo:** ikr he fucking

 **Divaboo:** i had tears in my eyes when he bought a kitty tail

 **Garden Fairy:** s t o p t a l k i n g a b o u t i t

 **jundaddy:** w8 but won who's gonna top 

 **Garden Fairy:** don't i have to?? since i'm tying him up

 **sugarbaby69:**!!! not necessarily

 **sugarbaby69:** one time i just tied up jun so he couldn't touch me while i bounced on his dick ;)

 **Garden Fairy:** my eyEs

 **jundaddy:** your eyes have been blessed

 **Divaboo:** tmi minghoe ;(

 **jundaddy:** i mean he's not lying

 **jundaddy:** was hot

 **Garden Fairy:** so i don't have to top??

 **Garden Fairy:** ohmygod thank goodness

 **Divaboo:** like

 **Divaboo:** just ride him lol xd

 **Divaboo:** except you gotta be dominant

 **Divaboo:** make him feel good & all that j a z z

 **sugarbaby69:** yes

 **sugarbaby69:** prime goal: make him moan your name ;)))))))))

 **jundaddy:** yes

 **Garden Fairy:** oh

 **Garden Fairy:** but he's already

 **sugarbaby69:** no shhh 

 **sugarbaby69:** i dont need to kno

 **jundaddy:** ya same

 **Divaboo:** me 3

 **Garden Fairy:** wait but dont you guys tell me about your sex all the time what the fuc

 **jundaddy:** pft what no

 **Divaboo:** o so in other news!! i got new thigh highs

 **sugarbaby69:** don't let vernon cum on them again

 **Divaboo:** that's the dream ;*

 **Garden Fairy:**.

 **Divaboo:** also! i'm gonna go drag him to buy panties for me

 **jundaddy:** lols minghao can we buy you panties too

 **Garden Fairy:** wait you're getting them too

 **Garden Fairy:** gyu and i 

 **Garden Fairy:** are gonna go to that new store

 **Divaboo:** saME

 **Divaboo:** lets not go at the same time

 **Garden Fairy:** yes, 100% agree

 **sugarbaby69:** jun i think if i got panties you'd nosebleed all over them so lets not ;')

 **jundaddy:** well shit i mean

 **jundaddy:** yor not wrong

 **sugarbaby69:** when am i ever wrong

 

 

_a/n;_

this picture has me  _ **deceased**_

like do you see the way mingyu's gigantic ass hand is resting over wonwoo's dainty one and they're leaning into eachother so comfortably? i'm trying to tell myself that this ship will never actually be real but god they make it really hard to deny

also, i'm sorry to inform you, but this fic will be ending soon. it's been a great time writing this, and we still have a few chapters left before the end, so don't worry! i plan to start releasing new fics after this one is finished, and i hope you guys will be in for the ride with me. thank you so much for reading this absolute mess of a story, and leaving all of your lovely comments. i really appreciate you all <3


	19. my name is park jimin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey everyone  
> im thinking this story has about 3 more chapters left in it, but i might make it longer eventually who knows. tbh part of the reason im ending it is due to v bad writers block but  
> also i just released 2 other fics for won's birthday, read them if you'd like  
> this one goes out to whoever requested junhao last chapter, i know it's not much but i haven't really written full smut in this story and i don't plan to. i'm planning on writing jeongcheol soon dw  
> enjoy
> 
> also sidenote, anything in mandarin/cantonese is going to be in italics.

_"Jun,"_ Minghao murmurs, fingers tangled in the older's dark hair. He pulls away from the kiss for a moment, lips spit-slicked and heart thumping uncomfortably. It's been like this for what seems like hours. Their limbs are woven together on the mattress, Jun leaning over Minghao with his elbows dug into the sheets. _"Would you mind fucking me?"_

The older quirks an eyebrow, flipping them over so Minghao is resting his lap. He cracks a smile. " _Do you even need to ask?"_

 _"No, but get on with it already."_ Minghao leans back in to press a peck to his kiss-bitten lips, ruffling his hair with his hands and grinding down onto him. Jun groans in response, eyes falling shut as he jerks his hips up to meet Minghao's. They continue with the rhythm for a while, desperate rutting met with sloppy kisses and scrabbling fingers. The older's hands fiddle with the buttons of his boyfriends dress shirt, confused as to why he even put one on for class. As he finally reaches the last button he grows impatient, letting a growl fall past his lips as he wrenches Minghao's shirt off his shoulders. 

Shaking his head as the fabric gets caught on the nearby desk, Minghao lifts his hips up to shimmy out of his skinny jeans. They come off easily, Jun notices, but not fast enough. He lurches forward to pull Minghao back into his embrace after his pants come off. The friction becomes even more dizzying, the only layer of clothing separating them being their boxers. 

A moan falls into the air around them as they grind down onto eachother harder- Minghao's not sure whether it came from him or Jun. All he can distinguish is his boyfriend's sugary voice, urging him on.  _"So good baby, move faster."_ He's bouncing in Jun's lap by that point, and they haven't even shedded their last layer of clothing. The yougner whines as he feels the familar coiling in his stomach, not wanting to stop despite the prospect of Jun fucking him till' he's senseless. It takes a few moments before he freezes, gripping Jun's shoulders as he drops his head back and sees white. Jun slows his hips a moment later, holding back a chuckle as he realizes the hilarity of the situation. Minghao buries his face in Jun's shoulder, still shivering from the orgasm he just had.

_"Did you just come?"_

_"Shut the fuck up and let me suck you off."_

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**fanboy:** hahahahahaha

 **fanboy:** i'm finally in iksan v-v

 **fanboy:** i won't be on here for a little while !! bye guys <3

 **the mediator:** aw, bye channie :(

 **dkay:** seeya innocent one

 **youneedjisoos:** hey i'm not a sinner and i'm still here

 **dkay:** that's true

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Sigh

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Explain to me why I got an 88% on my vocal test

 **Father:** prob from the throat fucking last night

 **jundaddy:** LOL

 **gyu:** wow damn ok

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** FUCK you Choi Seungbitch

 **sugarbaby69** changed  **Father** 's name to  **Seungbitch**

 **Seungbitch:** i mean ok

 **Seungbitch:** it's your fault for asking me to throat fuck you the night before a vocal test

 **Seungbitch:** dummy

 **still a traitor:** i'm done

 **dkay:** dude can someone shoot me in the head

 **youneedjisoos:** i'll do it

 **youneedjisoos:** we can shoot eachother

 **dkay:** sounds like a plan

 **Garden Fairy:** what day is it tomorrow

 **Divaboo:** s@turday

 **Garden Fairy:** mingyu we're going shopping tomorrow

 **sugarbaby69:** ohoho are you gonna drag him to buy panties

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **gyu:** yes

**sugarbaby69:**

**jundaddy:** hey hao have you recovered from coming in your pants this morning

 **sugarbaby69** left the chat

 **Seungbitch:** lol

 **Divaboo:** LOL HE CAME IN HIS PANTS

 **jundaddy:** hey i mean i'm pretty hot i'd come in my pants too

 **Garden Fairy** added  **sugarbaby69** to the chat

 **Garden Fairy:** jun's a fuckin whore isn't he

 **sugarbaby69:** yes

 **sugarbaby69:** did you recover from my bomb ass tongue?

 **sugarbaby69:** remember how you came in 5 minutes ;)

 **jundaddy** left the chat

 **Garden Fairy:** nobody invite him back

 **still a traitor:** ^

 **youneedjisoos:** 1 sin down, 7 billion to go

 **dkay:** :((( i promise im not a sinner josssh

 **youneedjisoos:** okok minus you

 **the mediator** added  **jundaddy** to the chat

 **the mediator:** for fucks sake, be nice!

 **the mediator:** i'll hit all of you with a spoon!

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Ahem, that's my job Soonyoung

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Fuck off my motherly duties

**oVeRdRaMaTiC:**

**High Quality English:** istg these stale memes

 **sugarbaby69:** they were never fresh to begin with

 **youneedjisoos:** is that katy perry

 **youneedjisoos:** iconic

 **jundaddy:** you know hao

 **jundaddy:** i never did get around to fucking you

 **jundaddy:** wanna?

 **sugarbaby69:** ye lets go

 **Divaboo:** werent they pissed at eachother 5 secs ago

 **gyu:** yeah

 **gyu:** as long as they're not fucking on my couch idc what happens

 **still a traitor:** what if they fuck in your bed

 **Garden Fairy:**..

 **Garden Fairy:** i really hope they won't do that cause uuh

 **High Quality English:** cause you and mingyu have prob already fucked up that bed

 **gyu:** just a little

 **dkay:** you know how i said psychology fucking sucks

 **the mediator:** you say that a lotttt

 **dkay:** it still fucking sucks

 **dkay:** i got an a

 **dkay:** thanks wonwoo

 **Garden Fairy:** yw

 **Garden Fairy:** you studied hard then??

 **dkay:** yes

 **dkay:** one more favor though..?

 **Garden Fairy:** ok

 **Divaboo:** this chat suddenly got super boring

 **dkay:** can i see your lecture notes for um, confirmation bias

 **Garden Fairy** sent a file

 **gyu:** aw my bf's so nice

 **gyu:** cute

 **Garden Fairy:** leaf me alone

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** You know what

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Fuck college

**still a traitor:**

**still a traitor:** fUcK cOLLegE

 **still a traitor:** i'm stuck in a fucking studio all day, stop complaining

 **still a traitor:** all of you

 **the mediator:** yes i agree

 **Divaboo:** soon weren't you complaining about classes like yesterday

 **the mediator:** shh

 **Seungbitch:** i mean it does suck to be cooped up in a studio all day ngl

 **gyu:** minghao and jun are off fucking rn right

 **Garden Fairy:**.. right

 **gyu:** you know what we should do

 **Garden Fairy:** not fuck :)

 **gyu:** i s t f g

 **Divaboo:** mingyu got finessed

 **High Quality English:** why am i not surprised

 **gyu:** hey you're supposed to be on my side

 **gyu:** technically i set you two idiots up

 **still a traitor:** lol he's not wrong

 **Divaboo:** sigh this is so dry

 **Divaboo:** is there anyone else we can add to this shithole chat

 **still a traitor:**.

 **still a traitor** added  **agust d(ead inside)**

 **still a traitor:** hey yoong

 **agust d(ead inside):** oh hey

 **agust d(ead inside):** that you woozi?

 **still a traitor:** yup

 **agust d(ead inside):** what is this

 **Divaboo:** hell ;))

 **Divaboo:** my name is boo seungkwan and i'm the resident hoe here <3

 **agust d(ead inside):** oh nice

 **High Quality English:** i heard you make mixtapes

 **High Quality English:** we should collab

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** *shakes head*

 **still a traitor:** ignore vernon, his mixtape is trash

 **agust d(ead inside):**.. cool

 **the mediator:** vernon you already scared him >:(

 **High Quality English:** l o l

 **agust d(ead inside):** so why am i here?

 **still a traitor:** they were complaining about being bored so i figured why not add you

 **still a traitor:** you can leave if you want

 **agust d(ead inside):** nah its chill

 **Seungbitch:** you twat children should introduce yourselves, yoongi is a hyung

 **agust d(ead inside):** i like this guy

 **Seungbitch:** hi, i'm choi seungcheol, the dad of the group

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** I'm his husband, Yoon Jeonghan. Nice to meet you! :)

 **agust d(ead inside):** oh damn you're married in college???

 **still a traitor:** no, they're fuckin lying

 **still a traitor:** they pretend they are

 **the mediator:** will you marry me, jihoonie? ~

 **agust d(ead inside):**. i'm assuming that's kwon soonyoung

 **the mediator:** you guessed right!! 

 **Garden Fairy:** uuh it's wonwoo, you know me obviously

 **Garden Fairy:** i'll introduce jun, minghao, and chan since they're not here.

 **Garden Fairy:** wen junhui is "jundaddy", xu minghao is "sugarbaby69" and lee chan is fanboy

 **Garden Fairy:** i'll have you know it physically hurt me to type out those names

 **agust d(ead inside):** oh boy

 **agust d(ead inside):** didn't know you were friends with jihoon, wonwoo

 **youneedjisoos:** i'm hong jisoo, or joshua hong

 **youneedjisoos:** i hate everyone in this chat except seokmin and chan

 **dkay:** i'm seokmin

 **dkay:** lee seokmin

 **agust d(ead inside):** so many names

 **agust d(ead inside):** not to be rude but i'm prob going to get confused a lot

 **Seungbitch:** that's okay, i get confused too

 **Seungbitch:** it's hard to keep track of 11 children

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** I'm their ,,,"pretend" mother >;(

 **agust d(ead inside):** cool, is that everyone?

 **gyu:** sorry forgot

 **gyu:** i'm kim mingyu, wonwoo's boyfriend and a 6'1 giant, we've met before

 **agust d(ead inside):** christ 

 **agust d(ead inside):** i'm 5'9 but all my friends are taller than me so i'm used to it lmao

 **agust d(ead inside):** and yeah i remember you

 **still a traitor:** what about jimin

 **agust d(ead inside):** oh, right, he's a midget

 **the mediator:** compared to jihoon he probably isn't ;)

 **still a traitor:** soonyoung i'll fucking beat you

 **Divaboo:** he'd probably enjoy it xddd

 **agust d(ead inside):** lol

 **agust d(ead inside):** speaking of jimin, mind if i invite him to this? our normal gc's been pretty quiet lately

 **dkay:** go for it

 **agust d(ead inside)** added  **CHIM CHIM BITCHES** to the chat

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** hey hoes

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** my name is park jimin ;)

 **Divaboo:**.. i like him

**  
**

_  
_

_  
_

**_important a/n;_ **

i seriously can't convey to all of you in words how much respect and love i have for jeon wonwoo. i tear up like 95% of the time i see a video of him and realize that i'll probably never talk to him, which is ?? very dramatic of me but that's not the point. he deserves the world. he deserves so much love. i really hope he's happy and will be happy for the rest of his life. he's very talented as well, and i'm so proud of him because he's come such a long way, and even though i haven't stanned seventeen for a long time, it's because of him that they're my ult. bias group. please never sleep on him or what he does, because he's such a talented performer and person overall. ngl this note is word vomit that i'm typing out in the middle of the night because  _wow_ i really just can't believe how amazing wonwoo is. still can't believe he's already 21 years old.

in short, i love him so much. maybe someday i'll touch his hand. we'll see. let me know if he winks at any of you or something at diamond edge and we can freak out over it together ahah

readers, please make sure to rest and eat well and drink lots of water. i hope all of you are healthy and have a good rest of your day/night.

also, remember how i said this was ending soon? i'm thinking of making it longer

<33


	20. i really don't have a will to live anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eyy im back and feeling way better than i did a week ago  
> i finished summer semester, so now i have about 2 weeks until i go back to the regular school year. (kill me)  
> thank you for all of your comments on the authors note i left, they really helped actually ^^ i'm grateful for having such amazing readers  
> also!! jjp verse 2 drops in two days and i'm beyond excited,, i pre-ordered my album like 5 days ago  
> updates are still gonna be relatively slow.. i have an exam to study for already so
> 
> WARNING: there's a suggestive picture in here um wAtch out if youre not comfortable with that!

 

**the 12 music kinks + chan**

**dkay** changed the chat name to  **stop the sin 2k17**

 **dkay:** that chat name was getting old

 **Garden Fairy:** oh i finally got around to bringing mingyu to that store

 **gyu:** i'm like

 **gyu:** not going to recover jfc

 **gyu:** you would not believe

 **still a traitor:** spare me the details please, i love you guys but i don't need to know what he looks like in lace

 **the mediator:** aw i love you too baby

 **still a traitor:** what did i say about calling me that

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** omg lace????

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** i waant

 **agust d(ead inside):**.

 **Seungbitch:** oh i forgot we had new people here

 **Divaboo:** you're jimin right? ^_^

 **High Quality English:** that face is dangerous uh

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** yes~ you are?

 **Divaboo:** i'm boo seungkwan <3

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** oh!! are you in my music theory class?

 **gyu:** why is literally everyone in our mt class

 **gyu:** i don't understand

 **Divaboo:** i am!

 **Divaboo:** are you the one with pink hair?

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** mhm

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** you have blonde hair right??

 **Divaboo:** :O you know who i am?

 **Divaboo:** that's so cooool

 **agust d(ead inside):** not really, considering he's a junior taking a freshman class

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** shut uP yoong

 **jundaddy:** you know

 **jundaddy:** minghao also looks good in lace

 **Garden Fairy:** shut your mouth

 **Garden Fairy:** supposed to be supporting my lace endeavors

 **sugarbaby69:** "endeavors"

 **sugarbaby69:** its ok won, you prob look better in them

 **Garden Fairy:** thanks hao

 **jundaddy:** since when did you guys become b e s t f r i e n d s

 **Garden Fairy:** well i mean,, you're a hoe

 **gyu:** mi nghao

 **gyu:** did he learn that from you

 **sugarbaby69:** you kno he's not a baby right, he knows the word hoe

 **gyu:** but he's my baby

 **agust d(ead inside):** i mean in mingyu's defense, i have never heard wonwoo say the word hoe

 **Divaboo:** how do you bitches manage to make this chat boring even when there's someone like jimin here

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** you're sweet~

 **dkay:** where's joshua

 **dkay:** my head hurts from looking at this

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Do you miss him??

 **jundaddy:** im tellin you jeonghan

 **jundaddy:** somethings going on

 **dkay:** i just want the sin to end

 **youneedjisoos:** did i hear the word sin?

 **Garden Fairy:** s i g h

 **youneedjisoos:** get your bitch ass the fuck outta here wonwoo

 **gyu:** hey, what the fuck

 **youneedjisoos:** he knows what he did

 **Garden Fairy:** i didn't even tell you what the panties looked like ok

 **Garden Fairy:** i just said the word "lace"

 **Garden Fairy:** if anything seungkwan should be yelled at for showing us his thigh highs

 **Divaboo:** hEYY no throwing me under the bus

 **Divaboo:** and i thought you liked those??

**dkay:**

**agust d(ead inside):** same

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** omf you like thigh highs too???

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** yoongi how did you never introduce me to him

 **agust d(ead inside):** lol, he's jihoons friend i just met him

 **still a traitor:** "friend" is a stretch

 **Divaboo:** love me :(

 **the mediator:** i love you seungkwan!

 **Divaboo:** <3

 **youneedjisoos:** i miss channie

 **youneedjisoos:** he's so cute and innocent, unlike the rest of you :(

**Seungbitch:**

**Seungbitch:** does that help

 **sugarbaby69:** rip lee chan never forget

 **dkay:** he's nOt dEaD

 **youneedjisoos:** he's so cute :((((( but then i see your ugly mug

 **youneedjisos:** and suddenly the picture is ruined

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Wow look at Cheollie <3

 **Seungbitch:** rude

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** So handsome

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** aw cute!

 **Seungbitch:** lol guys jeonghan loves me today

 **High Quality English:** what a miracle

 **Garden Fairy:**... mingyu

 **gyu:** wht

 **Garden Fairy:** you should. hold on

 **agust d(ead inside):** im confused

 **jundaddy:** is won going to bamboozle him

 

**wonWOAH**

**gyu:** whats up

 **gyu:** something wrong?

 **Garden Fairy:** um well you see

**Garden Fairy:**

**Garden Fairy:** does this look good? i couldn't move my phone enough to show you more..

 **gyu:** WONWOO

 **gyu:** JESUS

 **gyu:** FUCKING

 **gyu:** CHRIST

 **gyu:** IM IN CLASS 

 **gyu:** YES YOU LOOK GOOD

 **gyu:** DEAR LORD

 **Garden Fairy:** oh ok

 **Garden Fairy:** come home and you might see the rest

 **gyu:** i swear to fucking 

 **gyu:** you tease

 **Garden Fairy:** i have no idea what you're talking about

 

 

**hey how you doin lil mama**

**taebaby:** HEY WHERE IS EVERYONE

 **taebaby:** THIS GROUPCHAT IS FUCKIN DEAD

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** yoongs and i found a better group~

 **jay hoepe:** gasp excuse me

 **jay hoepe:** we're the best groupchat ok

 **agust d(ead inside):** lol funny

 **rap monsta (x):** yoongi i feel betrayed

 **rap monsta (x):** only minhyuk can save me now

 **rap monsta (x):** we even had matching parentheses in our names

 **agust d(ead inside):** we still both have parentheses

 **the other seok:** who's minhyuk??? are you cheating on me

 **rap monsta (x):** no he's a monsta x member

 **rap monsta (x):** o b v i o u s l y

 **the other seok:** sometimes i think you love kpop more than me

 **taebaby:** where's jungkookie :(

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** in clASS you dumb

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** how come i know where he is even though he's your boyfriend

 **taebaby:** bcus you're his best friend????

 **taebaby:** he never tells me anythin ;///

 **jay hoepe:** i meaaaaaan tbh we cant trust you with secrets taehyung ;)

 **cook:** hey guys

 **cook:** i think i just failed korean 101

 

**stop the sin 2k17**

**gyu:** i just had a fucking brain malfunction

 **gyu:** i cant live

 **gyu:** someone give me cpr

 **sugarbaby69:** ew no make wonwoo do that

 **gyu:** he's the fucking pRoBLeM

 **Garden Fairy:** wdym? i didn't do anything

 **youneedjisoos:** i sense sin

 **youneedjisoos:** mingyu do you need holy water? it's homemade

 **gyu:** no i need to sue victoria's secret

 **jundaddy:** OH i see

 **sugarbaby69:** smh

 **sugarbaby69:** gyu if you can't handle the lace don't buy it

 **dkay:** i really really really want to shoot myself

 **the mediator:** that's not good seokminnie :( love yourself

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** ^

 **Garden Fairy:** i plead innocence

 **jundaddy:** snort

 **jundaddy:** "innocence"

 **Garden Fairy:** you're supposed to back me up, "best friend" my ass

 **jundaddy:** </3

 **gyu:** i just

 **Divaboo:** LOL w8 A MINUTE

 **Divaboo:** is that why mingyu started hyperventilating in class????

 **still a traitor:**.

 **Garden Fairy:** pffff im telling you i didn't do anything

 **agust d(ead inside):** i mean

 **agust d(ead inside):** its probably not as bad as some of the stuff jimin has sent me.. in class

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:** shhhh

 **High Quality English:** it's probably not as bas as some of the stuff seungkwan and i do after class

 **High Quality English:** or during class

 **dkay:** i-

 **youneedjisoos:** i cant

 **youneedjisoos:** please drown yourselves in an ocean of holy water

 **Divaboo:** tbh im not going to deny that we've done some gross shit in class but i got a glimpse of that picturee

 **gyu:** i'm done talking about it

 **gyu:** i just want to go home

 **sugarbaby69:** why so wonwoo can give you his ass

 **gyu:** yes

 **gyu:** exactly

 **jundaddy:** hot

 **jundaddy:** minghao do i get your ass too?

 **sugarbaby69:**.

 **sugarbaby69:** you're a thirsty piece of shit

 **sugarbaby69:** but yeah obviously

 **youneedjisoos:** i really don't have a will to live anymore

 

 

_a/n;_

you guys should stan topsecret

<http://imgur.com/oqR8TuB> << (cough spoilers for my next story)

sorry this is t r a s h i'm not up for writing out of chat right now </3

also! the bts cameos wont last forever! dont worry, this isnt turning into a bts fic lol. i know not everyone here listens to them so it's probably going to stay a seventeen only fic unless you guys want me to throw in bts. let me know if you do.


	21. my children are like rabbits

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my exo album came in the mail and i ended up getting xiumins poster and photocard which is fucking amazing bc he's one of my biases  
> i don't understand how i got so lucky there lol, with my al1 album i didnt get any wonwoo or mingyu stuff  
> also, this took me longer than i thought it would, my apologies. my mother had surgery earlier this week and i've been caught up trying to help her through that, so i didn't have much time to write.  
> anyways, i hope everyone's having a good day/night. thanks for reading!

**hey how you doin lil mama**

**taebaby:** park

 **taebaby:** chim

 **taebaby:** chim

 **taebaby:** i'm goingtokillyou

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES:**????????? what did i dO

 **taebaby:** betrayal :(

 **cook:**. i'd hide if i were you jimin

 **agust d(ead inside):** im confused

 **taebaby:** :))))))))))))))))))

 

 

**stop the sin 2k17**

**Divaboo:** so like

 **Divaboo:** do bees have sex

 **sugarbaby69:** bees again????

 **jundaddy:** lol what is it with you and bees

 **Seungbitch:** vernon, how wasted is seungkwan

 **High Quality English:** i mean

 **High Quality English:** i didn't have to carry him home from the club, so..

 **Divaboo:** lol!! im not drunk

 **Divaboo:** jus wanna know if bees fuck

 **gyu:** thats definitely not a normal question

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Sometimes I get why Shua is disappointed in you all :)

 **youneedjisoos:** :):):):):):):)

 **CHIM CHIM BITCHES** left the chat

 **dkay:** see, you scared that jimin guy away

 **agust d(ead inside):** uuuh actually i think

 **agust d(ead inside):** i think taehyung got to his phone... 

 **agust d(ead inside):** he's prob jealous that jimin has actual friends

 **Divaboo:** uguggu

 **Divaboo:** i liked him!!!

 **High Quality English:** but you like me more

 **Divaboo:** maybe not ;)

 **agust d(ead inside):**. on that note

 **Garden Fairy:** vernon i really hope u cut seungkwan's alcohol supply

 **agust d(ead inside):** it was nice to meet you all

 **agust d(ead inside):** but i think im gonna return to the other dumb chat before tae has my ass or smth

 **still a traitor:** was nice to have you yoongi

 **still a traitor:** keep me updated, lol

 **sugarbaby69:** you're acting like he's moving away or something

 **jundaddy:** d e p r e s s i n g

 **agust d(ead inside):** i will, seeya

 **agust d(ead inside)** left the chat

 **dkay:** uknow jun

 **dkay:** i've noticed that you always chime in after minghao

 **dkay:** are you like, texting while in the middle of fucking or something

 **jundaddy:** yeah bc we take text breaks right in the middle of him giving oral

 **jundaddy:** that totally makes sense

 **gyu:** lol fuckin weirdo

 **Garden Fairy:** ngl though ive absolutely seen them texting during sex

 **Garden Fairy:** i dont know how they do that but??

 **sugarbaby69:** just gotta make sure juns hhhhuge dick doesnt get in the way and its super easy to text everyone ;]

 **youneedjisoos:** i really did not want to know

 **jundaddy:** minghaO you're exposing us wtf

 **sugarbaby69:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 **sugarbaby69:** can i suck dick now kthx

 **Divaboo:** ooh me too

 **Seungbitch:**. my children are like rabbits

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** yOUR CHILDREN?

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** The custody is shared, thanks

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** :)

 **Seungbitch:** you know there's a reason why your name is 'overdramatic'

 **Garden Fairy:** so it's midterms week

 **the mediator:** ugh dont remind me

 **dkay:** hey, soonyoung's alive

 **gyu:** a miracle

 **still a traitor:** i dont know if alive is the right term

 **the mediator:** more like drowning myself in vodka and essays

 **the mediator:** i havent left my room the entire fucking weekend

 **still a traitor:**.. yeah

 **youneedjisoos:** at least you have jihoon this time

 **youneedjisoos:** to hopefully drown with you <3

 **dkay:** hopefully

 **still a traitor:** i thought you weren't mad at us anymore lmao

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Please don't wish death upon your brothers

 **Garden Fairy:** "brothers"

 **jundaddy:** wouldn't that be incest

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC** removed  **jundaddy** from the chat

 **oVeRdRaMaTiC:** Sorry, I had to take out the trash.

 

**wonwoo wants mingyu's cock**

**jundaddy:** guys tell jeongmom to add me back :((((

 **Divaboo:** lol! no.

 **jundaddy:** :((((((((

 **sugarbaby69:** only if you let me have my tail back

 **jundaddy:** but

 **jundaddy:** i was saving it for christmas

 **sugarbaby69:** lol! too bad

 **Divaboo:** lol!

 **Garden Fairy:** lol! i'll add you back if you change his name to jeongmom

 **jundaddy:** fuckin deal

 **Garden Fairy:** and if you change the chat name to something that's not "wonwoo wants mingyu's cock"

 **sugarbaby69:** not happening

 **Divaboo:** not happening

 **jundaddy:** not happening

 **Garden Fairy:** please rot in hell

 **jundaddy:** you love me <3

 

**stop the sin 2k17**

**Garden Fairy** added  **jundaddy** to the chat

 **jundaddy** changed  **oVeRdRaMaTiC** 's name to  **jEoNgMoM**

 **jundaddy:** the power of best friends ;)

 **still a traitor:** you're cringey

 **youneedjisoos:** ^

 **Garden Fairy:** yeah i agree

 **jundaddy:** wwwhtthdhudfi you're supposed to back me up wOOwOO

 **jEoNgMoM:** Why's he back here :(

 **Seungbitch:** it's ok jun, i still love you

 **sugarbaby69:** same

 **jundaddy:** thank s

 **High Quality English:** you know

 **High Quality English:** jun i feel like this would be you

**High Quality English:**

**jundaddy:** the fuck, i cant even read that

 **youneedjisoos:** haha

 **youneedjisoos:** this is why vernon's a good kid

 **High Quality English:** "kid"

 **sugarbaby69:** ok but can we stop flaming jun so i can like

 **sugarbaby69:** get that good dick tonight

 **gyu:** i bet you good money jun doesn't have a nice dick

**jundaddy:**

**fanboy:** i come back to visit the chat and the first thing i see is park jinyoung crying :(

 **dkay:** CHAN

 **youneedjisoos:** HI CHANNIE HOW ARE YOU PLEASE CLEANSE THE SINS WITH US

 **fanboy:** hi!

 **Seungbitch:** hello my youngest child

 **fanboy:** iksan is really pretty in the winter~

 **fanboy:** so i can't stay for long!

 **fanboy:** but i hope everyone's having a good week

 **fanboy:** study hard <3

 **dkay:** i wanna throw myself off a cliff

 **dkay:** but i'll study hard!!!

 **the mediator:** hey channnn

 **the mediator:** have fun at home :)

 **the mediator:** i might not be alive when you get back :)

 **still a traitor:**. 

 **Garden Fairy:** lol im a dual major and im not complaining stfu

 **gyu:** i mean

 **gyu:** ive also been giving you presents because you're studying so hard

 **gyu:** so that probably helps

 **sugarbaby69:** pReSeNtS

**sugarbaby69:**

****

**gyu:** oh shut up

 **gyu:** you get dicked on a daily basis too

 **jundaddy:** this is a truth

 **youneedjisoos:** i just came out here to have a good time

 **youneedjisoos:** & as per usual i have the overwhelming urge to bash your heads in with a bible

 

 

 

_a/n;_

happy birthday girls generation <3

please go support the new winner and snsd comebacks! they're really good so i recommend at least giving them a listen

sidenote: i hate this chapter it was super rushed and sloppily put together please dont kill me :')


	22. that would be an insult to the han river

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> motivation to write? who's she?  
> heres jeongcheol??? kind of???

Jeonghan burrows further into Seungcheol's embrance, letting his hair get tangled in the older's fingers. It's the last day before Cheol leaves for Daegu, and Jeonghan's determined to spend every second of it clinging onto his boyfriend.

The long-haired whines when Seungcheol moves to get out of bed, muttering about having to get an essay done before he leaves. Jeonghan slaps him on the arm before grabbing him, sending them both tumbling back into the sheets. The younger moves to sit atop Seungcheol's thighs, shaking his pointer finger in his face. This is  _their_ day, and Jeonghan's not going to let his boyfriend even think about school.

"You're staying in bed with me all day."

"Jeonghan, my essay."

"Did you not hear me the first time? You're staying in this fucking bed, and if you try to escape, I'll make sure you don't get laid for two months."

"But.. essay."

"I'll make it a year."

Seungcheol raises an eyebrow at that, putting his hands up in defeat. "Fine, but we need to eat breakfast first. I'm starving."

"Eat my ass then?" Jeonghan spreads his legs further, grasping Seungcheol's wrist and laying it on his thigh. "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, right?"

With an eye roll and a pat to Jeonghan's thigh, Seungcheol's off the bed in a second, making his way towards the door. "Which is why I'm going to make pancakes, and not eat you out."

 

**stop the sin 2k17**

**jEoNgMoM:** I hate Choi Seungcheol

 **jEoNgMoM:** AND his stupid pancakes

 **jEoNgMoM:** If you wanted something flat you could've just dated Jihoon :/

 **jundaddy:** LOL

 **still a traitor:** uh? explain

 **the mediator:** JIHOON ISNT FLAT

 **the mediator:** I HAVE EVIDENCE

 **youneedjisoos:** dear lord please no

 **dkay:**?????////????/?/?? proof that soonyoung is still a hoe?

 **Garden Fairy:** i'm like... genuinely confused as to how you can ruin a conversation in 2 seconds jeonghan

 **jEoNgMoM:** Blame my boyfriend :)

 **Seungbitch:** han

 **Seungbitch:** lol

 **Seungbitch:** i just wanted some fucking food

 **Seungbitch:** your ass is not a healthy breakfast

 **High Quality English:** i mean idk ass is pretty healthy to me

 **youneedjisoos** removed  **High Quality English** from the chat

 **jundaddy:** i wish haohao let me have his ass for breakfast :((

 **youneedjisoos** removed  **jundaddy** from the chat

**youneedjisoos:**

 

 **youneedjisoos:** took out the trash guys!

 **gyu:** you forgot someone

 **youneedjisoos:** you're right

 **youneedjisoos** removed  **gyu** from the chat

 **youneedjisoos:** my work here is done

 **sugarbaby69:** hey now

 **sugarbaby69:** its not jun's fault i have a nice ass

 **the mediator** added  **jundaddy, gyu,** and  **High Quality English** to the chat

 **the mediator:** how many times have i said no fighting >:(

 **jundaddy:** yeah jisoo

 **jundaddy:** no fighting >:(

 **gyu:** >:(

 **sugarbaby69:** >:(

 **Divaboo:** imo vernonie deserved it ;)

 **High Quality English:** yeah i prob did

 **still a traitor:** i still don't understand the whole pancakes thing

 **jEoNgMoM:** :))

 **dkay:** this is why we need chan in the chat

 **dkay:** fffffuck this shit

**jundaddy:**

 

**wonWOAH**

**Garden Fairy:** he y wanna sext

 **gyu:** uh yes

 **gyu:** do you even need to ask

 **Garden Fairy:** no

 **Garden Fairy:** but i wanna try somthin

 **gyu:**?

 **Garden Fairy** sent an image

 **Garden Fairy:** do i look pretty daddy?

 **gyu:** oh

 **gyu:** fuck

 **gyu:** you're springing that on me right now?

 **Garden Fairy:** mmhm

 **Garden Fairy:** minghao said he calls jun that

 **gyu:**.. dont take sex advice from minghao

 **gyu:** but

 **gyu:** yes baby, you always look pretty

 **gyu:** especially in lace like that, all for me

 **Garden Fairy:** only for you

 **gyu:** fingn ewheowhp iieeiq

 **gyu:** wjwiwkslfqpqf

 **Garden Fairy:**... gyu?

 **Garden Fairy:** are you dying?

 **Garden Fairy:** do i need to call an ambulance?

 **Garden Fairy:** gyugyu??

 **Garden Fairy:** hello?

 **gyu:** hi bbiittch

 **gyu:** i stole mingay's phone ;)

 **gyu:** it's seungkwan by the way!!

 **gyu:** stop being nasty!! :)

 **Garden Fairy:**... oh

 **Garden Fairy:**.. don't look at that picture please..

 **gyu:** too late!

 

**stop the sin 2k17**

**Divaboo:** i caught minwon sexting wow

 **Divaboo:** they're fucking g r o s s

 **High Quality English:**  but we sext

 **youneedjisoos:** ugh

**sugarbaby69:**

****

**sugarbaby69:** congrats seungkwan, you just witnessed hell

 **Garden Fairy:** leave me alone

 **Garden Fairy:** it's all mingyu's fault

 **gyu:**???? but seungkwan's the one that took my phone

 **Garden Fairy:** its your fault for letting him take it

 **jEoNgMoM:** Why are my children fighting

 **jEoNgMoM:** I already have a headache, be quiet

 **jundaddy:** incest

 **Divaboo:** snort!

 **jEoNgMoM** removed  **jundaddy** from the chat

 **jEoNgMoM:** yawn

 **Seungbitch:** my husband is petty

 **still a traitor:** you're just realizing this?

 **Seungbitch:** hell no

 **Seungbitch:** i knew he was petty the second i saw him

 **sugarbaby69:** snort

 **gyu:** snort x600

 **jEoNgMoM:** At least I have a nice ass

 **the mediator:** i have receipts ok

 **the mediator:** RECEIPTS

 **still a traitor:** stop lying to yourself

 **still a traitor:** i really do not have an ass

 **dkay:** i literally

 **dkay:** want to jump off a bridge

 **dkay:** into the han river

 **sugarbaby69:** that would be an insult to the han river

 

 

 

_a/n;_

meanie is the first seventeen ship to hit 1000 works on archive & that makes me really happy

sorry for being gone for so long,,, i was focused on surviving the first week of classes and working on my new story so

sidenote, i've started disliking every chapter i write for this more and more which is why i'm ending it soon (at 25 chapters)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kb24RrHIbFk <<<< this is important, it's the music video for the song i based 1800 and 273-8255 off of

quick question, do you guys read primarily on mobile or desktop? personally, i read on mobile more, so i'm kind of curious


	23. please tell me you're not dying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi hello im drowning in tissues i love being sick a g a i n
> 
> go read my new fic i'm workin real hard on it: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11652855/chapters/26216547
> 
> two more chapters to go
> 
> sidenote my favorite gtop fic got deleted so ive been sulking trying to find another good gtop fic and i've had no luck :( which sucks because i really love gtop & bigbang and i dont talk about them enough

**stop the sin 2k17**

**Divaboo** added  **jundaddy** to the chat

 **Divaboo:** hey so what in the FRESH FUCK do you guys want for christmas

 **the mediator:** A DOG

 **Garden Fairy:** lol most of us aren't even in seoul rn

 **Garden Fairy:** how would you even give us presents

 **Divaboo** changed  **Garden Fairy** 's name to **dont** **killmyvibe**

 **Divaboo:** stfu you emo

 **gyu:** hey

 **gyu:** its like 8 in the fuckin morning shut up

 **gyu:** and don't call my boyfriend an emo

 **Seungbitch:** lol mingyu its almost 16:00

 **still a traitor:** this is true

 **youneedjisoos:**....

 **sugarbaby69:** snort wow

 **sugarbaby69:** mingyu's lazy as fuck confirmed!

 **dontkillmyvibe:** actually i made him sleep

 **dontkillmyvibe:** he got drunk off his ass so

 **gyu:** not True

 **jundaddy:** tbh i believe wonwoo

 **Divaboo:** smae

 **still a traitor:** "smae"

 **jEoNgMoM:** Smae

**Divaboo:**

**Divaboo:** same*

 **Divaboo:** fuck offffffffffff

 **High Quality English** changed  **Divaboo** 's name to  **SMAE**

 **SMAE:** fine ugh

 **SMAE:** nobody deserves a christmas present

 **fanboy:** what about me!!!!

 **SMAE:** except chan

 **dkay:** what did i do tho

 **SMAE:** guilty by association >:(

**dkay:**

****

**dkay:** im not about to be attacked

 **Seungbitch:** so how did everyone score on their exams

 **sugarbaby69:** omg please dont talk about exams

 **sugarbaby69:** its winter break i havent even tried to check my grades ok

 **jundaddy:** (he's been too busy sucking my dick)

 **youneedjisoos:** (ew) :)))))))))))))

 **fanboy:** i did good!!!!!

 **dkay:** i think im switching majors

 **dkay:** i cant wait to watch my money disappear

 **High Quality English:** what money

 **dkay:** e x a c t l y

 **the mediator:** ,,,,,, what major are you switching to??

 **dkay:** um i was actually thinking vocal comp

 **dkay:** like seungkwanie and jeongmom

 **SMAE:** scoff stealing my major

 **SMAE:** leeeeeavveeeee bbbbb iiitttchhh

 **jEoNgMoM:** I will not tolerate bullying in MY HOUSE

 **still a traitor:** "my house"

 **jundaddy:** "bullying"

 **jEoNgMoM:** I hate you both!

 **jEoNgMoM:** (:

 **jundaddy:** scary

**Seungbitch:**

**sugarbaby69:** wow dad used a gif

 **jundaddy:** fucking Excuse Me

 **jundaddy:** you said im your daddy

 **youneedjisoos:** oh for fucks sake

 **Seungbitch:** there's a large difference between dad and daddy

 **jundaddy:** you right

 **jundaddy:** daddy = big dick, dad = small dick

 **SMAE:** LOL

 **jEoNgMoM:** I agree

 **Seungbitch:** why am i being bullied

 **Seungbitch:** save me jeonghan

 **sugarbaby69:**.....

 **sugarbaby69:** istg ugh

 **High Quality English:** w8 so if seungkwan calls me daddy i just inhenrently have a huge dick?

 **youneedjisoos:** i repeat: oh for fucks sake

 **High Quality English:** becuz if so sign me up

 **SMAE:** you already have a big dick <3

 **High Quality English:** <3

 

 

**stop the sin 2k17**

**gyu:** hey so uhhhhhhhhh

 **gyu:** anyone got money

 **gyu:** i kind of ran out of gas

 **Seungbitch:**... i'm in daegu kid

 **Seungbitch:** can't really help you there sorry

 **dontkillmyvibe:** there's just.. a small problem

 **youneedjisoos:** what the fuck did you guys do

 **jundaddy:** do i needa bail you out of jail mingay and/or wonwow

 **jundaddy:** im not in china yet

 **sugarbaby69:** same

 **gyu:** mm no

 **gyu:** unless you'd associate motels with jail

 **gyu:** if thats the case, then, yes

 **sugarbaby69:** wdym why r u in a motel

 **dontkillmyvibe:** mingyu's parents didn't take the whole.. gay thing well

 **dontkillmyvibe:** they don't really like me either... :/

 **jEoNgMoM:** What?

 **jEoNgMoM:** Mingyu, you hadn't come out to your parents yet and you brought your /boyfriend/ to Anyang??????

 **gyu:** i... thought they would take it better to be honest

 **the mediator:** what??? thats awful

 **the mediator:** i would help you guys if i wasnt in busan..

 **jundaddy:** fuck, are you guys okay though?

 **sugarbaby69:** please tell me you're not dying

**Seungbitch: ^^**

**dontkillmyvibe:** kinda okay, not dying

 **dontkillmyvibe:** just sucks.

 **dontkillmyvibe:** a lot

 **dontkillmyvibe:** i only cried a little

 **gyu:** i got drunk instead

 **gyu:** i mean at least my sister understands?

 

 **High Quality English:** stay where you are

 **SMAE:** hansol and i are getting in the car right now

 **SMAE:** we're bringing chocolate and snacks and alcohol

 **youneedjisoos:** jeonghan & i are on the way as well

 

 **jundaddy** started a private chat with  **gyu**

 **jundaddy:** hey, you two are okay right?

 **jundaddy:** they didn't hurt you or anything?

 **jundaddy:** i'm really sorry man

 **gyu:** we're alright

 **gyu:** i just thought they were more accepting you know?

 **jundaddy:** i get it

 **jundaddy:** when i told my parents about minghao and everything they didn't talk to me for a while

 **gyu:** real assuring

 **jundaddy:** let me finish you ass

 **jundaddy:** after a month or so they realized they were being dumb and said sorry and stuff

 **jundaddy:** so hopefully it wont be that bad

 **jundaddy:** i suck at comforting people im sorry

 **gyu:** its ok

 **gyu:** thanks jun

 **gyu:** im more worried about wonwoo though

 **gyu:** he thinks hes not good enough for my parents or something, even though he's perfect

 **gyu:** he's probably sadder than he's letting on

 **jundaddy:** :((

 **jundaddy:** thats just how he is, give him some time and he'll start feeling better

 **gyu:**.. i'll try

 

 

 

**stop the sin 2k17**

**dontkillmyvibe:** thank you guys

 **dontkillmyvibe:** i needed chocolate

 **jEoNgMoM:** <3

 **SMAE:** at least you're home safe now 

 **fanboy:** what happened???? im sorry i wasn't here

 **Seungbitch:** mingyu's parents didn't take him being gay well

 **fanboy:** what!

 **fanboy:** oh my gosh mingyu

 **fanboy:** im sorry

 **gyu:** it's alright channie, don't worry about it

 **still a traitor:** are you going to stay away from home for a while?

 **gyu:** i think so

 **gyu:** we'll see

 **the mediator:** you know 

 **the mediator:** i love you all :( <3

 **dkay:** best bros forever

 **still a traitor:** please NEVER say the word "bro" again

 

 

_a/n;_

NEW FIC: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11652855/chapters/26216547

im just going to put my fic link  _everywhere_ because im so excited to continue it i'm prewriting chapters rn


	24. kakaotalk has crashed! we apologize for the inconvenience.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol fUCK  
> i cant believe i havent updated this in a month and a half & i also cant believe that this fic has come to an end (a shitty end tbh lmao)  
> thanks for reading guys!! i hope everyone ended up enjoying this mess, i really tried my best lolol. it's definitely been a fun time :')  
> see you (hopefully) in my next fic!!!
> 
>  
> 
> sidenote...
> 
> guess what fucking song i was listening to while writing this bullshit
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkedncBy90k

**stop the sin 2k17**

**dontkillmyvibe** changed their name to  **Garden Fairy**

 **Garden Fairy:** daddy?

 **Garden Fairy:** i miss you

 **jundaddy:** LOL

 **jundaddy:** WONWOO YOU BIG SLUT

 **Garden Fairy:** FUCK

 **Garden Fairy:** FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK NO

 **youneedjisoos:**.... brb getting my bleach

 **gyu:** baby stop exposing your daddy kink

 **jEoNgMoM:** HAJIMA HAJI HAJI HAJI HAJIMA

 **Garden Fairy:** *my* daddy kink? 

 **gyu:**... our daddy kink? um

 **dkay:** H AAAAAAAAA J I MA

 **dkay:** fucking christ

 **youneedjisoos:** actually, it's jisoos

 **still a traitor:** leave.

 **Divaboo:** dude is it just me or would yall whore yourselves out for got7

 **High Quality English:**? scuse me

 **sugarbaby69:** o yeah definitely

 **sugarbaby69:** i bet you jaebum doesn't even like GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS

 **Divaboo:**! agree

 **Divaboo:** bet you he eats ass JUST RIGHT tho

 **sugarbaby69:** IF YOU DO get eaten out by jaebum i call getting fucked by yugyeom~

 **jundaddy:** brb tying mingwhore down to the bed

 **Seungbitch:** sigh

 **fanboy:** that doesn't sound healthy D:

 **the mediator:** i agree

 **the mediator:** bullying is bad.

 **High Quality English:** i agree with junhui

 **High Quality English:** seungkwan do you still have those silk ribbons

 **Divaboo:** i think i just moaned

 **Divaboo:** gotta fucking hajima haji haji hajima, daddy's home

 **jEoNgMoM:** What in the fuck?

 **jEoNgMoM:** Are you all on acid?

 **dkay:** everyone's sluttier than usual hmm

 **still a traitor:**.

 **still a traitor:** you know what

 **fanboy:** what?

 **youneedjisoos:** HAJIMA

 **youneedjisoos:** HAJI HAJI

 **youneedjisoos:** HAJIMA

 **youneedjisoos:** HA

 **youneedjisoos:** JI

 **youneedjisoos:** MA

 **youneedjisoos:** 하

 **youneedjisoos:** 지

 **youneedjisoos:** 마

 **jundaddy:** dsffagajfhuwefhaf

 **jundaddy:** sjdfbewiufbwuiefbsdjfbeiwu

 **jundaddy:** ororufhwuoenuowdboqw

 **jundaddy:** MINGHAO HAS NEW LACE PANTIES

 **jundaddy:** dude he makes me nut so hard the fuck

 **Seungbitch:** ok

 **Seungbitch:** im getting a headache

 **Seungbitch:** im sorry

 **dkay:** for what

 **Divaboo:** for what

 **gyu:** for what

 **Garden Fairy:** for what

 **Seungbitch:** i love you children

 **Seungbitch:** but....

 

_**** _

_**카카오 톡이 추락했습니다!** _

_**Kakaotalk has crashed!** _

_**불편을 드려 죄송합니다.** _

_**We're sorry for the inconvenience.** _

_**모바일 앱을 다시 시작하십시오.  
** _

_**Please restart the mobile app.** _

 


End file.
